Turbulence

Tears both his and hers, exhaust her. Seo mourns the future that he couldn't stop from coming to pass, lives he wouldn't be able to save. He mourns the Queen's suffering that he wouldn't be able to ease - and the burden of knowledge that he couldn't share with anybody else. Seol weeps for him, for the ache that she is unable to soothe, for the pain that is beyond her comprehension. With all her pure, simple heart, she grieves for his grief.

Seo isn't certain of the exact moment when Seol's eyes had fluttered shut, giving into the sleep that weighed them. He watches her with a particular expression, raising a hand to trail a finger along her forehead - brushing away the feathery locks that had escaped her elaborate hairdo. She doesn't stir.

Trust of hers is his undoing. She is willfully ignorant of how vulnerable, open to ridicule and stigma her position is by his association. How small of a misstep it takes to lose a reputation. Still, she falls asleep in his arms, as trusting as a nestling of its nest. Seo swallows thickly.

Her heart is about to break and greedily he hopes he could delay it a little while longer. Petulantly, he hopes that it would not be a beginning of an end. It is a game he must teach her to play, to whatever ends that may come. It is also a game that he had obtusely hoped to keep her from entering - for its stakes will ruin the essence of hers.

"General," an incessant voice urges from the shadows. He doesn't turn towards it. "We don't have time. If the princess is discovered here -"

"The princess will decide."

"General - it's not the wisest…"

"Mama?" He calls her gently, tapping on her cheek. "Gongjunim mama?"

Bleary-eyes crack open. Seol watches him blankly for a moment before pulling herself upright.

"How many of your retinue know you are here?" Seo asks her slowly, allowing her all the time to gather herself to answer.

"No one. Why?" Her voice is small, sleepy. Her nose is still blocked from all the crying. After a moment her expression stiffens. "Seo - something moved in the shadows." She clutches hold of his sleeve as she mutters.

Seo shakes his head.

"That's a friend who prefers to remain in the shadows. Gongjunim, your retinue is compromised and infiltrated with spies."

"What?"

"Their masters know you are here. As of this moment -"

"General!" The voice cuts in and Seol jumps. Seo grabs hold of her hands in his and squeezes, and continues as if the shadow had not spoken.

"As of this moment the entire court knows. Mama, they are going to question your virtue."

"I need to leave," she makes a moment to spring into motion."I cannot be discovered here. They will accuse you of seducing me. Those leeches have been fishing for an opportunity since forever!"

Seo holds her by the wrist, pulling her back.

"You can't leave. It's too late." He sounds too calm for the words he utter.

"No! No - I won't let them -" she pauses mid sentence and stares at him. "You think I deserve this - don't you? You think I brought this upon myself. This - this was what you were trying to explain. And you won't stop them from pinning the blame on you. No - they can't take you away from me. No - I won't let them -"

"Nothing will happen."

Her eyes widen.

"How?"

"It's a choice you have to make, mama. Think of this as a game of chess. You have been cornered. To break the formation around you a sacrifice is required."

"You could pin the blame on me or on the witness they bring. It will be someone from your retinue that you cherish -"

"What will happen to them?"

Seo's mouth twitches. She doesn't even consider the possibility of letting him go down.

"They die." Her hands in his hold start to tremble. "I'm telling this now to make you prepare yourself. Because once you take up a position you stand on it. You stand firmly. Nothing gets you killed faster than indecisiveness. No matter what pawn they tempt you with - no matter how much your heart aches - you don't change your word."

"This isn't a game, Kang Seo."

"This is the court mama. Everything here is a game. You are only beginning to see the stakes."

"General!" The voice insists.

" Take a decision mama. Make a stand. I would abide by anything you command."

"Save yourself."

Seo's smile in reply is bitter. Even if he had known, or guessed her reply beforehand, he still takes no pleasure in hearing it.

"Then you shall see the consequences of choosing me, mama. I'm afraid you will not savor them." Seo drags gentle fingers along her hair, tucking where the strands had come loose. "They will drag you in whatever state they find you," he continues as he fixes her hair. "But they can't take away what you don't allow them to. Remember - you are the first princess. You bow to none but his imperial majesty."

"Kang Seo, why does this sound like a farewell?"

He sighs, touches a palm to her cheek as if she's a child.

"Because one way or the other, we are going to lose who we were, mama."

"No - no, they can't -"

"I need to go. They are coming."

He backs away without another word and as she watches melts into the shadows. The nagging voice too is gone.

*

"And where exactly did you find her highness?" The minister is elated, knowing full well the answer to the question he pauses to her ladies. Yong is red in the face - sometimes he still struggles to maintain his court face. Seol cannot raise her head to look at her imperial father. That minister, who she recognizes as one from the two badmouthing Seo the other day surveys her with a sleazy sneer.

"No need to circumvent," Seol is startled when Seo speaks from somewhere behind her. He doesn't even look at her as he walks past, silver eyes branding upon the minister in question. "I shall answer your inquiries Minister, her highness the first princess was at my personal residence."

A murmur raises at that, courtiers discussing the development until the emperor raises a hand, his face hard.

"Let him continue."

"Your benevolence is immeasurable Pyeha," Seo bows briefly, before turning on the minister. "Was that not what your moles have reported back to you? Yes, her highness was at my personal residence. It serves to prove how despicable your thoughts are if you'd question a ward's virtue to be found in her guardian's residence."

"Nice of you to point out General Kang," the minister gathers himself. "Not every ward is a princess of first rank and not every guardian is a -" He pauses, coming up short when Seo's silver eyes narrow. "- man of questionable origins. And my witness is the princess's lady in waiting…" he splays a hand to indicate the young court lady who stands trembling in her shoes. Seo barely looks at the woman, she has her head ducked. "She has given us an immaculate account of each movement made by the princess - from the unauthorized visit on the evening of your return, rendezvous by the brook this morning and later - covert - meeting at your personal residence."

"Listen to yourself," Yong chuckles. "Two people who spent months in the mountains of Shinju needs to have their rendezvous in the capital itself?"

"Let me add what the immaculate account of your agent has omitted," Seo says breezily. "Gongjunim mama went out with her brother, the crown prince on that evening in question."

"And I vouch for that."

"Yun wangjanim was the one playing in the brook, we were merely accompanying him in the spirit of the festival. There are witnesses from the imperial guard to the same. At my personal residence -" he pauses. "I was not with her highness."