jack handey deep thoughts quotes

This is an era where heroes emerge in great numbers! This is an era where death and hope exist side by side! This is an era where the old order and the fires of new civilizations collide! What kind of grand epic will be written by the decaying federation, the fanatic empire, the obstinate theocracy, and the stirring foreign races?

When he and his rumored girlfriend were spotted shopping in Paris, she smiled, "Well, my husband's taste isn't bad this time!" When he goes out to have dinner with the mayor's daughter, she remarks with a radiant face, "This tie suits you better." When he is about to get engaged with a merchant's daughter, she chooses to leave, "Dear, have a successful trip. I will have a surprise waiting for you when you return!" A few days later, the man approached her with a dangerous aura, "So the divorce was your surprise gift to me?" "Yes! What a great gift! Don't you like it, Mr. Gu?" What more could a husband like him want from a wise and understanding wife like her? Unknowingly, she stole his heart. Though she left, she never returned his heart. He said that letting her leave was the biggest mistake he ever made. He had spoiled her for four years, and from now on, he would spoil her for the rest of his life. [Glorious husband + sly Da Bao + adorable Little Treasure, why would you refuse this marriage? The warm-hearted husband never changes his deep love. This is a story of immense pampering and minor hardships with a happy ending, welcome to dive in!]

Reader Bonus: Free research notes & background intel added to key chapters' "Creator Thoughts" — dive deeper without paying a coin! -------------- 【Immigration Notice】 Date: ████-██-██ Location: ‘██’ Application requirements are as follows: 1. Familiarize yourself with the ‘Corner Law’. 2. Have a clear understanding of █ people, anomalies, and monsters, and possess a certain level of appreciation for ██ literature. 3. Physically and mentally healthy, with no infectious diseases or history of mental illness. 4. Possess at least one skill, not limited to infrastructure, medicine, sports, etc. 5. Families have a high immigration priority. Make the most important decision of your life, to become a new immigrant in the United Nations, and engrave your own name on the monument of human history. Thank you for your cooperation.

That day, the breath of the great whale dispersed the fog, and a new era arrived. Chen Qi accidentally transmigrated into the steampunk-apocalyptic game world of 'New Sun,' starting with the monstrous talent "Deep Sea Affinity," where ancient deep-sea creatures saw him as one of their own. Although he possessed the talents of a monster, as a transmigrator, he still maintained the original intentions of humanity, striving to level up with the firm resolve to become a world-renowned Monster Hunter. Finally, after his relentless efforts, the popular Dove Times sharply commented: "From the ancient deep sea, a scoundrel with evil bloodlines who threatens witches with tentacles, the arrogant lone Emperor of the Fifth, who aims to conquer the Witch Sea!" False news, blatant false news! Even though he grew tentacles, threatened witches, raised sea dragons, collected tolls, and sang the death chorus with sea monsters. He was truly not of any Deep Sea Ancient God's bloodline but a dedicated and responsible Hunter. Chen Qi cut down the fleet before him and earnestly clarified.

“Su Xiaomeng, about that night—” One sentence from Yin Shixiu and her world tilts. He’s her best friend’s thirty-two-year-old uncle, a man whose name opens every door in the city, and the last person she wants to tangle with. “Uncle, look—you weren’t thinking straight and I was blackout drunk. Let’s just pretend it never happened, okay?” “…Fine.” Three months later he discovers—via an excited niece—that Su Xiaomeng is pregnant. “The moment the baby’s born, you let me leave. No more hounding me!” “…Fine.” He signs the marriage contract she writes herself. “Uncle, I need spicy hot pot at midnight…” “…Fine.” He’s out the door in the snow, gathering ingredients until his fingers turn blue. “Uncle, I’m scared. He’s kicking so hard—it hurts…” “Alright, alright—no more babies after this.” On the eve of delivery, he strokes her back, whispering promises until her breathing steadies.

