It is called a crush because it will crush your heart

To love from afar without being loved back, millions experience this one sided love and it can be rather painful. What's even more painful is knowing that they will never love you and yet still clinging on to that false hope.

The story line Yu Yan sarcastically thought up couldn't be far from the truth, but it still isn't the whole truth. How long does it take until someone gets tired of the stone faced person, moving on to find someone they can have a better chance at? To tell the truth, you don't get tired of the person you have a crush on, you simply have a change of mind and look through new lenses. It takes a single realization to turn your whole world upside down really.

Nothing revolves around one person and even Yu Yan knew that. Even if she did have a crush on Feng Mian, she longed since gave up when she realized that she had no chances with him. Who cares about the saying, "Never give up." The only people who say are those who became successful when they've followed that saying. The millions of people who fail while never giving up, are never mentioned at all, swallowed up by the light of the few people who have succeeded. Besides, what kind of person wants to admit their failure when they've done all they could? In the end, they would only be faced with criticism about how they didn't try hard enough.

Though, the mind can't win every battle. From time to time, her heart would skip a beat when they accidentally make eye contact, and her smile tethered on the edge of a frown when she sees him smile fondly at Ting Xia.

One of humanity's greatest desire is to feel treasured and special. That was most likely one of the reasons everyone daydreams about being 'the one'. The one to put an end to a play boy's antics, melt the cold heart of the ice queen. Be the one to put the schemer to sleep, make the uncaring man care only for you.

Yu Yan continued to smile under the pressure of many of her classmate's gazes. Perhaps she has gotten used to it, but it still made her uncomfortable thinking about how every single one of her movements were being observed so thoroughly. What made it worse what that there were more people stealthily catching glances at her today. Even Ting Xia, Huang Qianru and Feng Mian stole a glance at her with a contemplative look.

'Please stop looking at me, I won't become ugly all of a sudden just because you want me to,' Yu Yan wanted to tell them. Didn't they know by now that there was nothing more to me than my face? Why pay attention to me all of a sudden? Aren't you all supposed to be paying attention to Ting Xia and Huang Qianru and the drama they might create later on? Maybe even stare at Feng Mian to admire how perfectly he sits?

After class was over, Yu Yan got ready as slow as possible, hoping to be able to hear something that might explain why people were looking at her with contempt and thoughtful gazes. If she was lucky, which she never was, then someone would just go up to her and tell her what was going on straight up to her face. Of course, that would never happen in a place where directness is a form of rudeness.

"I would never have realized that Yu Yan is this sneaky," Yu Yan continued on slowly so that she could catch the full conversation.

"Her kind facade has finally fallen, hasn't it? I can't believe that we were fooled for such a long time!"

If there was one thing Yu Yan had confidence in, it was my mask. The mask she had had worn for a long as she could remember. Years upon years, she had gently formed this mask with love and care. Although she knew that it could fall apart at any moment, such was its delicateness, she had taken care of it to the best of her abilities. At this point in her life, it is near impossible for it to crumble and fall.

This must be another rumor, a rumor that just struck too close to home. But rumors are nothing without evidence, as long as you can prove them wrong then everything will go back to as it was.

"To think that she is foolish enough to think that Feng Mian would ever love such a scheming woman such as her, there must be something wrong with her brain!"

When Yu Yan heard this, she exited the room as she now knew exactly what was going on. Though, she wanted to say, 'and you think he would love such a cruel person such as you? At least I don't help spread smoke when I see it.'

'Do they really think that I was stupid? That I exchanged intelligence for useless kindness? I am not the fisherman who would benefit from the fight between the snipe and clam. Do you know Feng Mian? He is the type of person that would only let one person in his heart. He would stay loyal to her no matter what happens to her, whether she died or even if she cheated on him.'

His loyalty would scare the very heavens themselves and make the gods bow to him in respect. You think I have a chance to get in between them? They must be dreaming! Sadly, while they were stuck dreaming, I was stuck facing reality. While dreams are temporary reality is forever, a nightmare that Yu Yan could never escape from.