If you tell me your name...

It had been a few weeks since school started, the summer was getting weaker and weaker to give way to autumn.

It was one of those days when the sun still seemed to split the earth. Lucas went to the park  after lunch. As usual he had his headphones and his notebook, where he drew sketches of landscapes, faces or simply imaginary scenes that came to his mind.

When he arrived at the park he had a hard time finding a free spot where he could lie down quietly without worrying about prying eyes or unwanted onlookers. He was nervous about anyone watching him while he was drawing. 

He finally found one, a huge clearing with a single tree in the middle, and to his delight it was a jacaranda, something he was eager to draw that day. In front of him there was only a couple sunbathing, and behind him, duly distant, a group of young people playing. He turned his eyes there again, he seemed to have recognized someone... and indeed it was him, the boy with the green eyes. He was joking with a classmate, who had said something to him while he was laughing his head off. He threw some cards in his face to lie down on the grass. His torso was bare and his skin was a soft golden color. He was wearing a pair of low rise pants that had slipped down to reveal the edge of his underwear. He was surprised to see that even there the young man's skin had also that golden color. His mind began to bring up all those questions he shouldn't be asking himself, but he couldn't help it. He wondered what the young man's skin would smell like, what it would be like  to run his tongue along that path from the navel to down there, gently nibbling on that skin.

Something in his crotch began to come alive, he instinctively lowered his head, if he didn't stop thinking about it, it would end very badly.

He looked at the tree again, how can I draw the damn tree now, he thought.

  His mind kept coming back to that body. It occurred to him that he could draw it from memory, but it was not the same, what he would like to do is to make a portrait of the naked young man and hang it in his room. Of course, then he thought about the fact that he didn't live alone and what his sister would say if she saw something like that on his bedroom wall.

He put on his headphones, fixed his eyes on the tree and ignored (or at least tried to) all those fantasies he couldn't help having. For a moment he wanted to get up and run away. No, he already run away enough, the best thing would be to stay there. Maybe he would even say hello to him.

He was thinking about this with his eyes closed when a shadow forced him to open his eyes, before he had time to react a familiar voice came to him.

"I knew you were here."

In front of him was Manon, dressed as a woman as he would say, something that surprised him, she was wearing shoes, skirt and blouse.

"Say something!"

"What did you dress up as?"

He knew what was coming, so he gathered his legs quickly, he was sure to get a kick out of it. But she remained calm with a faint smile.

"I want to talk to you, but you've been dodging me lately," she said, her face showing concern."

"Don't feel like talking... seriously, don't take this the wrong way, but..."

A voice interrupted them

"Hey!"

They both turned around, a young man with a bare torso and bright green eyes was in front of them, smiling. Lucas' heart thumped hard in his chest, he was behaving like a kid, he was just a guy, nothing more.

"Hey, are you a classmate?"Manon, who already knew her brother, hurried to ask.

"No, no way! I'm from social studies."

Lucas just nodded his head silently.

"How about your classmates? They're not very well known, they're a bit of assholes." commented the green eyed guy.

Lucas smiled, how right he was!

"If it wasn't for the fact that social studies doesn't appeal to me at all, I would have asked for a change."

"Too bad you got in this year, otherwise you could have opted for Arts," he replied as he looked Lucas' notebook.

"They are only sketches. Lines, and little else. I don't like to show them until they are ready. I'm sorry. " He quickly closed the notebook and put it aside.

Manon smiled at that young and nice guy.

"My name is Manon and as you may have noticed, I am his sister."

"Unfortunately..." Lucas added softly.

The young woman was openly angry, but inside she was happy, from time to time Lucas was back to his old self.

"And you, what is your name?"

"Numa"

"What an unusual name...it sounds pretty."

"Thank you!"

"Well, Numa, the little madman you see over there is called Lucas," his brother smiled shyly, "I have to go, I was just coming by to say hello. "He turned to his brother and said, "See you at home."

Once she left, Numa took the initiative.

"We're playing cards. Wanna join us?"

He accepted, hoping that the boys would get tired and leave them alone.

Two other students were anxiously waiting for them, both wanted to know who the girl was, how old she was, if she had a boyfriend and where she was going to dance. 

"I'm sorry guys, but my sister likes older ones."

"Numa, say something... she's beautiful, isn't she," the other young man added knowingly.

"Come on, now that your girlfriend is not here, you can say whatever you want!"

Numa smiled, amused.

Lucas saw him blushing and felt anxious and sad, so it was true, he had a girlfriend.

He looked up a little embarrassed. Lucas couldn't stop looking at his mouth, it was perfect. He shook his head, he was going to go crazy. The word "girlfriend", came back to his mind, knocking down his emotions all at once, and proving to have a better effect than a bucket of cold water.

"Lucas, come down from the clouds," shouted one of the boys, "do you have a girlfriend?"

"What a question," added the second one, "If a guy like him doesn't have a girlfriend, what's left for us!"

"I do, but she stayed in Italy."

It wasn't a lie at all, they had had a short relationship and he had stayed there in Milano.

The afternoon passed quickly. By the time they realized it, the sun had gone down, giving way to the coolness of the night, which was already making itself felt. Numa put on his T-shirt, he could tell he was freezing, he was about to offer him his jacket but thought it would not look very good.

The other two young men left for their homes, Numa and Lucas met half way so they decided to go by walk. There was something about the young man that inspired enormous trust in him and he didn't know what it was. On the other hand, he was the typical boy that everybody liked, sweet, simple, and attentive, but there was something else, something that he could not define and that already captured his interest.

"Do you have any finished drawings?" asked Numa

"A few, at home."

"I'd like to see them, when are you going to show them to me?"

"When I find them. After moving, I don't know where I stored them."

"Don't forget, eh?"

"Do you like Arts that much?"

"I should have followed that but I realized too late that I liked it."

It was time to say goodbye.

Lucas stood there for a moment with the memory of his sparkling eyes, he was perfect. "Very good Lucas" he thought sadly, you have done very well, start repeating stories.

Some memories came to his mind, his eyes watered for a moment infuriating him. For feeling weak and for that pain and for those memories that followed him wherever he went.

Is this how it is always gonna be?