I don't know what to do!
I thought to myself
I tried pushing the people infront of me but it wasn't successful
I'm shaking....
Those eyes... Those are the eyes that scares me
It made me feel I was just a prey, to be eaten...
Josefina's Past
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
A child's laughter could be heard outside
As I stared outside the window
"..."
"Ina?"
Mother called
"Yes?"
I answered without turning to look at her and just stare out the window
"Why not go and play outside with them?"
Mother said worried
I contemplated
"I don't think i'll be welcomed..."
I answered
I know what kind of expression my mother is making, and she knows it too
That is why she doesn't call my name for the second time, because she knows it will only make me sad
The reason mother was sad was what happened to me a year ago
I was desperate to make friends that it made me not want to have any
.
.
.
.
"Making friends..."
I mumbled
I turned the page and showed a picture of a bunny sitting alone while others play
Lonely little Bunny sat alone
He wonders "Why don't I have friends?"
"Is there something wrong?"
Lonely little bunny asked
I flipped a page and shows little Bunny running crying to his mother
"Why don't I have friends?"
"Don't they like me?"
Little bunny asked himself
"Shh" Mother bunny shushed carressing little Bunny
"Oh, my little one friends don't just appear, you have to make the effort and you'll see"
Mother Bunny reassured Little Bunny
I flipped another page and shows the little Bunny coming up to other children
"Hello! I'm Bunny"
Little Bunny introduced himself
Little Bunny was nervous, but all the other children accepted and played with him!
I flipped the last page to show a smile on little bunny's face
"I made a new friend, they don't hate me they just thought I don't like friends!"
Little Bunny exclaimed in joy and played with the others
And now little bunny has now a lot of little friends!
*SPLASH!*
"..."
I froze
The girl splashed dirty water on me and smirked
"Look weirdo, if you think with just apples you could be one of us?"
She walked closer and pointed at my head
"You.Thought.Wrong..."
And pushed my head with her finger 3 times
I backed up a little, I stared at her without saying anything, as I held the fairytale book and the basket full of apples tightly shivering in cold
She furrowed her brows
The girl got mad as she doesn't see any reaction from me
"Tsk!"
She clicked her tongue and ran closer to me
"You. Will. Not. Be. Our. Friend. Ever. You weirdo!"
She exclaimed as she continues to push my body until I fell down
"Ow!"
I shouted
I lose my grip and the basket that was full of apples fell along with the story book that got wet by the dirty water
I fell and hurt my knee and palm
My heart raced and I was scared, I looked up at them in hopes they're just joking but they were not, in fact they looked at me angrily and disgust
I stayed just there sitting on the muddy ground as the girl knelt down and took the book
"Little Bunny makes Little Friends..."
She mumbled
She looked at me sadly
I looked back
Does she finally want to be friends with me?
Is the book right?
Did they thinkt I don't want friends?!
I thought to myself in hopes to be right
I stared at her smiling happily and
*KRRRT!*
"Huh?"
She.... Ripped my book...?
I thought to myself
*KRRRT!*
Again...
*KRRRT!*
And Again...
She stood up and threw the pieces of my ripped book to my face and laughed
"KYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA you really thought i'd change my mind and accept you? Dream on weirdo!"
*Snicker Snicker*
"Hehehehehehe"
She screamed to my face and all of them laughed and left with her
".... The little Bunny is a lie..."
I mumbled
I stood up and picked up the ripped book and the fallen apples
*Swash~*
It was suddenly raining
I grabbed the last apple that was on the ground and stared at it blankly, I looked up to see the gloomy sky as rain fell onto my face
My eyes begun to feel hot
I wasn't sure if I begun to cry or if it was the rain
"I'm tired..."
I mumbled
.
.
.
.
.
I went home all cold and dirty
I walked to our door and reached for the door knob with shakey hands
*Click*
I opened the door
"Ina you're just in time for-"
Mother's happy face turned to sadness
As I stood at the doorway staring at her with my wet dress, ripped book, and dirty basket
Mother turned away and got a towel, she wrapped it around me and hugged me tightly
"You're a very strong girl"
Mother whispered
I feel her body shaking as she hugged me tightly, she was crying...
She cried for me when I didn't even shed a single tear for me
I hugged her back tightly, and the both of us silently hugged each other
.
.
.
.
Since that day, I don't go out often and instead just watch them play while I help my mother with chores
I was curious what they don't like about me
And so in my free time I looked in the mirror and scanned myself
What's different?
I thought
I looked closely
"Ah! My eyes looked fierce my eyebrows are always furrowed"
Was this the reason they don't like me?
I thought
I tried smiling
And as soon as I smiled, I looked even angrier I looked more unapproachable
Was this one of the reasons too?
I thought
I stood there for many seconds and touched the mirror
And looked at myself even more closely
"Is it because of my hair?"
My hair is the color of an ube, a dark purple
I've always liked my hair, since my hair reminded me of my late father
I caressed my hair gently remembering my father
"I don't need friends"
I thought to myself
"Me and my mother are enough"
I said
I looked at the mirror once again and tighten the grip of my hands to my hair
"Be strong Ina"
I whispered
.
.
.
.
The next day I confronted the girl that hurt me
"Ellena!"
I shouted whilst running to her direction
She stopped and looked back at me and so does her friends
"Oh, tou came back? Was yesterday not enough?"
She giggled along her peers
*Huff Huff*
I panted catching my breath
"I- *Huff huff* need you to apologize to me"
I said while panting, I looked directly into her eyes
"Huh?!"
She exclaimed as she looked at me weirdly
She turned her head to look at her friends and to confirm if what she hears is right
"Look what I did yesterday isn't that big of a deal"
She said shrugging her shoulders
Not big of a deal?
I thought bitterly
"That's just normal for friends, they always fight like that, isn't that what you want? Friends?"
She added making a face
"I do agree friends fight but not to that extent, and once they fight they apologize after"
I said reasoning with them
"How would you know?"
She asked
"It's just common sense, or you wouldn't know since you don't have real friends..."
I answered
"Ha! Says the one who doesn't have one!"
She yelled
I looked at her with my eyebrows furrowed
"I just wish for you to apologize, and when you do I won't bother you anymore..."
I said calmly
She thinks with an eyebrow raised
"Hmmm... Ok I'll apologize"
She said
I waited
She looked down and said
"I apologize..."
I was delighted, with a simple sorry lifted my spirit's up
"I accept"
I said happily
I walked away with a smile on my face
That was easy than I thought! I'm glad this is all over
I thought
"That your mother was impregnated by a lowly merchant and you were born by their filthy acts!"
She shouted
I stopped, my heart beat begun to go fast
*Giggle Giggle!*
They giggled
"Let's go before that angry looking freak will go berserk!"
She said as she laughs while other snicker with
And walked away
To be Continued~