Chapter 48

Soobin stood frozen, astounded, unable to move until he felt the peck on his lips. With all of his strength, he shoved the guy away, causing him to crash on the ground. After slamming the door, he bolted to the washroom. The revulsion was so intense that he wished he could cut off his own lips. His hands were trembling so violently that he was struggling to turn on the tap. He pressed down hard on the liquid soap bottle, pumping out copious amounts and scrubbing his lips and face with an almost brutal force. He washed his entire face, rubbing with his full might until his skin turned red and raw. Still, he wasn't satisfied. He kept scrubbing the lower part of his face harder and faster. When he looked into the mirror, he saw only helplessness staring back at him. While fighting back tears, a lump formed in his throat. He raised his hand, watching them shaking uncontrollably. The self-loathing feeling came back to him as he didn't want to be afraid and fought desperately to stop trembling.

He looked back into the mirror and started breathing heavily. The more he was looking at himself, the more he was hating everything. The urge he felt to destroy everything, made him go furious. Everything was going smoothly. He should've seen it coming. He shouldn't have been greedy. To live a normal life, to enjoy when someone gives him hope. To see the glimpse of the light into his dark world. He shouldn't have. Feeling uncontrollable, he screamed at the top of his lungs and smacked in the mirror with his full strength and made it shattered. Blood came out from his fist as he got several cuts from the broken glass. Suddenly, he calmed down and retreated to his room. He sank to the floor while tears streaming down his face. Though he was alone in the room, he buried his face in his knees, clutching them tightly.

Time went by and he slowly calmed down. But he couldn't forget the filthy touch on his lips. He rushed to the washroom again and threw up though nothing came out except for liquids. His stomach was empty as he didn't get the chance to eat. Still, he felt the urge to throw up more. While making the strange and loud noises, he became weaker.

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In the long hallway of the hospital, a guy was sitting on the corner of a bench alone. His face was full of tension. He hid his face inside his palms as if he just finished praying. He sighed and leaned back onto the wall. The hospital's lights were very dim as it was nighttime. There were no other people waiting and he was left alone. He stood up and went towards the room where his wife was laid down. He looked at his wife through the window and sighed again.

"Dad! Here's some food to dine on." Yeonjun came towards him and showed him a food bag. He was talking with a very serious tone. He showed another bag and said again,

"And I also bought some fruits in case mom woke up and felt hungry. And you know you're stinking, so I bought some new clothes for you as well." Saying all this, he gave all of the bags except a small one to him. While taking the bag, he gave a dry smile to Yeonjun.

"Don't worry dad! Doctor said she'd be fine. She just needs a small surgery and I know she's very strong. I bet she's stronger than you. Oh! Do you wanna go home and rest? You can come to my house as it's closer from here." Yeonjun asked while checking the medicines he just bought whether any of them were missing from the prescription.

"I'll stay here tonight as well so you can go and get some rest." Yeonjun said in a lower voice as he was busy checking the meds.

"No, I'll stay beside her today. I know you work hard everyday and you didn't get any rest for these two days. So, you should go ahead. And thanks! I know she's strong and she'd be fine. It's just…I feel useless. I couldn't be a good husband, nor a good dad. I'm so sorry. Can you please forgive me for whatever I did to you? Your mom was begging me so hard these days to see you once. But, I didn't let her. What if…." He stopped and teared up.

"Shh!" Don't say anymore. I'm here now and I'll be. So, don't blame yourself too much. Yes, I'm still angry at you. But that wasn't mom's fault. So… I'll be right beside her." Yeonjun said and grinned to cheer his father up. In reply, he just nodded.

"Just go and get some sleep or else you'll become a panda." He patted Yeonjun's shoulder and moved away.

"Okay. I'll just go and hand them over to the nurse and then go home. Make sure to take a shower after eating. You won't want mom to find out that you haven't showered for days, right?" Yeonjun joked out and laughed in tiny. He felt joyous when his father made a joke on him.