In an era of global awakening of supernatural abilities, Lin Tianming awakens his SSS-level talent. He thought he was about to reach the pinnacle of his life, only to overhear the heartfelt thoughts of his school beauty girlfriend who hates him to the core. [Lin Tianming, you didn't expect me to be reborn, did you? In my previous life, you let me down. In this life, I will not be fooled by your sweet words again!] Having a reborn girlfriend who is merely putting on a show is already troublesome enough, but little does he know, there's more than one person he has wronged. At this moment, each of them is on their way to find him! -------------------------- Features elements of Lovecraftian horror, with themes of inner demons, corruption, genetic ascension, mechanical ascension, and psionic ascension emerging in the later stages.

Five years ago, she saved him but lost the most precious thing a girl could have. Five years later, he descended from the heavens to protect her peace and guard her safety. Yet, she said, "I'm sorry, but we're not familiar." He smirked, "I know about the birthmark on your body. Wouldn't you say we are familiar?" She harbored secrets, feigned weakness, and endured for many years. While she abided by the world, she was cold and evasive towards him. He held a high social status, controlling everything around him. He was cold-hearted towards the world, yet only tender down to the bone to her. Until one day, he pulled the little guy who was hiding behind her, "Stealthily making a miniature version of me and you say we're not familiar?" A small treasure stood in front of her, blinking and staring at him, "Mom said I popped out from a stone crack!"

Duncan Abnomar was transmigrated to a magical world. Most of the lands of the world had sunken, and the surviving humans could only live on islands. Due to an unknown reason, the world was also contaminated and strange phenomena and things would randomly appear. Humans had developed steam gear technology, and the islands were connected through boats. They survived by studying strange phenomena that happened all around the world. However, as the captain of a scary-looking ghost ship, Duncan was facing a huge challenge. "How the heck do I steer this ship?" Highly recommended by experienced editor: MC is transmigrated to a world mostly covered in water and far from civilization. He becomes the captain of the ghost ship, the 'Homeloss'. He steers through the fog and adventures through the broken world and the unknown deep sea. As he discovers the ruins of abandoned civilization, he would also stumble into the war between the strange phenomena and the devil gods. The story takes place in a combination of ocean and Chutly mythology world, a new and interesting background. It’s an attractive story to read due to the author’s sense of humor and mastery over the ambiance of the story. --------------- Another-style introduction: "On that day, a thick fog engulfed everything. On that day, he became the captain of a ghost ship. On that day, he crossed the dense fog and faced a completely overturned and shattered world – the former order was completely gone, and peculiar phenomena dominated the endless seas beyond civilized society. The island city-states and the fleets challenging the sea have become the only lights of civilization left, while the shadows of old days still lurk in the deep sea, waiting to devour this dying world again. But for the new captain, there's only one pressing question – Does anyone know how to sail this damn ship?!"

Earth is the human civilization’s cradle, but humans cannot possibly live within its cradle for eternity. In 2264, the first deep-space colonization spaceship of human civilization leaves the solar system and enters the boundless darkness… Zhang Yuan, son of the man behind the spaceship’s main control system, is one of the half a million volunteers to embark on the 20 light-year journey to a new planet. Follow Zhang Yuan on his journey of gaining new knowledge, exploring the unknown, and finding out what's the secret behind the intelligence enhancer his father left him.

[Pure • Sweet • Enemies-to-Lovers • 1v1] Yun Ran—master physician, poisoner, and martial artist—was living her best life until lightning rewrote her résumé: now she’s the abused eldest daughter of a noble house. Forced into a wedding sedan by her scheming sister, she lands beside Highness Nangong Mo, rumored blind, crippled, and dying. Wedding-night script: Highness: “I’m a broken man; divorce me and be free.” Yun Ran (tearful): “I’ll stay till your last breath.” Inner monologue he hears: [Divorce? Why? Free mansion, endless gold. Once you croak, I’ll bury you and keep it all. Chef’s kiss.] Highness smiles thinly: “Charming plan, my dear.”