The blood of a Warrior in me....

The rustling in the palace trees and the clanging pots and pans from the palace savants in the kitchen had woken me from my long dreamless sleep, I toss and turn in my sleep for what seemed like a minute, trying to piece together fragments of memory, until it hits me, I had been assisting a pregnant queen in giving birth.

Now, a wave confusion washes over me as i struggle to remember how I have ended up back in my room, "I didn't see the baby" I whisper to myself, "I only saw the head and....oh....did it died? She must have pulled its head off", I whisper and then I remember the pain I felt last night while I touch my head in reaction to the thought that is going through my mind, that same pain, except that it feels more like an injury now.

I quickly drop my hand as I try to recall, "I must have passed out as I couldn't take the pain" I say. I roll out of my bed and head straight for my mother's room, my head pounds and feels a bit foggy but I can manage.

If I can find my mother, it would only be a matter of minutes, and I'll be as good as new, except for my hand which I'm still not sure what has gone wrong with it. "She is a monster" I say in a hushed voice, if she could do this to a tiny little hand of mine, what else will she not do to survive.

I feel worried for my mother now, she's not ment for things like this, she's so kind and peaceful, what if she gives birth to a girl child again. I reach her room but she's not in there, "Where could she be?" i ask as I look everywhere, "has father returned from his journey already?" I whisper, she must have gone to his quarters, but if he is back he would have been in my room long ago, "he's not back yet" I say.

She probably would have gone to check on younger queen in her quarters, I should head over to the younger queen's quarters now. On my way to younger queen's quarters, I notice the female savants staring at me, I can feel their gazes fixated on me, confusion sets in, as I briefly wonder if there's something amiss with my attire.

I push all those thoughts aside, what ever they are looking at, it doesn't matter to me, I shouldn't let it bother me. Dwelling on that will only lead to their suffering, but I do not want to see them hurt because of me. I can see all the palace wives and children in the younger queen's quarters now, I ignore most of them as I do not like the care they all pretend to have for me.

Most of them probably wished their children had my life.

I can see her now, my footsteps slowly stops as I notice her eyes fixated on me, she looks me in the eyes without saying a word as if she isn't satisfied with what she had done to my hand I look around and my mother's no where to be found, now where could she be, I turn around to take my leave, "DERERA" she calls in a calm voice, only my mother calls me by that name, but this isn't her voice, why would she call me now, I wonder.

I turn around, and there it is, a smile that I translate as an evil smile. She comes closer and stretch out her hand, "I'm so sorry, I had forgotten you were here last night, and I had done that to you", she says as she stared at my hand. She must have noticed from the way I moved it carefully. I lift it up for her to see, she looks at me with so much care in her eyes, but deep down I know she's faking it.

"Does it hurt?" she ask as she examines my hand carefully, I shake my head hoping she would let me go now, but she offers to massage it.

Now I'm worried if this wasn't another plan of ruining it completely. I understand from the pain am feeling it had not been treated or perhaps no one even noticed it. I feel a sharp pain deep in my heart, I'm about to let her come really close to me again, the first time she did, I ended up waking up in my room with an injured hand. I feel like I'm betraying my mother but then, she wouldn't care, she sent me here in the first place. She probably doesn't see things the way I do, I wish for one second she would, for one minute.

I believe I can see clearly what this young woman has planned for her, my sweet mother. She takes me to a wooden stood in the centre of the room, I sit, and she gets her's from the other opposite door-less room and sits at my injured right hand.

First, she wash my hand with ỌSẸ ẸBẸRE, a traditional medicinal liniment used for treating injuries like this, at first it's painful and then slowly it goes away.

I look around, from where I'm sitting, I could see the whole place, into the corners of the house, and I realized there is no sign of the baby.

Oh, it must have died, but if it had died, how could she be here right now, not sad in the slightest bit, but massaging my injured hand, no it can't be, definitely Iya Abiyẹ had taken it away last night to perform the ỌMỌ TINTUN rituals for the child.

This rituals are performed to keep the child strong and safe from illness and diseases that could cause disabilities or death of the child, soon it rushes to me, "it's a boy" I say in a hushed voice, she looks at me and nod, that ritual is only performed on a male child, now I'm even more worried not sure what I should do now, should I leave now, or let her finish, it's better I calm down and let her finish, I can figure something out later.

