I See Darkness Where Others See Beauty

That day was warm. The summer weather had somehow decided to peek through the usually cold and sad clouds. It was a shame Lucus was bed bound. He could hear the conversations of couples and children running around enjoying what Lucus could not. He had heard about a girl named Helen Keller. A blind and deaf woman who was able to achieve great things in many male dominated areas. Compared to what Lucus was going through, he felt just as "normal" as anyone else. He tossed a paper ball up and down a few times before dropping it and letting it roll away. A new record of 27 tosses in a row. A huge accomplishment if you can't even see the ball. Whenever people saw him do something "normal" or required a lot of sight, they assumed that he had some kind of help, or he was faking a disability. The door creaked open loudly. Loud thuds of loafers and the swish of a suit. This was accompanied by a strong smell of cologne.

"Hello sir." said Lucus. He had just told the principal his story yesterday. He seemed to work pretty fast. From what he could tell, the principal had a jolly fat tummy and a kind voice. (He could hear people point it out on occasion at school.)

"How's hospital life treating you?" asked the principal. He set down a very important looking briefcase and sat down in a small chair. He groaned loudly as if letting out a big sigh as he sat down. "That substitute teacher of yours is going away for a long time. I doubt she'll ever teach again. Oh, and that boy you saved, he's a lot better now. He's going to be back at school next week." he smiled and popped open a bottle of water.

"That's great!" Lucus beamed and leaned back, looking upwards. He let out a sigh, "Do you know when I'll be going back?" There was a pause and the principal set down the water slowly before answering.

"Well, we don't know if you'll be able to come back to our school. Not for any reason about you, and we really do want you back, however…" he trailed off.

"What is it?" asked Lucus quietly.

"Your mother doesn't want you coming back. She wants you to continue homeschooling." he looked down ashamed.

"But I like this school!" Lucus shot up. Did he like this school? "It didn't treat me too well at first… but I have friends! I don't want to leave them. I didn't have any before this. I can't lose them." He never made friends in the orphanage, and every time he went to the park when he was younger, the others stayed away from him like the plague. 'Be careful of the kid with the red hair he can't see.' 'really? Is it contagious?' 'Yeah' 'I hear he attacks people with his stick.' 'Does he even have eyes?' 'I'm not sure, I can't see under his bangs' 'he might be dangerous' 'yeah, let's go somewhere else' he spent his days sitting on the swings, rocking back and forth until it was time to go. Before he knew it, tears were streaming down his face as he began to cry.

"I'm sorry. There wasn't anything I could do." With that, the principal picked up his hat and suitcase, and left. He was discharged a few weeks later and one of the kids from the orphanage brought him home. He was silent the whole time, despite many efforts to get him to speak. Nobody could coax him out of the greenhouses. He sat for hours on end stroking his book. He ran his fingers up and down the leather indents on the cover. A tortoise, and a hare. They were racing. In big bold letters at the top it read "Aesop's Fables". After a few days of simply moping around, Mother came in.

"You know they have to water the plants at some point." Mother leaned on the side of the entrance.

"I watered them already." mumbled Lucus turning away from the door.

"What was that? Speak up." taunted Mother teasingly.

"I WATERED THEM!" burst Lucus spinning around forcefully.

"Okay, calm down. I don't want you waking up the kids."

"Screw the kids! Let them cry! I couldn't care less." he scowled and glared at her. Angry tears were running down his face in drops the size of trucks. Every pent up frustration was now coming out.

"Why can't I go to school!?! Why can't I see my friends?!? Why can't I be normal! I wish I was normal. I wish I lived in a normal house. I wish I lived a normal life. I wish I could live in a normal world. Not this messed up world of my own. All I've ever seen is darkness. When you're blind the whole world is dark. Nothing is visible. No light. Just my own empty void. But no one understands. YOU will never understand." He couldn't breathe. He was hurling words without stopping. Hurtful daggers dipped in poisonous hate.

"Of course I understand-"

"No you DON'T understand! You could never understand! Do people whisper about you in the hallways?!? Are you looked at as a burden rather than a human being?!? When you accomplish something slightly 'normal' do people question your path to get there?!? What is normal?!? All I can hear is how wonderful the world looks and how sad it is that I can't see it. WHAT IS SO WRONG WITH ME? What is sight? Nobody ever taught me. All I "see" is darkness where others see beauty. What am I missing? What makes me so different?"

"You are perfect the way you are. I see you as a human-"

"WHO CARES WHAT YOU THINK? Are you so much better than me or any other human? I bet I'm a burden to you too, aren't I Margaux." he spat those words before getting up, and running.