chapter 47

I sighed. It was a big revelation.

"I feel. I feel so many feelings. I feel lonely, sad, happy and angry. I have emotions, just like you do"

"Do you cry?"

"I used to, but now I just hurt people who make me want to cry back." I nodded.

"Can you hurt me?" I asked, looking into his face. He pulled my cheeks and smiled. " Why would I hurt you? I'd rather protect you from those who want to"

I nodded. Of course he'd protect me.

"Do you wanna hear a story?"

"Yes"

"When I was fifteen, I was so lonely and depressed that I ran away from home. Dad left when I was still very young, because he was afraid of mom's superpowers. He thought she was a monster or something. She got hurt many times and became very weak as a result. She didn't have the ability to heal most of her injuries, both internal and external. She needed an alpha to heal and protect her, so I had to seek help outside, and eventually someone found her. She got mated to someone else. An alpha. I call him Father. I found out I was not a regular child when I was ten. You could have imagined the horror on my face when I displayed my powers and got terrified as a result. That was when I started contemplating running away and trying all means to be 'normal' "

"Hmmmm" I listened attentively

"Mom wanted me to accept my fate, and be excited that I could do things many people couldn't do, but it was terrifying. I told her I'd never accept it. Imagine having a fatal accident and when I got to the hospital, the doctors found out my bleeding stopped. It stopped while I was still on the stretcher. Mom told me I was going to be very very strong. But I was depressed, I wanted to live my normal life, get hurt and get treated, like every normal child. It wasn't because of anything other than it terrified me"

"I wasn't able to come to terms with it. So, because I wanted to live a normal life, I left home and came to the natural world, and there, I made many friends. I was so happy and free. I curbed my wolf so that my friends would not alienate me. I hid my identity so well and even worked as a delivery guy. Dated a few girls and lived life normally, but you know what, Ariana?"

"Hmmm what?"

"It caught up with me. My true identity caught up with me one day. I was not able to hide it for long because sooner than later, on one of my delivery days, someone offended me so greatly that I pounced on him and injured him. He was a huge man. He gymed, but he could not even fight me. I tried to curb my wolf but it let itself out, and almost killed him that day. I had to run home. My boss saw it, everyone else saw it. I didn't return to work the next day. I never did, and they never called me back or never were able, because I destroyed my cellphone too.

So, I decided to accept my personality and live with it. Because I had been hiding it, I had been cheated and hurt physically and emotionally by many regular humans. For years.

I decided to work in a school of superhumans. Enchanting Promises High School. And I have been there ever since. I only returned home when Father pleaded with me to visit, and because I found someone I'd love to see around everyday, someone I'd love to protect because she's so innocent"

"Who is that?" I wanted to be sure.

"You" he said. I laughed because it was both interesting and weird.

"Joe was meant for you but he messed it up. So, he made me promise him to do what he could have done if he didn't."

"Really?" It was both intriguing and painful to hear

"Yes"

"He said to not force you into the supernatural world if you don't want to. He's seen that you've bonded with your natural family. That's why I only bring you here once in a while, to feel good, and have fun. You don't feel like you belong here because you haven't lived here all your life"

"Yeah" I nodded. It was clearer now.

"I feel like I'll never get used to this life" I affirmed.

"You could, but it'll take a while. Stay wherever your heart is, Ariana. I can protect you from anywhere"

"I will" I said. He rubbed my hands again. I looked at the star. It was closer and larger now.

There was overwhelming silence for a while before I cut in. "I want you to do something for me"

"I want you to not hurt Maria, please"

"She'll hurt you if I don't stop her" he said. "If she lets the past go, I have no reason to hurt her"

"Then protect me. Isn't that what you're meant to do? Protect me from her attacks, but don't hurt her" I pleaded.

"I wish you could make her stop too" I said. He touched my eyes and said, "Do you feel like crying?"

"I don't want you to hurt her" I repeated, ignoring his question

" Do you feel like crying?" He asked again

I nodded slowly.

He touched my two eyes and I felt something break into two in both of them, and before I could do anything else, tears dropped down my face. Hot tears. I cried more as soon as I saw the tears roll down my cheeks to my chest.

"Cry all you want, but don't cry too much" he said. My tears were uncontrollable. The tears that had been held back for years poured in full measures then. It felt good to cry. It had never felt so good to cry. It was my first time crying. I was going to show mom this good news.

"Own your abilities. You didn't create yourself. Own your flaws, your awkwardness, your body, your feelings. Be you" he said. I cried more. It was so emotional. Thoughts about the past floated in my head.

He wrapped his arms around me and made us jump to the floor. Then, he walked me down to the end of the library where the largest bookshelf stood.

"Lift it" he said.

I stared at him, confused.

"Lift the bookshelf and take it to that side" he said pointing at another extreme. "Do it now"

I looked at the bookshelf. It was so wide and huge like a giant. It must be at least twice my size.

I touched the edge of the shelf with tears running down my cheeks and started to lift it, and just like that, it was floating and so I started to walk with it towards the side he pointed to. It was as if I was holding a ball of cotton. Very light.

After I dropped it, he clapped.