I look up and stare at her as she's now applying ORI and one other smelly thing that I don't know what it is. If only I can read her mind and see what she's devicing In there. She looks back at me and smile, what's that for, could she possibly know what I'm thinking, she must be a witch because she looks too strong for a woman who just gave birth to a child last night.

This feels strange to me, a few months ago my uncles wife gave birth to her baby and it took her a couple of weeks to recover from it, and here's this. How is this possible?

"Ah, I think that's enough now, I need to go now, thanks" I say as I rise on my feet, she nods without uttering a word. Quickly, I turn around and walk away as fast as my feet could carry me, I'm soon out of her quarters. Now I remember the baby, even at my age, I know what's good for me and what's bad. I know this one is bad for me, so much could happen to me, now my father would stop coming to my room to tell me stories of his journey at night or to drag me out of bed as his own way of waking me up at dawn. He would barely remember me as he will spend most of his time now in her quarters playing with the baby and expecting more.

Now I feel even more worried for my mother, if her baby turns out to be a girl, he will slowly give up on her, on us.

I run into our quarters Calling for her, I hug her as soon as I find her, she looks so peaceful like always, not even worried a bit, how could she be. Now I'm confused, don't know if I should say what's going on in my mind, or if I should just keep it to myself.

I need her to be prepared as much as I want her to be happy, it wouldn't be alright to tell her such things in her condition, she could be due in a few weeks, or less. I just have to be able to protect her myself, even if she gives birth to a girl child, it doesn't matter, as long as we have each other, what could possibly go wrong.

"I love you mother" I say and she glance back at me and run her fingers down through my hair, "I know my Princess, and I love you too" she say, "what happened to your hand?" She asks, I try my best to make it look fine but I can barely do that, "I must have slept on it last night" I say, "oh, let me see" she tries to take my hand, but I wouldn't let her "does it hurt?" She ask, "not so much" I say, "you don't need to worry, I made MOYEMI massage it for me" I say.

"Alright then, make sure she massages it before you go to sleep." she say, I nod and she goes back to her room. I watch her for a moment then I turn around and head outside to the training ground.

I've always wanted to be a warrior Princess, but my father wouldn't approve, so I've always tried to be the sweet daughter he prefers. This won't go on for ever, because life feeds off of you and makes you into its slave, it can't go on forever because then, it wouldn't treat you so nicely for being kind and sweet.

However, I am aware that I possess the spirit and blood of a warrior, and although I have only recently discovered a reason to awaken it, it has always existed in my consciousness crying out to the world, it wants to be heard.

Now I must be strong, I most be stronger for my mother, for her unborn child. I'm prepared to prove to my father that a female child should not be disregarded if he wants a male child. I'm sure he will be unhappy if he finds me here, but who cares? He is always bound to dislike me, and it's only a matter of time before he does. If he were here, it would have already begun.

However, since his journey would probably take at least three weeks, and he left about a week ago, then I have two weeks to get anything going that I can before he returns. His return will determine how hard I'll have to keep going with whatever I start now.

I stand before him as he examine my hand, "it would be gone in few days, certainly two days or perhaps three" he say, I nod as he drops down on one knee, he's very tall, huge and he's so dextrous with weapons and would never take it easy on me which is why I have chosen him to train me, "but only if you want it to" he say, and I nod to show that I accept, he doesn't care if I'm a Princess or not, he sees me as an apprentice, this way he can train me as hard as he wants.

"From now on, you'd call me EMIRAN", he say, what? I wasn't expecting him to ask me to call him by his actual name, EMIRAN, I've literally called him that all my life, I was expecting something fancier, something like master or teacher, but it's no big deal though, as long as we get along, everything is alright.

He's not as I have imagined, this man usually stares at me every night from were he always sits under a shade in the palace yard, it makes me feel like he hated me, but now I understand from the way he looks at me closely now, those eyes were guarding me, watching over me, watching my every move in the palace yard to be sure that I'm fine.

Today he trains me to endure pain, due to the fact that I could not hold a sword or a spare with my right hand. He says we'd do that for a week, it almost got me walking away in anger but then I realized, he wouldn't want that for me if he didn't think i needed it.

I have to pay attention to him and do whatever he says without questions or hesitation, as he makes me lift objects that are almost half my weight with my injured hand. I push and pull, throw and catch spares and swords until suddenly I barely feel the pain, or maybe I fail to acknowledge it, he says it's a sign that I was born for this.