Chapter five: Carmella

Author: Just a heads up if any of you are watching White Collar there is a spoiler about the TV show. I will tell you what part to skip but if your not watching just don't mind the skip.

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I don't completely hate lobster but I by no means love it. There's only one part of the lobster I like and that's the leg. No, not the claws, the legs. The legs have just the right amount of meat in them. Not too much, not too little. I once tried a big piece of lobster and about threw up. It was squishy and the texture was horrendous. And that's when I decided I liked the legs and I was ok with that.

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My period started yesterday and it's killing me. On the first day of my period I'm always in the worst pain ever. I swear if cramps could kill I would have been dead a long time ago. I'm a stubborn ass and hate taking medicine so I usually wait until I'm quite literally about to burst into tears. Till I take pain killers.

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It's already 1:00 p.m. and I have yet to get up well except to go to the bathroom. I've spent the entire day reading and annotating Every Summer After by Carley Fortune. Their friendship is freaking adorable. I haven't touched my phone so when I pick it up I'm not surprised there are over twenty texts though they are not who I was expecting them to be from.

10:57a.m.

Unknown number: Are you ok?

10:58a.m.

Unknown number: Carmella? You alive?

Unknown number: Are you hurt?

10:59-11:05a.m.

*five missed calls from unknown number*

Unknown number: Oh shit, you don't even know who this is. Hey, it's Royal. I kinda stalked your Facebook and found your number you gave to someone who asked in your comment. Which I mean kind of a dumb move if you ask me. Please answer me.

Unknown number: If I were to use my key to open the door would that be breaking and entering I mean, it is my cottage or is it yours because you're renting it?

11:05-11:07a.m.

Unknown number: We're not gonna do that, I don't need to go to jail.

Unknown number: Could you please answer me. If you're ignoring me on purpose could you please just send an exclamation mark or something so I know you're not dead in there.

11:32a.m.

Unknown number: Carmella please answer me.

11:45a.m.

Unknown number: For the love of sweet baby Jesus could you pretty please with a cherry on top answer your phone.

11:50a.m.

*Seven missed calls from unknown number*

12:34-12:39p.m.

Unknown number: Carmel please just answer.

Unknown number: I might start throwing rocks at your window.

Unknown number: Trash that windows are expensive. I don't need to pay for those.

12:39-1:00p.m.

Unknown number: You've been inside all day you sure you're not dead?

Unknown number: Oh god, you probably are and now you're stinking up my house. Thanks.

1:05p.m.

Unknown number: All jokes aside, are you ok?

Me: Hey Royal, yeah I'm fine sorry for worrying you. Period kinda hitting me hard today. And yes I do believe that's still breaking and entering though don't quote me on that I'm not 100% sure.

Unknown number: Oh thank god you're not dead I don't think I could stomach it.

Me: wow, not even concerned that I'm dead. Just concerned that you might throw up.

Unknown number: Apple I don't think I could stomach seeing you dead. Though I am concerned that I would throw up.

Unknown number: Btw what's your favorite drink/snacks/candy.

Me: Why?

Unknown number: Just answer the question.

Me: Favorite drink Moxie I don't know if you guys have that so if you don't, root beer. Snack probably Funyuns, nachos not with like the yellow melted gooey cheese but like the ones you put the chips on a plate with shredded cheese then put it in the microwave. Pretzels with peanut and chocolate chips. And Oh.My.Goodness. WATERMELON And the candy definitely Sour Patch Kids and Butter Fingers.

Unknown number: I'll be over in 20.

Me: 20 what hours? cats? dogs?

Unknown number: 20 minutes dummy, make sure your door is unlocked. Be there soon.

Me: Okie dokie.

I scurry off my couch and unlock the door. While I'm up I grab a glass of water and go back to the couch. I turn on my favorite comfort tv show.

About forty minutes later Royal or I at least hope its Royal knocks on my door.

"Come in." I holler.

"Ok so I had to go to five different stores when finally the town over had a gas station and they had Moxie. Yeah by the way, this shit is horrible. It's like off-brand root beer."

"You went to five different places to get Moxie?"

