My boyfriend didn't really want to marry me. Later, he was forced to tell his family, but I wasn't sure if he loved me.

My boyfriend and I have been together since high school. It has been more than six years now. I'm 25 now. I really want to get married because I feel insecure. He's not bad to me, but he's sometimes hot and cold to me. In the past six months, he mentioned that I wanted to get married and asked him to tell his family at the end of the year. However, when it came to the specified date, he never said that he wanted to register. I questioned him and he said that his mother had never liked me. In the past six months, when he mentioned me, his mother would ask him to break up with me. My boyfriend also tried his best not to break up. In December, his family finally said that it was fine as long as he liked it, but he still refused to register with his family. Because he felt that his parents had finally let go, he immediately said that he was afraid that they would not be able to accept it. After that, I had been arguing with him for a long time. One of the main reasons was that I lacked a sense of security. Because he had not been treating me as well as before recently. He seemed to be deliberately avoiding me, probably because he did not want to argue with me. But because of this, I lacked a sense of security. It made me change from thinking that he loved me, but his family did not allow it. It became that he did not love me anymore. Because during this period of time, There was once, and it was the only time, when he didn't wear a condom. He shot inside, but he was afraid that I would get pregnant. He said that we were still young and couldn't afford to have a child, so the next day, he bought me morning-after pills. At that time, my heart was very cold. In my eyes, we had reached the age of marriage, but he still told me to take medicine. I don't know if it was normal.
I've been to his house a few times and met his family. His mother didn't seem to like it from the beginning. Maybe she mentioned it to him a few times. Then, my boyfriend never asked me to go to their house for dinner again. Now that I think about it, it's been five years. But now, I feel that I have to face the other party's parents when I get married. My boyfriend never asked me to go. Our plan was half a year later, but he hasn't done anything. In addition, he's been treating me like this recently. I feel that he doesn't love me that much anymore. I'm very upset. I don't know how to let it go. I've tried to break up, but I don't seem to be able to do it. What should I do?

Answer 1

This was a thorny problem that required many considerations.

First of all, she needed to understand why her boyfriend's family wanted him to speak his mind. Maybe they're testing him on purpose, maybe they're thinking about your future, no matter what the reason is, you need to face it calmly.

Secondly, you need to know if your boyfriend really loves you. You can feel his feelings through communication, interaction and observation. Perhaps in his heart, the opinions of his family are more important than your feelings.

Finally, he needed to deal with his emotions. You may feel uneasy, disappointed, or angry, but you need to learn to face these emotions and not let them control your actions. You can talk to him about your feelings, but you need to respect his decision and the opinions of his family.

To solve this problem, you need to consider and deal with many aspects, but in the end, you need to believe in your love and marriage and not the opinions of others.