Of course, Your Excellency. There is nothing to worry about.

Bishop Valentine Mardarrovvo – a tall and well-built man in his late fifties with a large bald spot progressively taking the place of his ashen hair - was sitting at the table in a soundproof cellar of his own mansion, nervously waiting for the young food taster to carefully chew and swallow small pieces of food that was offered him.

The red-haired young man with countless freckles covering his face gulped down the last bite and waited with the eyes of the bishop and his two guards drilling into him.

"...whew..."

After waiting for quite a while, the red-haired food tester breathed out in relief and nodded at the bishop.

"Your Excellency, it's not poisoned."

The youngster declared.

"Well, at least we know that it's not a quick-working one, that's for sure."

The ashen-haired clergyman scoffed with a bitter expression while pulling the plates towards himself.

"Your Excellency, the screening we've done on the new servants is perfect. The food is safe."

"I would believe you if not for the fact that it isn't the first time you are telling me that.... Not to mention, this is the third food tester this week."

One of the bodyguards stepped up and bowed his head deeply before assuring the bishop, but the ashen-haired man merely sighed at his words while motioning at the timid, freckled man to his side.

"That's true... but this time, we included additional guards whose only purpose is to observe the cooks and servants delivering the meals on top of having the ingredients inspected beforehand."

The other bodyguard stepped in to support his comrade and followed up with more details about the reinvented security system.

"Tsk. You're speaking as if all of those people could not be bribed with enough gold!"

Bishop Valentine clicked his tongue while glaring at his food.

"..."

He then glanced over at the timid food tester.

The freckled young man didn't show any symptoms of being poisoned, but that didn't mean anything.

Valentine furrowed his brows before taking a look at an item that the young man had brought with him.

|Well... if it means that I can have more time to make sure that its safe to eat, then why not entertain this simpleton and his invention?|

"...!"

The bishop thought to himself, reaching towards the device and picking it up, making the freckled young man perk up with a hopeful gaze.

"So... you're saying that this is a... massager...?"

Valentine asked while raising his brow, slowly rotating the item in his hands.

The item was rather particular-looking—two metal pipes stuck together, sealed on one side, with a wooden handle on the sealed side, two small leaver-like pieces of metal positioned at the connection point of the pipes and the handle, and a small piece of metal on the right side of one pipe.

"Curious looking, that's for sure, but... is it really functional?"

The bishop asked, grabbing the pipes and pushing the handle into his shoulder, moving it awkwardly.

"It doesn't feel like a bad idea, but why the odd shape? Individuality and memorable design are two things it has, but isn't it too awkward to hold? And what are those even for...?"

"Those are called the triggers, Your Excellency."

Valentine tilted his head with a sigh and nudged the two leaver-like pieces of metal. The freckled man revealed eagerly, speaking with such a strong accent that it could be mistaken for a speech impediment.

"Triggers...? Are they meant to push on the trigger points in the body? They do kind of do that, but then this part is in the way..."

The bishop furrowed his brows, pressing on the pipes so that the triggers would press against his body but then he shook his head and patted the awkwardly positioned handle painfully rubbing against the top of his shoulderblade.

"Your Excellency, let me demonstrate it myself!"

"..."

The freckled man bowed his head and respectfully reached out both hands towards the watchful bishop while standing up from the chair.

"Please do, but just demonstrate it on yourself. After all, if it's not intuitive, the invention would not sell, and you agreeing to risk your life for a chance of me becoming your patron would end up in vain."

The bishop decided and handed the item to the freckled man before warning him.

"Of course, it's intuitive! I've poured my heart and soul into its design!"

The youngster declared in exaltation, returning to his seat with the prototype.

"You see, the main point to make it useful is to release the safety like this..."

The freckled youth flicked down the small metal piece on one side of the pipe.

"Afterwards, you just need to take aim and..."

Then he proceeded to hold the open end of the barrels towards one of the bodyguards and pulled one of the triggers...

*crack* *BOOOM* *SQUELCH*

...which resulted in one barrel spitting out the fire to the sound of a deafening explosion, and immediately after, the head of the bodyguard curiously leaning in exploded into vile gore.

*THUMP* "?!?!?!"

"YOU...!"

The terrified bishop fell off his chair while covering his head and face with both arms – his second bodyguard didn't falter and proved that he was worth the money he was being paid and charged at the freckled man holding the steaming device...

...but the food taster was already pointing the dangerous end of the -massager- towards him and pulling the second trigger...

*crack* *BOOOM* *SQUELCH*

The other pipe also spat out fire but this time it wasn't the head of its target that exploded... no.

This time, a walnut-sized hole appeared in the bodyguard's chest – that being the entrance hole – and although that would be deadly even if it remained the same size, the exit hole was several times larger, resulting in bits and pieces of lungs, spine, and even heart being splattered all over the wall of the cellar behind the unfortunate victim's back.

"...ghh..." *thump* *crush*

The last words of the mutilated man weren't anything more than a groan as he dropped to the floor, hitting the table on his way down... knocking over the chalice and opening a wine bottle as well as one of the candlesticks.

"S-stop! Who are you?! Who sent you?! Why are you doing thi...?! H-huh...?"

