Chapter 8 — Desperation and Disappointment

Qhawekazi's plea for help was met with a mixture of curiosity and concern. Mam'Mngomeni's expression softened as she asked about her father's funeral cover. Qhawekazi's embarrassment was palpable as she shook her head, her eyes cast down.

Mam'Mngomeni's response was understanding but firm. "Qhawekazi, you know my only income is my pension. I have to buy groceries for my grandson and his mother." Her words were laced with empathy, but Qhawekazi knew she had to move on.

With a heavy heart, she bid Mam'Mngomeni farewell and continued her journey to Bab'Khawula's house, her father's close friend. The long distance and dusty road took its toll on her, but she pressed on, driven by desperation.

As she arrived at Bab'Khawula's RDP house, she was taken aback by his brutal tone and swollen face. His anger towards her father was palpable, and Qhawekazi's heart raced as she tried to explain her presence. But Bab'Khawula's rage was unrelenting, and he slammed the door shut, leaving her with nothing but disappointment and fear.

As she walked back home, the weight of her situation crushed her. Her last hope had been extinguished, and she felt like she was drowning in a sea of uncertainty. The envelope addressed to her, written in bold letters, caught her attention. She opened it with trepidation, her eyes scanning the letter from her mother, written four years ago.

The words on the page were a mix of love, longing, and regret. Qhawekazi's heart ached as she read her mother's side of the story, searching for answers that had haunted her for so long. The letter was a window into her mother's soul, and Qhawekazi felt a deep connection to the woman who had given her life.

As she read on, Qhawekazi's tears fell onto the page, smudging the ink. Her mother's words painted a picture of a woman who had made mistakes, but loved her daughter with all her heart.

"I had to leave, Qhawekazi, because I wasn't strong enough to be the mother you deserved," her mother wrote. "But I want you to know that I've always thought of you, and I'm so proud of the young woman you've become."

Qhawekazi's heart swelled with emotion as she read the words. She had always wondered why her mother had left, and now she knew. It wasn't because she didn't love her, but because she wasn't strong enough to be the mother she needed.

As she finished the letter, Qhawekazi felt a sense of peace wash over her. She realized that her mother's leaving wasn't about her, but about her mother's own struggles. And in that moment, she forgave her mother, and herself.

With a newfound sense of clarity, Qhawekazi looked around the hut, at the chaos she had created in her frustration. She took a deep breath, and began to clean up the mess, her heart lighter than it had been in days.

As she worked, she thought about her father's funeral, and how she would make it happen. She knew it wouldn't be easy, but she was determined to give him the sendoff he deserved.

And as she swept the floor, she felt a sense of purpose, a sense of direction. She knew that she would face challenges in the future, but she was ready to face them head-on, with the love and support of her mother, and the lessons she had learned from her father.