Look On Blindly

"An army, you say? How many of them?" Emperor Guan Hong asked, his voice grim.

"Ten thousand at least." Jin Yue answered.

"Ten thousand?" The Emperor repeated. He turned to the envoy. "Are these the men your scouts saw in the east?"

Cupping his sleeves, the envoy nodded. "From what is described, they sound similar. Our men learned they are a foreign clan allied with the An Clan."

There was a silence then, and one could feel the tightness in the air around them. Standing in the back, An Sun's fists clenched behind him.

Jin Yue continued to report her observations. "But, though I could not see what was happening from afar, I believe that they have settled camp somewhere close near the city."

"If that's true, they'll attack by nightfall." General Donghai chimed in, his disfigured mouth curling into a snarl. "We should gather our strongest armies there and fight them head first!"

Rin nodded her head. "I agree. It will help us draw them away from the citizens. We must not delay."

The Emperor was silent, standing in front of everyone. When all eyes of apprehension had turned toward him, his eyes turned determined.

"Ten thousand men or not, we must fight. The men of the Bai, the Yun, and West, must ride forth today with axe, sword, and bow."

Rin's bright eyes moved to rest on the Emperor's. She couldn't help but smile.

...

"No. You're staying here with the citizens and Yun Suyin. Someone needs to keep an eye on her." Rin said, adjusting her saddlebag across a shoulder.

"It's not my fault she followed me here!" Aiguo followed her as she walked to her horse. "Didn't you say I could help here? Even you said I grew stronger! So, why can't I go with you?"

Turning, Rin sighed softly. She set a hand on his shoulder. "I know you are strong. But this is too dangerous for you to come. I can't guarantee I can protect you."

"I can protect myself!" Aiguo retorted, more abruptly than he wanted to. "If I have to stay here then...I'm just going to follow you!"

"Aiguo." Her face had gone cold as he spoke.

"Please. Trust me. I can do it." In a low hesitating voice, Aiguo began again, and slowly his words grew clearer and firmer. "I know you're scared. But you can't teach me to be strong if you shelter me from everything. You have to let me explore and experience my own battles."

Her lips pressed together. She regarded him for a moment, then made a low noise of frustration. Her gaze lifted to meet his. It was stern.

"This will not be like before. As hard as I will try, I may not be there to protect you. Whatever happens, run to safety. If you have no other choice...then you fight for your life. Do you understand?"

Aiguo's heart leaped. The severity in her tone shocked him. But he was not about to back down. He nodded his head.

"All right. Then go get into some armor." She said and mounted her horse.

As she watched the boy speed away, her hands clutching the reins tightened.

"You're letting him come?" A lighthearted voice approached her.

Rin turned. On his horse, Manchu's pair of blue eyes stared back at her. They seemed to be constantly smiling.

"He was right with what he said." She said softly. "I am scared. There are times where I wish I could predict the future...but such a thing is impossible. All I can hope is to keep him away from the danger."

"But the more you push him away, the more he will chase you. Is that not more dangerous?" Manchu pointed out lightly.

"Yes. I realize that now. It doesn't help with how persistent he is." Rin sighed, seemingly annoyed by this fact.

"He's not the only persistent person you know." Manchu was smiling, inviting her to laugh as if they were two mischievous children.

But she did not. Rather, her expression became sullen. She hesitated then asked, "Sir Manchu, we're considered friends, right?"

Manchu glanced at her, surprised to hear such a question. He tilted his head in thought. "Hmm. I was thinking of us as more like acquaintances. But friends are nice too."

Ignoring his teasing, Rin pursed her lips. "Has Sun said anything to you recently?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Since the lantern festival, he has seemed different. Distant almost. I can't help but feel as if he is not telling me something."

After speaking, she watched Manchu. His calloused hands on the reins twitched slightly. He scratched his forehead.

"Not that I recall. Maybe you two should speak to each other about it." His voice was composed.

Keeping her voice as even as his, Rin smiled. "I see. Well, in that case, the two of us can return to being acquaintances."

"A pity." He sighed mockingly.

She smiled and pulled her reins to turn before strolling away. Manchu watched her figure disappear, his light expression vanishing.

"That idiot." He grumbled.

...

On the other side of the gate, An Sun swiftly buckled on his armor, pulling cinches of tightening belts. He grabbed his sword and stopped for a moment. He stared at it with darkened eyes.

"A-An Sun." A fragile, sweet voice had called out to him.

Among the bustling of men in armor passing by and gearing up, a girl stood, her pale skirt swaying around her slender hips. Yun Suyin held her hands to her chest and nervously approached.

"Please be safe." She said, almost in a whisper.

An Sun frowned and turned his back. "You shouldn't be here." He said while walking away.

Yun Suyin's lips pressed, and she chased after him, averting the men walking past. "I-I know but...I had wanted to wish you well before you left."

"I don't need it." He put on his cuffs. "You should go seek shelter with the women and children."

"An Sun..." She clutched his arm like a child.

He looked down and wrenched her hand away in disgust.

"Yun Suyin." His voice was thick with barely restrained anger. "My patience is very thin. Have you not learned from the last time?"

Recognizing her mistake, the girl took a step back. She clutched her hands to suppress the trembling in her body.

"I do not expect you to believe me...but I have changed. I understand now that back then, I was foolish. I shouldn't have disgraced you nor myself. While I did come here for you, I also came here for myself. So...I want you to see me make a change."

His eyes bore down on her. The girl was shaking like a leaf against the wind. She looked pitiful yet beautiful against the murky world around her. But whether she was charming or willing to change, he had no interest.

"If you wish to change, then so be it. But do not expect me to care for you. I have said it once, and I will say it again. I do not want anything to do with you."

Yun Suyin stared at him, straight as a spear stabbing the sky. She could not find the words that would reach him. Perhaps there were none. Yet, still, her mind scrabbled in its corners, desperate, hoping to find the thing that might soften him.

But even this she knew was impossible.

With no other words, she bowed her head. Her cheeks flowered with tears unending, like water over rocks in a river. Whether he was gone or not, she could not see.

The sun was already drawing near the hills upon the west of the palace when at last Rin, An Sun, and their companions rode out.

As the gates slowly closed, Yun Suyin stood still as stone, her hands clenched at her sides, and she watched them until they passed into the sunset. When they were lost to view, she turned, stumbling as one that is blind, and went back to her lodging.