He is better than others

When I returned to the rental house, the neighbors said that the water lines were back to normal even though the landlord said that the tenants should save water and use water properly.  I sighed in annoyance because I had finished showering when the water tap came back on in my bathroom.

 Seeing my reflection in the mirror disgusts me, yesterday I slept with Chen, and today I had sex with my student, isn't that so uneasy.

 Thinking about Wu made me feel dirty and went back into the bathroom, I took off my clothes and again splashed myself under the running water faucet, I didn't care if the landlord would nag or charge me more for water, I would pay with  Chen's money. I'm like a prostitute who sells my body to married men for money to survive.  Or selling my body to high school kids just for the free bath facilities, imagining it all gives me goosebumps, isn't there a better place for me to live my life well.  

My whole life was very bad, my parents divorced because of a bitch and now I'm a bitch, what's the difference between me and my father's mistress?  Maybe one day Chen's family will expose our affair, I have to stop all that before it happens.

 The water that wets my body can't release the pressing fatigue in my chest, for me all men are the same, only want a woman's body and talk bullshit about love.  Is there no one who sincerely loves me in this world? Sometimes I ask what is the point of me being born in this world?.  No one expects me and there's no point in me for a living!

 A knock on the door in my rented room stopped all this.  I turned off the faucet and took a towel, put my clothes back on again in a bit of a hurry, who was knocking on the door, was it the landlord but I already paid the rent this month.

 When I pulled the door handle I found one of my neighbors who is in her middle-aged, she is a noodle seller with two boys aged 6 and 8, she smiled meaningfully seeing my wet hair.

 "Ah, teacher Jang, sorry to trouble you. I want to ask you a favor. Can you get report cards tomorrow for my two sons?"  She asked for help but her voice didn't sound like she was asking for help.

 I lowered my gaze to the boy she was holding with a grip on the base of her arm.  "Quickly ask Miss Jang for help, you will get good grades if you bring Miss Jang to school, doesn't your homeroom teacher really like Miss Jang!"  She shouted at her son who looked confused and embarrassed, a blush appearing on his earlobe.

 I can see that the son is still innocent and honest while his mother is very busy selling his father. I never asked about their father, but seeing their condition makes me feel sore. while squatting down and stroking the boy's shoulder I smiled.  "What time do I have to go to your school?"  I said softly.

 "Nine in the morning."  He replied quickly.

 I stood back up and looked back at the middle-aged woman who was laughing hysterically at having persuaded me. I did all this for her sons, they were very polite and innocent.

 "Ah. Miss Jang, I am very grateful. I will give you a bowl of noodles."  My neighbor said as she pulled her son's body.

 I could see her grip on the boy's shoulder didn't loosen, surely the grip would leave red marks and a little pain but the boy looked calm and a little scared of his mother, I could see the grumpy character on his mother's face but even so the boy manages me jealous, I miss my mother.

 Women always have a way to protect their children even though the ways are sometimes unreasonable and even painful.  Then for a child?  They always expect a lot from their mother even though the end is not as expected but they will still love their mother.  That's how I feel.

 I closed the door again and leaned against the door that was tightly closed until my buttocks fell and hit the floor, I took a deep breath.  Does that mean I still have little reason?  At least I have a reason to stay alive even if only being manipulated by my neighbors.

 I looked at my palms, looked at my skin, many people praised my physique even though I never agreed with their opinion.  They say that I have a good body and a pretty face but I never believed it because-- because it was all useless!

 I should have sold myself to officials or tycoons because I was beautiful but in reality,  I only got a teacher and student, isn't that a shame.

 My cell phone rings and I immediately check incoming calls. My cellphone is already sophisticated even though it's very outdated for citizens' cellphones in big and developing cities but here, almost everyone only relies on the phone and SMS features on their cellphones.

 "Hello..." I heard Chen's excited reply, he greeted me and said that he missed me.

 I chuckle, you miss me or you miss my body.

 But to me Chen is better than the rude Wu, remembering the incident in the pool I lowered my eyes and saw my injured ankle, I took a deep breath remembering how Wu forced my body and injured my ankle.  He is very rude and violent, he only thinks about his satisfaction without caring about my screams.  He's so annoying and I'd avoid him as much as I can, he's not a very pleasant sex partner.

'Why are you silent?  I told you about the comparative study assignment from school.  I will arrange for us to go together, what do you think?'

 I took a long time to reply to Chen's words.  "Is there such a task here? Doesn't a comparative study assignment have a financial budget?"  I said not sure.

 I heard Chen's laughter from the other side.  "Yes, I used personal money to pay for this study, besides the students will soon get report cards and they get a day off so it's the right time for us to do comparative studies."

 Ah… I sighed weakly, the comparative study was just an excuse.  "Is this part of the honeymoon?"

 Chen's laughter was getting louder and clearer until I faintly caught the female voice behind Chen's laughter not long after he turned off the phone.

 My breath seemed to have stopped as my heart was beating faster, was that the voice of Chen's wife?

 I bit my fingertip, what if his family caught our affair?  After all, why am I responding to Chen's plan, don't I dislike Chen?  But Chen is better than Wu, Chen also has a lot of money and can meet my needs.

 "If his wife finds out then I'm finished."  While staring at the screen of the phone that had been cut off with Chen I tried to think.

 "I have to find another way so we don't get caught and.. the comparative study idea is that great, I want to show Chen city life so he can open his eyes a bit."

 I took the small mirror on the table, stared at my reflection.  Maybe I can't get rich businessmen or officials but isn't Chen not that bad?

 I'm tired of living hard and I don't want to share my body with that brat student. If Chen can give me everything I want then I will choose Chen, after all, he is experienced.