CH 26 - Gabriella's Pain

Gabriella creeps through the halls as her heart aches for the situation that they find themselves in. She knows in her heart that the one thing that Caesar needs more than anything right now is for her to be there.

For her to help him release the monster within him, the darkness he hides in himself that he never lets free. It feels like he is running from himself and who he is meant to be.

He was created to serve a singular purpose he had abandoned for her. While she is thankful for her life, this pain, a hollow feeling, exists within her. Something she fears will never be extinguished.

A debt that she could never repay; she sees it in his eyes each time he struggles with what to do. Every ounce of his being wants to attack to lash out in the darkest way. She wants to give him that, to submit to him in a way that will unleash his darkest demons, but he holds back.

Caesar is not permitted to release his most significant worries and tensions. The pain he must carry inside him, the pain she caused, is almost unbearable for her. She can only imagine how dire the pain exists inside of him, fighting against every desire, every hunger that festers in his mind.

Moving through the halls, Gabriella knows that a hunger lurks within everyone that people need to express. The moment you hide it away is when everything begins to unravel. It is the reason she has always needed for there to be girls in the house.

She required that avenue to release that pain, the wants, the needs. The way her body ached to inflict torment on others, the power of dominance, was an intoxication that is beyond understanding.

Slipping into her room slowly, she looks to see Lily's soft, delicate form. Gabriella can almost imagine how the young woman squirms with desire, having never been touched. The way her body would react to a light touch or a talented tongue.

The way her mind moves into the crevices of her being as she would love to explore each moment of her first pleasures, her first pains, her firsts.

As Gabriella steps forward, the scent of desire hangs in the air as she watches Lily moves to her tiptoes to reach for an extra gown. Her body stretches beautifully into a long pose as she picks up the silken cloth. Gabriella clicks her tongue softly, "Come here a moment, Lily."

"Yes?" Lily asks as she turns to look at Gabriella.

"Come forth, now mind or there will be consequences."

Lily turns and steps forward hesitantly, "Yes, Gabriella?"

"Gaby," Gabriella commands.

"Yes, Gaby?" Lily repeats.

"Have you ever been in the forest before?" Gabriella asks as she takes the gown from Lily's hand and tosses it on the bed, leaving her naked. Her body was exposed to the woman she submitted to. The one who guides and pushes her to be more than herself.

"No," Lily says, squealing and twisting her body as Gabriella's thumbnail digs into her left nipple.

"No, what?" Gabriella asks coldly.

"No, Gaby." Lily quickly corrects herself rubbing her nipple softly, a soft quiver in her lower lip.

"What do you fear?"

"Fear?" Lily asks and squeals as her nipple is pinched again. Pulling her body away as her eyes beg for mercy. It takes moments of twisting against Gabriella's hand for her to realize there is no easy reprieve. "What do you mean by fear, Gaby?"

"Mistress..." Gabriella hisses.

"What?" Lily gasps and cries out in pain as her nipple is twisted harshly, as tears fall from her eyes. "Yes, Mistress. What did you mean by fear?"

Gabriella removes her punishing grip and sees a tiny droplet of blood on her nail. Placing it in her mouth, she floats delicately in Lily's memories.

She wonders if Lily has been blessed with this gift yet. When Lily knelt at Caesar's feet, could she witness his memories? His hopes and aspirations. "Fear, Lily, what scares you?"

"I am afraid of the unknown. When I hear something moving towards me but I can't see it."

"That is something that scares everyone, don't be ashamed of that."

"I'm not..."

"Excuse me?"

"Sorry, Mistress."

"Better."

"What about you Mistress?"

"I fear disappointing Caesar," Gabriella says, realizing she is probably being far too honest in her response.

"Same here," Lily sighs.

"Then why did you run from him?"

"I was scared, Mistress. He just killed someone right before my eyes. Someone I knew so well. Or thought I did."

"Then perhaps you should stay here."

"Why?" Lily asks in exasperation and then howls as her right nipple falls under the same torment. "Please Mistress... I'll do better."

"You better. You need to be trained to listen and do exactly as I say. You need to be able to listen when I tell you to stop. The world is far too dangerous to run away when you are scared. You never know what you can run into."

"I can't stay Mistress. I need to go!"

"Why?"

"I can't let him down again, Mistress."

"You mean since you had ran away?"

Lily nods as tears readily fall from her eyes. If she is honest, she doesn't even remember how she got here. But she knows she owes Nica, Gabriella, and even Caesar her life.

She needs to do something to repay them. Lilly can't be left alone, leaving her fears of not doing or being enough. Even if it means facing her nightmares, doing so is better than doing nothing. However, she repays that she is ready.

"Have you ever ran away from him Mistress?"

"Worse."

"Worse, Mistress?"

"To save my life he ran away from himself. I still can't forgive myself for that."

"Who was he Mistress?"

Gabriella shakes her head and looks to Lily, "I need you to follow my every command. I will train you and in three days we will leave to find Zoe. As much as I want to find her, we can't risk your life in the process."

"Yes, Mistress," Lily says as she kneels at her Mistress's feet. Her head hanging low, she knows she wouldn't trust herself in the forest. But the last thing she could do right now is nothing. She needs to prove herself worthy of the risks that were taken. If Nica proves anything, the Gods were not pleased to lose their Seer and Outlier.

If Caesar is standing before the Gods themselves to defend her, she needs to be trained to serve him. If Lily can't stand by his side in a fight, the least she can do is kneel at his feet. Lily looks up as Gabriella runs her fingers through her hair, feeling the strange sensation building inside her.

Lily is right where she belongs. She was born to serve, and if it is her destiny, may she at least help those who save others. May her life be their blessing. May Lily bring a measure of peace that will ease Gabriella's pain.