NINE: I Hate You

"No."

Dash's answer was soft and short.

"Then why.." she trailed off, afraid to finish the terrifying question. Until now, she'd assumed Dash sold them out on his own accord. If that wasn't the answer then what was?

"It was the king's idea," Dash murmured, his eyes lingering on the floor.

The king's idea? She thought back to their final briefing in Mevani and the signal between the king and Dash. Was this Dash's true mission?

"You said the king wanted you to spread false intel," Kel whispered.

Dash opened his mouth and closed it again. He briefly met Kel's eyes before dropping his gaze back to the ground.

"That's right," he finally responded.

Then why did he lead the enemy directly to them?

Kel stopped to consider the situation. The Serin empire had taken a fake princess hostage, so technically it was a fake lead. That meant the false intel Dash had been ordered to give out… was Kel.

"Did the others know?" Kel thought of the strange demeanor of her companions when she'd first entered the audience chamber back in Mevani.

Dash nodded.

So the threat of Serin spies wasn't what had unnerved them after all.

"Then what about the marriage?" Kel asked.

"The princess will make it safely thanks to you," Dash answered.

At that moment, another horrifying realization crossed Kel's mind. The reason they changed routes at the last minute wasn't to keep her safe from Serin, but instead to serve her up to the empire on a silver platter. All for the sake of Adriell's guaranteed safety.

"So you're saying," Kel looked up at Dash, tears stinging the corners of her eyes, "that you had to choose between me and Adriell."

"Kel, it's not li-"

"And you chose her?"

She looked away, digging her teeth into her bottom lip in a futile attempt to make it stop quivering. The sound of heavy footsteps thudded toward her, and strong hands suddenly gripped her shoulders.

"It's not something complicated like choosing between you, ok?" Dash hissed violently into her ear.

His unfamiliarly rash actions only intensified the emotions welling up in Kel's eyes. Tears immediately began to stream down her cheeks. Aggravated with her silence, Dash shook her violently.

"I just chose my country! It's not about-" he stopped as he felt Kel's body shivering in his tight grasp. Letting out a slow shaky breath, he softened his hands.

"You have to understand. I never intended to hurt you," he whispered almost inaudibly.

Kel swallowed as the tears in her eyes slowed. "Then why you? And why did you keep it a secret from me?"

"Kel, please," Dash said through gritted teeth. "It just had to be me."

"It's bad enough for my own country to throw me away, but you, Dash? You couldn't just abandon me, but you had to have front row seats as well?"

Kel slapped his hands off her shoulders. Searing pain shot through her chest while her mind was already clouded with fury. Since Dash's breathed apology in her ear back in that clearing, she'd known. The thought had been too excruciating to bear, but she could no longer avoid the truth.

Dash, the closest person in the world to her, had betrayed her.

"You know what will happen to me now, right?" emotion gushed out of Kel's mouth as Dash stood silently hanging his head. "Do you know what kind of torture Serin uses on hostages like me?"

Dash looked up slowly, biting his lip as if he had something to say.

"Not only did you send me to die, you sent me to die in the worst way imaginable!" Kel continued without giving Dash a chance to cut in.

Her fingernails dug into her palms as she tried to keep her voice down. Her tears of pain had become tears of anger, but she had to keep her temper under control. As long as everyone in this kingdom believed she was the princess, she still had a chance at survival.

"No I didn't," Dash finally responded, "The necklace Adriell gave you."

The necklace? Kel pulled the shimmering red pearl out from where it hung underneath her dress. Even after changing out of her uniform earlier, she'd kept the necklace on as some sort of desperate symbol of hope.

Dash nodded as she held it up in confusion. "That's her final gift to you. So you won't have to go through all that."

"What?"

"If you crush the pearl, it turns into a deadly poison. It can kill someone instantly."

"How will one tiny pearl's worth of poison help me escape death? I could fight off at most two guards with this," Kel spat, shaking the necklace.

"It won't help you escape death; it will help you escape torture. The poison…" Dash hesitated, "is for you."

Those last three words were the final blow. The remaining strength in Kel's body dissipated, and she slid to the floor. For those two weeks on the road, she'd been laughing, eating and bonding alongside her fellow guards—all while carrying her own death sentence around her neck.

And the others had known the whole time

With what conscience did they scarf down the food she caught for them every night or ask to hear stories about the princess? Did they really feel nothing as they left her there by the fire and ran to safety?

Dash extended his hand toward Kel. Through her bleary eyes, she caught sight of a blue glimmer dangling from his fist. It was his own necklace from Adriell.

"Give this to Barclay."

Barclay. Was he another unfortunate sacrifice in this sick plan?

"He was uncomfortable with the plan from the beginning." Dash pressed his hand into his forehead as he spoke. "But I never thought he'd actually go back for you."

With trembling fingers, Kel reached up and took the necklace from Dash. Barclay had been the only person in all of Mevani who was willing to save her. Now the most she could do for him was give him this poison so he could die quickly.

"I hate you, Dash," Kel whispered, clutching the blue pearl tightly.

Dash leaned down to stroke her hair, but stopped suddenly. Sighing, he clenched his fist and straightened up.

"I understand," he replied, emotionless.

"Leave!" Kel barked. "Don't ever appear in front of me again!"

Dash nodded and turned to go. He hesitated for a few moments with his hand hovering above the door handle before grabbing it and exiting the room.