A Dream?... More Like A Nightmare

'Why is this...'

The night air around Wellston was stale and dusty as it had been since the explosion occurred that morning just outside of town. The sun had been blocked since then because of the smoke billowing from the crater of ground zero, visible from any part of the city and had only just cleared up before night had fallen and the beasts became known. Since the explosion, anything without an ability seemed to mutate rapidly, changing into some kind of starving monstrosity shaped like a mutated wolf or animal with spikes randomly jutting from their joints, with a rare few even using powers gained from their mutations. They seemed to be at least partially made of aura and random powers, otherwise, he wouldn't have been able to sense them with his own passive ability, and no one would have survived the beast's surprise attack nearly ten hours ago. It was the only way he could perceive them now that his eyes had been forced shut from dried blood and his ears had been busted from a beast's sonic roar.

But that didn't stop him as John once more charged up a scattered laser shot to bring an end to another few dozens of abominations, only for another hundred took their place. He'd lost track of how many he'd dealt with, at least a hundred in the last 30 seconds alone, but they kept coming; dragging themselves over their fallen brethren's corpses, piled high in front of the school between the wrecked gates and rubble that used to be the neighboring buildings. The school building behind him was thankfully untouched save for a few craters from him throwing the beasts away when he was done with them and some busted windows, from which you could barely see heads of many different shades of colored hair and terrified dim eyes peeking out.

There were people behind him, though they had long lost the ability to keep fighting. Those strongest people of his generation were all there, the royals, well ex-royals now he supposed. The aqua blue-haired healer Elaine was doing her best to care for the injured even as her green eyes continued to rain tears over Arlo's matted straw gold hair, his body nearly crushed under the feedback from countless shattering of his own barriers, all spent trying to protect the others, all leaving their tolls, and him, unconscious.

The blonde Isen and the redhead Blyke were among those able to somewhat move, their hair slicked down to their scalps from blood, both theirs and the mutants. The comrades were using Isen's tracking ability to aim Blyke's lasers at anything they could hit, their amber and gold eyes only slightly luminescent trying to buy themselves and everyone else a little more time, waiting for Elaine to finish healing the consequences of Arlo's ability; when his barrier is broken it reflects the damage onto him rather than his opponent.

The two waited anxiously for her to finish so that their own countless bruises and cuts could be patched up enough for them to stand straight and continue fighting. Claire blew her shoulder-length, green hair out of her red eyes as she attempted to keep an eye on John while keeping pressure on the three-inch-wide hole going through her right thigh from a lucky monster that had ambushed her on her way to the school earlier that night.

Cecile was tying her teal-colored bloody hair back with the one hand that didn't have shrapnel from an exploding car still stuck in it, her exhausted body refusing to move or produce another energy tendril, as she used her own back to prop up the magenta-haired Seraphina as she was wrapping a ripped shirt around her wound trying to stop the bleeding from the seven-inch long fang going through her arm, her blue eyes dimly glowing, her time abilities long given out on her now that she'd just gotten them back and pushed them harder than ever before to watch John's back, as he's always done for her.

'Why are there…'

He had to fight.

Harder…

Faster…

More…

He needed more!

Otherwise, they were all going to die!

He sidestepped a clumsy lunge while putting his fist through the skull of the next monster and charged up his own amped up version of Blyke's lasers all around his body to clear the area around him of bodies, both the dead monsters and the living, to buy some more time. A hundred mini lasers went off at once, eviscerating everything around him.

"I won't let you take them from me! Do you hear me!?", he shouted as he brought his own barrier around the injured and fought to the best of his abilities to save them.

Images of his father stepping between John and the first monster they had met, and his heart being skewered for his efforts flashed through his mind… along with the smile of pure relief William directed at him even as he was thrown aside and torn apart by the other monsters following the first.

More followed of the times he spent in New Bostin with Claire, fighting, learning about his powers, becoming strong, falling in love with her, setting it aside out of uncertainty, and her perceived betrayal.

'I'm sorry I was so blind… I never wanted to hurt you. You were my best friend and I refused to listen, to change, and this is where we end up?'

He ducked before jumping sideways and calling on his own lightning to fry another few dozen of his enemies before pausing to catch his breath.