Bishop Valentine cried out, crawling away from the table but then he froze up when he saw the freckled man reaching to his mouth and...

...pulling out saliva-covered yellow marble...

"You've got a few emergency magic pellets hidden over there. Do you really think that I will let you get to them?"

The freckled man asked with a happy smile that sent shivers up Valentine's spine. After the yellow marble was removed, the food tester's accent appeared to disappear completely.

But more than that, the man's eyes were the reason for the bishop's fear – they were that of a devil or even a demon...

"!!!"

Regardless of the warning, the ashen-haired man threw himself towards the emergency deposit as it was his best chance.

After all, he knew that he had an ace up his sleeve for such a situation...!

*crack* *ZAP*

The freckled man crushed the yellow marble, aiming it at the desperate bishop's back. He unleashed a paralysis spell that flawlessly hit the target, rendering Valentine frozen in a ridiculous position.

"KHHHHH?!"

"...pfft~!"

The utterly shocked wheeze that the incapacitated man released caused the freckled man's shoulders to shake a little as he lowered his head and snickered joyfully.

"You appear to be so confused as to why the paralysis pellet worked despite you wearing a paralysis protection charm, Your Excellency."

The freckled man chuckled while walking over to the petrified man, grabbing the collar of his shirt, and pulling him all the way back to the table, where he placed him as best as the awkward position allowed him to.

"You already know the answer to that, though. The servants in your mansion were bribed~"

"...!"

The freckled man hummed at the sight of Valentine's pupils dilating in shock.

"What were you thinking? As long as you don't use bound items, inspecting whether your protection charm is a dud or not is the most basic security measure. If his head wasn't blown apart already, I would have advised you to change the person in charge of protecting you."

"!!!"

The freckled man snickered happily, watching the blood vessels in Valentine's eyes burst as his pupils trembled.

"Alright then... Here comes the spoon~!"

The unbothered freckled man grabbed a spoon from the table and smiled blissfully while moving towards the bishop's face.

"...? !!!"

Valentine's initial confusion transformed into utter horror as he realized the piece of silverware was going straight toward his left eyeball...!

…

The freckled man was done with the bishop, so he moved past the bodies of the dead bodyguards he had propped up against the walls and picked up the deformed metal balls the size of a walnut stuck behind them. Then he walked towards the chest in the corner of the cellar. He then took off his clothes and neatly piled them together on the side that wasn't dirty, resting the metal balls on top of them together with the now cooled-down massager.

After opening the chest, he took out a handkerchief and a bottle of strong spirit that he then used together to remove all the blood from his hands and forearms.

He then took out another handkerchief that he sprinkled with more alcohol and cleaned his face.

Interestingly, all of his freckles ended up getting washed off together with the specks of Velntine's blood.

After that necessary hygiene, the freckles-less man removed his red-haired wig, revealing black hair under a hairnet. He then put the wig on the pile of clothes and took out a new one – dark brown this time – and put it on, carefully styling it before taking out fresh clothes from the chest and putting them on. He even did a quite curious thing with his shoes, as he placed more than a few pieces of thick fabric inside, which elevated his height a good few inches after he slid his feet in.

When he was done, he reached out to the chest one last time and carefully pulled out the dead body of a freckled young man with red hair whose lifeless eyes were staring into the distance as a greenish substance of some sort was dripping out of the corner of his mouth, and placed the corpse on the seat that he himself was previously taking.

Afterward, the changed man walked over to the secret storage, took all the emergency magic pellets Valentine had prepared for himself inside, and put them all in a small pile that he then neatly bundled together and threw over his shoulder.

"Aaa... ekhem... aaa... nhh.. aaaaaa~"

He then let out a low hum and changed his voice until he was satisfied with the way he sounded.

As he moved towards the door to leave the cellar, the way he walked changed completely, so when he stepped outside, he could no longer be confused with the man he was when he entered it originally.

*click*

"...eh...?"

"..."

As the dark-brown-haired man closed the door, someone gasped in confusion. When he looked over there, he saw a pale-faced maid.

She was far more surprised to see him there than he was seeing her.

After all, how could that girl expect the man who paid her to switch her employer's paralysis protection charm with a dud stand right there in front of her when she was completely certain that he had never entered the mansion?

"Are you here to clean up after His Excellency's meal?"

The dark-brown-haired man asked in a soft but cheeky voice.

"...y-yes..."

The maid gulped down her saliva before nodding her head and responding timidly, keenly watching the man's every move, ready to start running away at even the slightly suspicious action.

"Hmm... You're diligent and very commendable. Still, I wouldn't go in there if I were you."

The dark-brown-haired man made an amused expression and shook his head slightly before starting to move and casually passing the cautious girl.

...and then he left without sparing her another glance...

…

"...kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah...!"

"I told you~"

As the dark-brown-haired young man was leaving Bishop Valentine's mansion through the backdoor, the sound of the horrified scream of a maid whose curiosity had won over her sense of self-preservation resounded throughout the mansion, making him chuckle.

The scream didn't even cause his pace to hasten, as it was no longer his business. He disappeared into the night with all the evidence~