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I Own a Funeral Home: Live Stream Following Other Streamers and Shock the Entire Internet!

Li Yidao transmigrated into a parallel world and became the owner of a funeral home. While browsing videos, he accidentally came across a seductive woman in yoga pants. Suddenly, a system prompt appeared in his mind. [Due to long-term fasting, the probability of sudden cardiac arrest and death is 99%!] Yang Lin quickly gave her a like and followed her and then advertised his funeral home. [No worries after death. Yidao will escort you all the way. We provide all-in-one services to ensure that your affairs are taken care of. Pre-booking can enjoy a 50% discount!] Netizens laughed and praised him for being good at doing business, but they didn't expect Li Yidao's prediction to come true. The next day, the seductive woman died of sudden cardiac arrest. People were all dumbfounded. After a few more such incidents, Li Yidao became famous on the Internet. Netizens begged him to spare their lives. One day, Li Yidao entered Zhou Shuyi's live room. While she was happily demonstrating how to swallow a goose egg, a notification appeared. "Li Yidao's Funeral Home just followed you!" Zhou Shuyi exclaimed, "Hey, dude, your ID is interesting!" "Shuyi, run! Li Yidao is coming!" "You are going to be killed by Li Yidao, Shuyi... no one can escape once he follows you." "Oh no, big mouth, I'm gonna miss you..." "Rest in peace, Shuyi..." From then on, everyone was terrified of Li Yidao. Anyone who was followed by him quietly wrote their wills...

Gemini Sheep · 都市
分數不夠
273 Chs

So You Want Me to Be a Negative Teaching Material?!

編輯: Nyoi-Bo Studio

"Emmm..."

"Then I'll follow him?"

Li Yidao's hand, which was about to start typing, suddenly stopped.

"My respected Officer Li, you've taken my lines. What else can I say?"

Li Hui rolled his eyes at him and stopped talking, continuing to stare at the screen.

Li Yidao opened the input box.

"Extreme sports come with risks. Be cautious, cautious, and even more cautious!"

Hmm, not bad. The system didn't prompt anything.

The propaganda was inserted at the back.

[No worries after death, Li Yidao will escort you. Full-service one-stop, ensuring please of mind for your loved one. Pre-bookings enjoy a 50% discount!]

Send!

He casually liked and followed.

Done!

Seeing Li Yidao's smooth operation, Li Hui and the other police officer looked at him at the same time.

Cough cough. Feeling their gazes, he continued to swipe the screen.

Returning to the embrace of the yoga ladies, interspersed with some strange AI-generated scenes, it was very beautiful!

Just like that, Li Yidao continued to scroll for nearly five minutes.

On the other side, big eater Brother Long had already eaten his 20th burger!

It had to be said that there was something fishy with those hamburgers.

The hamburgers used for live streams looked big, but they were not that big in reality.

Even some of the meat was specially processed.

However, this could not hide the fact that Brother Long was truly a good eater!

Li Yinuo had been staring at the screen the entire time. The durian pizza in her hand was emitting a strong 'fragrance!'

...

[Ding! Detected ordinary customer, ID: Drunk for Today]

[Death Status Detection: Alcohol poisoning, Death Probability is 75%]

[It is advised that the host can follow the ordinary customer.]

A 75% death probability? It was not too low!

Li Hui saw Li Yidao's scrolling hand stop again.

Seeing that he had stopped scrolling, Li Hui turned to Li Yidao again. "Is it because long-term drinking and alcohol poisoning can be dangerous?"

He looked at Li Hui's serious and puzzled expression.

Li Yidao was dumbfounded!

He thought, "F*ck!

"Big brother!

"Are you kidding me? You have a system too, right?

"How do you even know this?"

Li Yidao nodded silently. "Well... maybe... Should I intervene?"

Li Hui ignored him and rolled his eyes at Li Yidao. "Are you the one who chooses or am I the one who chooses? Do as you see fit!"

"Emm..." Li Yidao cursed in his heart!

"I'm the one who's choosing, but you always say things that are as accurate as the system!"

He no longer cared.

He said inwardly, "F*ck, life and death are at stake, so go your separate ways! I'll go all out!"

He skillfully opened the text input interface.

"Alcohol is the essence of food, but excessive drinking may cause alcohol poisoning! Please be careful, influencer!"

The editing was complete and ready to be published.

Oh, F*ck!

Li Yidao instantly felt a chill run through his body!

An invisible pressure of death instantly swept over!

D*mn it!

Did he trigger the rules?

It was so close, so close. He almost clicked send out of habit!

Several previous comments made Li Yidao think that he had the system under control, but now it seemed that he was still too young!

The sweat on his forehead was already shockingly visible, and even his back was instantly drenched!

His reaction was naturally noticed by Li Hui, who was beside him.

"What's wrong? Why are you sweating so much?" Li Hui frowned.

Just now, he also felt a somewhat eerie feeling.

He subconsciously glanced around the room.

Wasn't this funeral shop a little weird...

