Trying To Get Over It

I tried to lose myself in the work that Everett and I were doing. We were repairing the carburetor for a two thousand and three Chevy Silverado. It was tedious work but it needed to be done. And once that was over, we would be doing some major restorative body work on a salvaged nineteen sixty-eight Dodge Charger.

Right now, that car was a total wreck that wasn't worth anything at all. But by the time that me, Everett and Dad got done with it, the car was going to be a beauty that was worth a fortune. And it was going to be mine. This car was going to be my baby. It was going to be my future. And I couldn't wait.

By the time that this car was fully restored, it was going to be better than brand new. And it was going to be beautiful. This was what I wanted in life. This fully restored beauty that I saw in my head. Not some asshole that was going to be 'taking care of me' because I 'didn't belong in a garage'. Who the hell did that asshole think he was? Fuck him. Fuck him and all the other men out there that were just like him.

I already knew that I was going to be alone for life. I was most definitely not a lesbian so that route was out for me. Yet, I didn't think that there was a man out there that would be right for me. With my complete lack of femininity and grace, along with my love for cars and manual labor, what man in his right mind would want me?

I will tell you who. No one. That's who. That's why I already knew that I was going to be alone forever. That was why I knew that I would never get married or have a real relationship. If there was ever a guy that was cool around me, he would just see me as a tomboyish little sister like everyone in the shop did. I definitely was never anyone's relationship material. And I was fine with that.

"ENOUGH!" I heard Everett snap at me while I was working away.

"What the hell!?" I jumped and looked at him. I hated to admit it, but he had actually startled me. "What is the matter with you, Ev? What do you think you're trying to do? Give me a damn heart attack?" I snapped at him with anger practically dripping from my voice. Not to mention, I had a hand on my chest as I tried to calm my heart down a little bit.

"What am I doing? What the hell is up with you, Alex? Seriously, you've been muttering to yourself and being angry all night. What is going on with you?" I could tell by the look in Everett's eyes that he was not angry with me. He wasn't pissed off at all. No, he looked worried. He was just an overly emotional man, so he was expressing it the only way that he knew how to. "I hate to tell you this kiddo, but if this shit keeps up, you gotta leave. I can't have you moping around the shop and getting hurt."

"I'm not moping." I snapped at him. "I am not doing anything like that at all. I'm just thinking to myself that is all." I tried to play it off like it was nothing at all.

"Yeah, well, your thinking is getting dangerous for you. Do you realize I just stopped you from taking a hammer to the wrong part of your dream car? What would you have done then? Huh? Yeah, we could have fixed it, but it would have been your mistake."

At those words, I realized that there was indeed a hammer in my hand, and I had it raised like I was about to start beating on something. Maybe he was right. Maybe I was distracted after all.

Hell, if I was distracted, it was all my stupid professor's fault. If it hadn't been for her, then I would have ended up having a cake walk of a final project. I would have been able to write some flowery bullshit to tell her that I had been totally reborn as a fairytale lover or some stupid shit like that.

But now! Now I had to rewrite a fucking fairytale. Ick! I could already feel the vomit. And with me as a character in it no less. Double ick! Where was the nearest fucking bucket? I needed something to catch the contents of my stomach.

"I don't know what is going on with you, kiddo, but you need to get a hold of yourself. Why don't you head home early tonight? I am sure that you have some sort of homework to do. You're almost done with your senior year. After that, you can do whatever you want to do. Just focus on school and don't let things get the better of you." I knew that Everett cared about me. I knew that he had my best interest at heart right now. However, that didn't stop me getting angry at him for kicking me out of the garage.

"Whatever." I threw the hammer onto the bench behind me. "I'll go. Sure, I'll fucking go. But that doesn't mean that I am leaving for you. Or for my homework. I'm only leaving because I want to. Got it?"

"Hahh." I heard him sigh at my words before he continued. "Of course, I know that is the reason why. Don't worry at all, Alex. I know that you never do anything that you don't want to do." He was trying to appease me now, to calm my anger.

"Yeah, except for reading fucking fairytales. I don't want to do that but I'm going to." I shuddered at the thought of that. And thankfully, Everett acted like he hadn't heard me at all. I knew that he had, but he was pretending like he hadn't, all for my sake. I silently thanked him in my head for that. He was a good guy, and I knew that. That was why he was like an uncle to me.

Just as I was leaving the garage, Dad came out of his office. He saw that I was leaving, and most likely noticed the upset look on my face.

"Hey Alex, are you heading home already?"

"Yeah, I have a lot on my mind." I tried to avoid his eyes so that he didn't see how pissed off I was, but I had a feeling that he already knew.

"Come on, I was getting hungry. We can have some dinner and watch a movie." At that he put his arm around my shoulder and led me out of the garage. He knew that the guys would lock up, so he didn't have to worry about it at all. Also, my dad was the only man that I would let put his arm around my shoulders like this. Mostly because he was my dad, but also because he was just showing that he cared about me and was trying to protect me. Even though I didn't need him to protect me anymore.

The two of us went back to the house together, which was right next door to the shop, and started to make dinner. Dad liked simple dinners, nothing fancy or overly complicated. That made it easy for the both of us. And this was the only part of my life that I was at all girlie. I not only liked to cook, but I was good at it too.

I had been making food for myself since I was a kid. When my dad was busy working at the shop, I needed to make dinner and take it to him so that he wouldn't starve. I had been able to teach myself a lot and in time got good at what I did.

Tonight, Dad and I were just making some burgers and homemade fries. It was simple and quick. The hardest part would have been peeling the potatoes and slicing them up. However, I didn't need to do that since I usually did them in bulk and froze the ones that we didn't need. That way, on days like today, we could just make some really quick.

The kitchen started to smell great, and before we knew it, we were sitting in front of the TV and turning on an old action movie. It was one that we had seen dozens of times already, but we loved it. Isn't that what mattered?

I was happy to be settling in for the night and just watching the movie. However, I had a feeling that my dad was about to start bringing up some topic that I really didn't want to talk about.

I had absolutely nothing to base that off of, nothing at all. However, I had this feeling like an ache deep in my gut. And that ache was telling me that Dad was about to get all sentimental and sappy on me.

UGH! I hated when he got like this. It was such a pain.