Images of the time spent with Sera came and went; of meeting her, fighting, learning, laughing, and helping each other through their broken lives even if the other didn't know. Of learning more about her without her having to say; what she really wanted (to be free), what she needed (to learn to let go), and what she needed from him (his support and honesty).

He failed… Every time he tried to do the right thing he failed, five times he had fallen in love and he had never been able to do right by any of them. It's always been that way ever since New Bostin. He thought there was only one way to stop what happened to him from happening to others by treating everyone the same way he was for years, until it took over his whole life and Claire had to bring an end to it the only way she thought she could; by bringing everyone against him…

It failed… and after being tortured… re-educated on how to fit into society he went to Wellston and promised to never use his abilities again… like his life would ever let him go without more pain.

Of his time as Joker, dethroning the royals, and then properly becoming King when the joker imposters were running around. Fighting, beating, breaking everything around him, and everyone… including himself.

He lied to Sera…

He yelled at her when she was trying to help him because he let the hurt, rage, sorrow, guilt, and pain take over his whole life again. He hurt her…

Thousands more of the monsters crowded down the streets towards the school behind them and the beaten students helplessly watched as John fought as he had fought for the last twelve hours; punching, kicking, frying, electrocuting, and raising barriers to buy more time.

He hurt her… just like he always did to the people he loved… and now they were all going to die.

'I can last a little longer!'

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John collapsed to one knee twelve hours after the battle had begun, delirious from blood loss and exhaustion, even as his eyes sputtered between his normal pair and his weakly glowing burnt gold that signified him using his powers. His breath rushed through his skewered lung, rubbing against his broken ribs from hours earlier, and his broken knuckles rubbed against the ground as he tried to force himself to stand and fight once more, his busted ears no longer bleeding.

'How can I…'

John stood once more to take a stumbling step forward on skewered and shattered legs, run through with chunks of rubble and the bones fragments protruding from the mutants' bodies, as the monsters raced towards him. He raised his broken and battered hands and flared his aura once more in preparation for the abominations assault, their hungry eyes gazed at the helpless and hurt people behind him even as he continued to walk away from the school, straight towards the horde that slowly parted; allowing a behemoth shaped like a gorilla from hell to stride forward, fifteen feet tall and unbothered by the liquid fire his body seemed to naturally produce, nor the molten blades that seemed to poke out of its body from the monstrosities forearms.

He didn't see the tears running down Sera's cheeks as she watched the most important person in her life fight for her… to protect her.

He didn't see the shock and awe on the faces of the students, faculty, and refugees of the destroyed city he was protecting.

He didn't see the pain and determination in the eyes of Remi as she tried to drag herself off the ground, only to fall back down again from exhaustion; legs weak from blood loss.

He couldn't see the utter heartbreak of Claire as she watched her first love continue to trade his life for theirs.

He couldn't hear the desperate begging of Sera and Cecile to stop; they could no longer bear to watch him continue to die.

He couldn't hear the refugees of the now burnt and busted town they all lived in rushing behind him towards cover, crying for, begging him to get up, to take another stand, and fight.

How could he when he could no longer even tell where his enemies were without his own sensing ability?

John saw none of this as he continued forward, undaunted, and accepted the challenging roar, the seeming horde alpha with his own shout of denial towards the fate that would take those he wished to love.

Towards the loss of those girls who he had spent the last twelve hours reliving every interaction with over and over again as he forced his body to defend them.

Towards his own trauma that dared to rear its head when he had people to protect.

He raced forward, charging a laser in one hand and lightning in the other as he met the charge head-on and combined the two to propel himself up and over his foe, only to bring them both to bear again through the spine and heart of the horde leader, bringing it down as he stumbled past its corpse, only to continue his slow trek towards the now wary horde.

'How can I save them… When I can barely save myself?'

John released a shaky breath, ignoring the liquid that continued to trail from all of his wounds, and finally straightened to his full height. With his back towards the few people he honestly wished to protect; their faces flashing through his mind as he sightlessly glared towards the army of abominations.