"Yeah?..."

"You dummy, I said you could just get root beer if you couldn't find it." I say not able to hold back my smile.

"Is that our new nicknames? Dummy one and Dummy two. Like the new Thing one and Thing two."

"What, you're going to shrink four feet dye your hair blue, get plastic surgery and wear a full body sweater."

"No Apple, we're the new and improved Thing one and Thing two. We're human and not whatever the hell they were."

"Anyways, what do you want first?"

"Watermelon please."

"Ok, take two of these." he says before throwing me a container of Tylenol.

"Do you like them cut into triangles or the diced cube things?" He hollers from the kitchen

He did not just ask me that. Goodness this man.

"Cubes please." I turn my focus back to the tv and relax into my comfort characters. He reappears from the kitchen a few minutes later holding a huge bowl of watermelon and a glass of Moxie.

"I swear to god you are the best and worst thing that has ever happened to me."

"The best and the worst?"

"I said what I said and I stand by it."

He comes and places the bowl of watermelon in my lap then sits down beside me practically dragging my legs over his lap.

"What we watching?"

"White collar." I say shoveling the watermelon into my face.

"What's it about?"

(Skip for no spoilers)

"Basically there's this guy who's a con man and this other guy who is an FBI agent so the con man breaks out of jail five months before his four year sentence is up. Because his girlfriend showed up to the jail and was like toodles I'm leaving. And so he broke out and she is really smart. And so they had like a meeting spot or something I don't remember. So he goes to that place and finds a wine bottle there and that's when the FBI person shows up and whisks him away back to prison. But not before the con man finds something on the FBI's shirt and is like do you know what this is and he's like no but I assume you do. And he's like duh and tells the FBI what it is. And then he makes some calls and is like damn the con man was right so he shows up at the prison because that was the agreement if the con man was right. And so the con man has a proposition and is like I'll help you with cases and wear an ankle bracelet for the next four years under your supervision. Because he got sentenced to another four years after breaking out.

So the FBI person is like no at first and then gives in so now the con man has a two mile radius and so he helps the FBI with cases while still doing con man stuff with his best friend Mozzie. Who's like a really superstitious smart ass. And so the FBI guy and the con man become really close friends but the con man keeps breaking the FBI guys trust. So the con man still has a whole bunch more secrets that he's not telling the FBI guy then they are sent undercover together with one of the con man guys like enemies. And so the FBI guy's wife is prego and there like fifty I mean no jugement. So they go undercover and Mozzie, the con man's best friend takes some of the money for him, Neal who is the con man and the enemy.

So at the end of all this the enemy goes to collect his money and there he shoots Neal and runs off with the money. But the FBI guy is like right there so he's like gonna get caught. But then the enemy sees the FBI and is like oh shit so he takes this random girl and holds the gun or knife. I think it was a knife or maybe it was a gun I don't know. But basically put the girl in harm. Then the enemy started talking about how Neals dying in this dark underground looking thing. So the FBI guy is like well shit what do I do? That's my best friend bleeding out and I could save him or I could let a murder go.

And then some other FBI shows up and shoots the enemy and so the FBI guy takes off spiriting to Neal and gets there and he's bleeding out on the ground and so an ambulance comes and puts Neal on a stretcher and they go to the hospital and he dies. And so they ask to see the body, FBI guy and Mozzie and Mozzie is like that, not him like he can't be dead. And the FBI guy is like that's him he's dead. And so the FBI guy has his baby and they name him Neal that literally broke my heart. Somewhere in the FBI guy's memory he remembers this thing that Neal was doing and it basically leads him to this shipping warehouse so he has the key to the one Neal had. So he opens the Neals shipping container and guess what?"

"What?" He says sounding as excited as I am.

"The mother fuckers not dead! He had all this stuff and had already guessed that the enemy was going to try and kill him and took something from a puffer fish or some shit and then he was living happily ever after without any of his friends.

"Well that's depressing."

"I know right! Just left his best friend thinking he died."

"I thought the FBI guy knew he's not dead?"

"He does! But poor little Mozzie doesn't!"

"OH NO MOZZIE!!"