"Ah, ah! It's nothing, I'm fine. I just had a sudden stomachache."

As he spoke, Li Yidao pretended that nothing had happened and looked at the comment he had just written.

Alcohol poisoning!

He realized the problem at a glance!

He had directly written out the other party's cause of death. Wasn't he courting death?

Previously, he had only warned about potential dangers in a particular industry.

However, his words directly mentioned the cause of death!

It would be strange if the system didn't mess with him.

He deleted the comment very naturally.

After some thought, he edited it again.

"Smoking is harmful to your health. Drinking is harmful to your health as well. Stay away from tobacco and alcohol to protect your health!"

This time, there were no notifications.

Li Yidao secretly heaved a sigh of relief.

He added his tagline and then selected to send it.

"Yes, this comment is better than the previous one. Wine is food essence. Some might think that drinking has benefits if you phrase it like that." Li Hui commented naturally.

Li Yidao felt helpless.

Sigh.

It was difficult! He wanted to cry!

"Officer Li, it's getting late. Shouldn't we just follow these two? You don't really think I'm that godly, do you?" Li Yidao laughed.

"What Prophet Dao? It's all made up by the netizens. See, I told you the reason why I'm following them."

Li Hui relaxed his body. "Well, I'm just curious. The reason I asked you to follow two more people was for the sake of promotion."

"To warn everyone not to have feudal superstitious thoughts and to encourage them to believe in science."

"In a couple of days, I'll be working with the Publicity Division of our police station to produce a promotional video. I hope you can provide some assistance."

Li Yidao was speechless.

"D*mn it! So you were waiting for me here?

"You don't believe me at all, do you?

"It's impossible for you to have a system, right?

"The two causes of death that you mentioned just now were also random guesses, right?

"In other words, the purpose of having me follow two more people is completely different from what you said before!

"What about me becoming a hero?

"You've been scheming against me from the beginning, right?

"You just want to use me for your promotion, right?

"Prove that me, Prophet Dao, is just a facade?

"Seriously! Seriously?!

"But I say, big brother, what you didn't expect was...

"If these streamed really kick the bucket, then your promotional video..."

At this moment, Li Yidao was cursing crazily in his heart.

However, Li Hui's expression suddenly changed, and a smile appeared on his face.

"Why? Are you unwilling? Hehe, normally, if someone reported you, we should take you back to the police station to make a statement and then interrogate you properly."

"Originally, I wanted you to help me make this promotional video and help with promoting positive energy then skip the whole process of investigation."

"Since you don't want to do it now, why don't we follow the normal procedure?"

"Emmm, Officer Li, you've misunderstood. Actually, I'm afraid that if I cooperate with you in making the promotional video." Li Yidao instantly admitted defeat!

"But... What if something really happens to the streamers I follow?"

"Of course, I'm not cursing them or anything. I definitely wouldn't want any accidents to happen."

"But as you can see, these streamers are more or less at risk. If an accident happens to even one or two of them, then..."

"Hehe, I say, Li Yidao, I think it's necessary for you to go back with us and cooperate in the investigation." Li Hui's tone had completely changed, and he even stood up abruptly as he changed his expression faster than flipping a book!

"Your fantastical ideas give me enough reason to believe that you have already laid the foundation of facts in advance to win the audience's attention!"

"I even highly suspect that you're part of an organized group!"

F*ck! Li Yidao was dumbfounded!

Where was the harmony just now?

Why did he suddenly turn hostile?

He cursed deep down, "Factual basis? Didn't you just want to say that I've already arranged everything beforehand?

"Aren't you trying to say that I might have actually committed murder?

"And an organized group? You're making it a bigger deal!

"F*ck!

"This shouldn't be happening!

"I can't bear this accusation!"

Li Yidao hurriedly stood up. "No, no, Officer Li, I'll cooperate. What evidence? That's impossible!"

"Don't worry, I'll definitely support the promotional video and help with the recording! I am the perfect example of a negative teaching material!"

"I was just talking nonsense just now. How could I possibly follow one person and target them? Look at this big eater Brother Long. He's still there eating... eating... eating..."

"F*ck!"

In order to prove his innocence, Li Yidao pointed at the tablet on the table.

He was just about to say that big eater Brother Long was still eating a hamburger.

But little did he know, Brother Long was currently clutching his chest with his hand.

His expression was filled with pain and grimness!

Then, his entire body slowly fell down weakly...

"Thud!"

His heavy body fell heavily to the ground!

The table flipped over!

The camera was also dragged to the ground.

Coincidentally, it was positioned perfectly to capture the fallen Brother Long!

At this moment, Brother Long, who had fallen to the ground, had a miserable expression on his face and his entire body was stiff!

Heart attack?

Brother Long's wife ran over and shouted crazily!

"Dear! Dear, what's wrong? What's wrong, my dear?"

The scene was in chaos!

Li Yidao was speechless.

Li Hui was speechless.

Li Yinuo was speechless.