'Remi… you were naïve and ignorant to the pain of the weak and trampled, but the desire to help people you inherited from your brother is indeed beautiful and will carry you far, as long as you hold it tightly; don't end up like me, keep your heart strong and stunning as always. I'm sorry I don't have the time to apologize to you, I wish I could have a second chance to tell you this and take your hand this time, I'd hold tight and never let go.'

'Celine… you were tired of the status quo, of being unrecognized for your hard work and talent in both your journalism and abilities so you sought out someone capable of forcing great change. You found me and placed all of your hope on me being strong and just; you found the monster I thought I had outrun instead. I'm sorry that I hurt you, that I betrayed your heart in the same exact way I convinced myself I had been betrayed. I wish I had the chance to be the beacon of support you were looking for.'

'Elaine… you are one of Sera's best friends. No matter how much I didn't like your attitude towards people, I refused to see how you never turned your back on her even when she no longer had her powers. Thank you for being there when I wasn't. I didn't mean to terrify you so much; I panicked when I realized that you knew what I could do and did the first thing that came to mind, threaten you into silence. I wish I had time to earn that same loyalty you never once stopped showing towards Sera. I'd apologize every day for even thinking of hurting you for the chance.'

'Claire… there are no words, there will never be enough words to apologize to you. The desire to make you forgive me would be a sin against how much you cared for me. When I took things too far and turned all of the pain in my chest against anything and everything around me, you still cared, even when that pain was aimed at the wrong things and people. You cared enough to put yourself against me and force me to acknowledge the monster I was acting like… so instead I will say thank you for the chance to make myself into the man my father thought I could be, a protector, if you hadn't gone against me, I'd probably been dead long before this; either through choking on all of the pain I was aiming towards others or biting off more than I can chew while picking fights because I never could back down. I wish I could let you know all of this so I could tell you thank you every single time I saw you.'

'Sera… I guess I don't have the right to call her by that nickname anymore huh? I lied over and over again, trying to hide my ability because I thought that it would turn you against me, like I thought it turned everyone last time. When we met, you were no different than any other god-tier person; arrogant, demanding, uncaring, and blind to the suffering of others. As we continued to spend time together you showed me everything you could be. You were kind, you cared, you were understanding; you were everything I wished I was when I was still using my abilities. There are no words to describe how priceless you were to me, and I went and yelled at you; called you a cripple and a fake. A betrayer when in reality it was me who betrayed you with those lies and words. I wish I could tear this broken heart from my chest and offer it to you so you could pay me back until the end of time now that your ability is back. I'm sorry you'll never hear these words, I wish I could stay by your side forever in any way that you'd have me, to spend the rest of my life-redeeming myself before I drag myself down to hell.'

John continued to stand as a wall against the rapidly frenzied horde of monsters, their fear giving way to rage as they egged each other on-wards towards the lone defender, his back straight and body steady as he prepared himself to fight for however much longer they needed him to; those five irreplaceable women and those innocent people taking shelter inside the school relying on him just as his father had always hoped they would when they saw his son.

However what John could no longer perceive was the growing horror and pain on the faces of the people he was protecting, for within the long line of people he had bought time to make it into the safety of the school was a small ten-year-old girl who sought to understand how his back remained like steel to protect her mother and herself. This child had a very special ability; she could lock onto people's auras and understand everything about them. Every memory, every loss, every trauma, and every thought, as well as every regret, was understood by this girl even as her passive ability went to work and broadcasted every last memory and memory of the information she had grasped to everyone looking at the same person she was, which just so happened to be every person inside the school, as well as the people John's barrier was protecting.

John didn't notice the tears that now poured for him, nor the anguished screams calling for him to come back, nor the five equally shattered hearts that he held in his broken, bloody (worthless), hands against the storm of pain and grief he protected them from; held together only through his own survival, for those beautiful souls had, without his notice, accepted him in his full self the only way they could, by offering themselves in their entirety.

The last thing John remembered was taking another step forward and answering the frenzy with his own blast of lightning-empowered lasers before everything went quiet and dark.

Though his mind had succumbed to exhaustion, his body continued to stumble; step after step. His will had always been what had pushed him forward and now was no different as that body continued to follow his only desire, his only prayer for himself.

'Don't stop moving until they're safe.'