he will suffer again

I didn't think that he would come out this fast. So, he gets annoyed whenever Li Jun or Kang Si An gets feelings for me. Then, I can use this opportunity to use all of his minutes.

Does that mean that Li Jun catching feelings for me already? Is it because he already been in love with me once?

But he's married. No matter what I do, Wu Qiuyue is a part of his life. I know that she also loves him. If he catches feelings for me, I will become the other woman. I will not accept that title.

"Traveler, your body is frozen. You won't grow old and die like your aunt in this era." He seems to be in a worse mood than I am. "Is this a good idea to make this man fall in love with you? Did you forget how Kang Si An was living after you died? He couldn't forget about you even after a decade of your death. Unconsciously, I was pitted under his painful feelings for years."

This timekeeper wants me to consider Kang Si An, Li Jun, or him. I am confused. Is he saying that he also suffers with them? If you suffer with them so much, why can't you let me go?

"Don't stay here." He grips my shoulders hard. He implores me desperately. "If this man catches feelings for you again, it will be difficult for Kang Si An and me. You can't stay with Li Jun even if you love him. If he falls in love with you again and you leave him, he will suffer again."

It's hard for this keeper. How hard it must have been for Kang Si An? Why are we in this mess? This timekeeper is asking me not to awake feelings in Li Jun. What about me? Why can't I stay with the man I love?

Wu Qiuyue. His Son. Li Jun.

The scene comes back to my mind. He has asked me to become his second concubine. Even if I stay, I can't have all of him. Sharing him with another woman... these feelings will turn into something ugly. If I stay, I can't resist trying to turn his gaze at me.

I am not even a human anymore. A woman, who can't eat, sleep, or feel pain, will attract the attention of people. I look around 15 years old teen boy. If I wear female clothes, I can stay for 5-6 years more before people notice that nothing ever change about me. Can Li Jun stay with a creature like me? I am a freaking monster.

The timekeeper is sighing. He is clearly more disturbed than I am. Being inside Li Jun's soul, he knows him the best. He doesn't want him to catch feelings. He probably pities his host. He knows my doom is fixed. It's a fate that can't be avoided. We are both selfish. I want to be loved anyway. He wants to kill me anyway. We aren't even asking what Li Jun or Kang Si An wants.

"If you leave, I will ask for a pardon for your aunt."

His words catch my interest.

"What that supposed to meant?"

He gazes at me with mixed feelings. "It's important that my host doesn't catch feelings for you again and suffer after you die. Even if you die, I will stay inside him. I don't like that. You are also not sure whether you can survive past the date of your death in the original timeline. The two of us can make a deal. Until it's over and one of us is dead, you won't contact him directly."

So, he's truly afraid of his host's feelings. I guess that I make his job truly difficult. "Why would I do that? Kang Si An will fall in love with me. Li Jun will also fall in love with me. My chances of winning are more if they have feelings for me."

He shakes his head. "If you die, Kang Si An is going to suffer a lot. Li Jun and you can't stay together even if you outlive him. Don't be a selfish human. Why do you want to destroy Li Jun's life when he has a family?"

Poking where it hurts... "Whose fault is it that he has a family?"

"Yours!" He yells at me. "You destroyed the timeline and changed the past. It's your fault that you are stuck inside that body. Because of your selfishness, other people will suffer for a long time."

I don't know who is suffering. But, I am in the most disadvantageous position.

"If you behave, I will request for the pardon of your aunt. She can live here her without any worry if she promises to never change the past again. Even if she chooses to go back to her time when her powers return, we will let her off," The timekeeper tells me seriously.

He adds, "As long as she doesn't break any rule again, she will be able to live a normal life. If you say no, I will kill her with the dagger when I get the next chance. Without a doubt, killing the prince's wife is a grave offense. I will destroy Li Jun's life that you worked so hard to save."

It will be Li Jun who will get punished if he kills my aunt who is Wu Yixing's wife. I can't warn Wu Yixing. Otherwise, he will get suspicious of Li Jun. My aunt can't win against this timekeeper who can appear anytime anywhere.

"This deal is not bad, Traveler." He looks at me sternly. "You care about your aunt and Li Jun. Both of their lives will be spared if you agree to this deal. Leave and never come back to Li Jun's life."

I don't know how many minutes have passed. "I will leave tonight."