"I KNOW THE POOR SON OF A BITCH!"

(Ok, your good)

"Can I grab a bite of that watermelon?"

"Hmmm... I don't usually share but since you went out of your way to get me things I guess you can have one." I take a piece of the watermelon and hold it out for him. Instead of taking the watermelon out of my hand this man practically eats my fingers with it. I feel his tongue flick between my two fingers, taking the watermelon.

"You're crazy." I say, whipping my fingers on his shirt.

"Ok, favorite color?" he asks.

"What?"

"What's your favorite color?"

"Why?"

"Just want to get to know my friend a little better."

"Are we friends?"

"Well, we're not not friends, and we're not strangers. So friends."

"My favorite color is dusty rose pink. What about you?"

"Off white."

"Off white?"

"That is what I said."

"How can your favorite color be 'off white'? Is that even a color?"

"Yes, it's a color."

"No, I refuse to believe that your favorite color is off white?"

"Ok then what's my favorite color?"

"Gold."

"Gold?"

"Yep."

"So a nasty yellow."

"No gold when it's all shiny."

"No, pick again."

"How about like a lilac gray? God you would look so fucking fine in a purple sweatshirt."

"Lilac gray it is."

"Ok, are you closer to your mom or dad?"

"Did you forget the part when we were talking on the beach and I told you I moved here because my mom was sick and my dad wanted her last few months to be somewhere she enjoyed."

"No I remember all that, but that still doesn't mean you're not closer to her than your dad."

"Yeah then I guess I was closer to my mom, she knew me inside and out. She knew when to butt in to stuff when to make me laugh when I just needed a hug or a good cry. My dad still doesn't even know what I like to read even though I've read for almost eleven years."

"Wow opposites. Huge dad girl, I would literally sell my soul for him."

"What about your mom?"

"She's nice, I just don't like her."

"What do you mean you don't like her?"

"I just don't like her. There are some things that I remember her doing and they would make me want to cringe. I always hated hugs from her. Throughout middle school I struggled with mental health issues. And she always made me feel like I had to lie that I was ok like the 'therapy' I was going to help. And she always blamed school for everything and was like yay now you're out of school no more depression. While my twelve year old ass was like yay trying to hold on through the whole summer.

She would always make me go on walks and make me feel less than my brother. She would say things like you're not your brother so they shouldn't judge your skill level based on him. Which I know doesn't sound mean but we were talking about school and how I wasn't getting as good grades as him. And Charlie would always make comments like 'I'm surprised you don't have bed sores yet.' I was genuinely depressed. I had no motivation to get out of bed and do anything. So him saying stuff like that would make me feel like shit. And I had a great relationship with him just because I loved him so much that I overlooked those comments. Looking back it pisses me off that they ever said anything like that knowing I was struggling."

"I'm sorry Carmella."

"It's whatever, all in the past."

"Some past things can reck future things."

"Yeah these ones never have."

"You and him still close?"

"Not at all. When we were younger I used to sleep in his room for at least five years. And we always stayed close. But we do have a five year age gap. So he graduated when I was going into eighth grade. We have cousins in Maryland and they have a boy. Well man now they have a son who's Charlie's age and once a year for a week one of them would fly down to the others to stay the week then fly home. Charlie and Tyson always talked about Ty coming up and living with us while he went to college in Maine so obviously he moved in the summer after they both graduated. Not that anyone cared about how I was going to feel having a whole ass other person in the house. Which I was by no means happy about.

I had Charlie for thirteen years of my life and that year Charlie got a girlfriend in over four years which was a bit of an adjustment, because he wasn't home as much and she was always at our house. So I never really got much one on one time with my literal idol. Now there was this other teenage boy who lived with us and between Ty and the girlfriend it left no time for the little sister. After that I started distancing myself from him so it wasn't him leaving me it was me leaving him. And then I hit an all time low. I had to go on meds for the depression and tried to cut off my friends but I guess you need to go through a mental breakdown to figure out what friends are fake and what ones are real. Lost three kept four."

"What about you? I've been doing a lot of talking, mister, spill some beans."