"Hey! I just showered the day before yesterday! What do you mean by days?" He raised his voice as Yeonjun was getting away from him.

"Yeah yeah! Sure! As you said!" Yeonjun also raised his voice while walking away. His dad finally smiled and shook his head slowly as he was feeling proud of his son as well as thankful.

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Yeonjun reached his home and remembered his day. As he was busy taking care of his mom at the hospital, he completely forgot about Soobin. He didn't even get a chance to tell him to call. Did he go home safe earlier? What was he doing all day? Is he working right now? Yeonjun wondered. He totally forgot to call him after he parted from Soobin. As Soobin never initiated a call, Yeonjun thought it wasn't an issue that he didn't call him.

"How did it slip my mind? No matter how busy I was, I should've at least called him once. Argh!" Yeonjun was mad at himself. He took out his phone and rang Soobin up. Unfortunately, nobody answered the phone. Yeonjun called again as he knew it wasn't time for Soobin to get home yet.

"Is he that busy at work? Is she giving my boyfie a hard time?" Yeonjun mumbled. He thought Arin was over-exhausting Soobin by giving him workloads. He put his phone on his table and went to take a shower. When he stood beneath the waterfall, he closed his eyes and Soobin's face floated in front of him. His smile, his blushed face, everything was gorgeous. Even his angry face when he yelled at him, looked so fantastic. Suddenly, Yeonjun's heart started beating fast as he kept thinking about Soobin. He was yearning to see Soobin's face. As if he'd choke up if he won't see Soobin right then. Yeonjun turned off the tape and came out. He put on his clothes and took the phone again. He called Soobin again, but it was in vain. He went to the balcony while talking with one of his subordinates over the phone. At that time, he saw a man strolling around the next house where Soobin used to live with his granny. He seemed suspicious about it as he thought it might be a thief.

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"Hi! I never saw you around here before. Can I help you?" After Yeonjun came outside, he went to the man and asked. As Yeonjun was totally unfamiliar with the guy, he had no idea who the man could be. Actually, it was Soobin's former teacher who came to find him after he searched for him at his house and couldn't find him.

"Um…do you know where I can find the owner of this house? I am their relative and I want to meet them." He showed the little house and asked.

"Uh! The owner of this house? She passed away. And as for the other people, they didn't come here after she died. So, I'm sorry to say, but I think you can't meet them now." Yeonjun replied gently.

"Ah! Okay. Thanks!" Saying this, he walked away as Yeonjun stared at him suspiciously until he went far from his sight.

"Who the man could be? Should I ask Soobin? But, he won't receive my call. Maybe he's still angry at me. What should I do?" Yeonjun took out his phone again and called. Subconsciously, he went into the yard and started roaming around. He rang Arin up as he was getting mad at her. Arin answered his call and as soon as she took his call, he shouted,

"Hey! What do you think you're doing? Are you over-exhausting my darling?"

"Whoa whoa whoa! Calm down! I think you're the one that…anyway, what happened?" Arin replied.

"Where's Soobin? Put him on the call. I wanna talk with him." Yeonjun asked directly.

"He didn't come to work today. I was calling him all day and he didn't receive my call! So, I thought he was with you!" Arin replied surprisingly.

"No, he wasn't! Ah! Maybe I should go to his home now and see what's going on. Bye." Saying this Yeonjun hung up the call and rang Soobin up again.

As Yeonjun approached the house, he heard a ringtone coming from inside the dark building. He was astonished. To double-check, he ended the call and dialed again, noticing that the ringtone only sounded when he called Soobin.

Though he was uncertain, Yeonjun went to the door and was stunned to find it unlocked. Without hesitation, he entered the house and heard water running in the washroom. As he knew the layout of the house, he headed directly there. His heart was racing, though he couldn't pinpoint why he was so nervous.

He went to the bathroom and found the door wide open. When he stepped inside, he was completely flabbergasted by what he saw.

The water was still running, overflowing from the filled bathtub and draining away. Soobin's entire body, including his head, was submerged in the water, as if he was sleeping soundly in the tub.