Shira never knew the beauty of being a woman, the embrace or even the touch of a man, treating her body like a woman, dominating her, to make her submit, she never knew all those pleasures, and 'Barley' was the one that thought her all that.
She could remember the first time, her body completely at his mercy as he played around with it, pleasure like no other embracing her, overriding her mind, until she finally felt like a woman, the rough treatment of his, taking control over her body, everything felt so surreal.
And Shira finally for the first time felt liberated, the pleasure took control of her, to be used, to be looked down upon, and to be roughed up, she never thought the 'feminine' side inside of her wanted this but reality differed, just as much as she wanted to avoid it, she couldn't.