Chapter ~ 005

~ I lost you to love you~

The sky had turned in to a brewing dark storm during the night. My room was covered in muted dark and dreary light that had forced itself into the curtained room. I felt drained by the colorless atmosphere, the tweeting of birds that usually inhabited my windowsill every morning was absent. It was quite ,too quite.

The room felt barren despite the litter of furniture placed purposefully in areas around the room. I hauled myself out of bed abandoning the warm blankets. I felt my body shiver slightly, I wanted to return to the comfort of my bed. I had never been active or enjoyed outdoors the same way at Tris who thrived on exercise. She spent most of her morning at the gym or out jogging whilst I am in my bed snuggling with a book.

Lately I had become obsessed with re-reading childhood novels the likes of the Percy Jackson Series and the Harry Potter Series. I had read both series when I was in primary school. I did not have a large group of friends except the librarian who would intently listen to me rumble about books the I had either read or was planing on reading.

The was something beautiful and even soothing about indulging in childish pleasures. I had a difficult time letting go of things and that had led to me having every single novel that I had bought or been gifted with since I was in primary.

I still had the bucket of LEGO’s that I had received from my dad when I was eight. I remember him unexpectedly coming home on the day with a huge box and a caramel cake from or local grocery store. I had not believed he would come that year because my mother had told me that the government had deployed him to Iraq for the year to help with the war raging there. The LEGOs had represented a time of innocence in my life, a time when I was unaware of the dangers that came with dads job. I had thought that he would always be around games with that society deemed not feminine, that the rugby matches on the our tiled floor where he would let me win every time would never leave. I was foolish to believe that everything would last forever.

I walked to the bathroom still wearing my fuzzy socks and unicorn sleepers that had been gifted to me by Tris for Christmas that previous year. After taking a much needed shower and doing my other hygiene related things I put on a plain white t-shirt with faded black jeans and a light grey hoodie.

I went ahead and had breakfast which consisted of cereal and a cup of warm tea and the proceeded to seat on the breakfast table and began to revise the work for the first semester. The semester focused on psychopathology which dealt with identify abnormal behavior in children based on normal childhood development and also delved into adult abnormal behavior. The module was quite extensive in the topics covered and found myself fascinated with the module as I felt it focused on the matters that I wanted to focus.

I found myself working throughout the day only stopping to take bathroom and food breaks. It had begun to rain midday through to the late afternoon. I found the sound of the rain hitting against the windows of the small apartment soothing . I could hear the storm rumbling in the distance and the trees swaying with the wind.

It was late in the evening when Tris returned from work at the cafe. She was soaked from head to toe and looked to be trembling due to the cold.

“Tris you should have take an umbrella” I said while looking at her cold form. “You knew the weather was going to be like this” I continued trying to glare at her which I’m sure resembled a puppy rather than the authoritative voice I was aiming for.

“ You know how am.” She chuckled under her breath. She clearly did not take me seriously. “ I thought I would be back before it rained but since Jonathan is gone I had to take over his shift which ended with me being caught in the rain”

I shaked my head disapprovingly at her. “Did you at least bring dinner?” I asked , we had an unspoken rule of eating takeout every Friday and since she was working today she was responsible for getting it today.

“Oh crap I forgot.” She said removing her wet jacket and boots leaving them on the corner of the door. “ I was so focused on getting home and Mbali’s backside that I forgot.” She sighed placing her tote bag on the kitchen counter.

“ I can’t believe you forgot dinner because you were busy ogling at her!” I exclaimed although quite lay because I was incapable of being loud. “Tris you need to ask her out then maybe you’ll stop forgetting to bring dinner”

Tris was lesbian and although she has not been in a lot of relationships she has been crushing on a girl called Mbali who worked as a barista at the cafe for the past year. Mbali had been open about being bisexual to me and Tris so it was not the situation where Tris was trying to figure out whether Mbali was attracted to the same sex.

“You know how I get when I like someone” She said with a put on her face.

I looked at my friend before standing up and going into my bedroom to get my purse and an umbrella. I returned to her still standing in kitchen.

“ Go shower before you give yourself a cold” I told her as I reached the door handle of our apartment. “I’m going to go to the drive-thru down the street I’ll be back”

I left the apartment and walked down the busy street. People were going out or going home. The rain despite having an umbrella was making my shoes wet. I was about to turn to the road leading to the drive-thru when I was grabbed from the side.

I struggled kicking and flailing to get out of this mans grimy rough hands. He had his hands clamping hard on my ribs. At this point I’m panicking. Out of instinct I elbow him on his face and momentarily he lets and and I take my chance and I run.

I did not stop running down the chaotic street ,I was too hurt and scared . I could feel my heart constricting in my chest as I forced my legs to run faster.I had no idea where I was heading but I knew that I could not look back.

***

I did not know my current location,everything around me was unfamiliar . The sky was dark and that made me aware of how long I ran and the fact that my body no longer able to hold itself up .I could feel my eyelids dropping with exhaustion.The sound of an engine shutting down brought back my fear and the slamming of a car door had all the oxygen in my body rushing resulting with me being unable to breath.

Large calloused hands gripped my shaking body before picking up and pulling me into a hard warm chest .The smell of the earth after it rains surrounded me consuming my very being as I tried to get as close to the source of warmth as humanly possible but body would not stop shaking .It was no longer the cold I was just scared .Scared of what my future holds ,of what this stranger intended to do to my vulnerable self.

My eyes were about to close shut when the deep husky sound of the strangers voice whispered gently in my ear ,immediately calming my accelerating heart as I focused on the sound of his voice.

"Breathe . You are safe mi amor precioso"

Amberia