Sorting Mayhem

Albus now had two angry women on his hands so called for reinforcements, while he waved his wand over Ronald to stop the bleeding from his nose and vanish the bloody mess, he called for Fawkes to bring the sorting hat. "Let's get young Ronald sorted into Gryffindor before we hand him over to Poppy's gentle care, then Molly here can take little Ginevra back home."

Fawkes soothing song calmed tempers and amazed the students, Ron walked shakily to the Gryffindor table before sitting down, Albus popped the hat on the boys head only to discover that this morning had yet another shock in store for him.

"Slytherin!" screamed the hat after only seconds and Ronald Weasley immediately lost his breakfast all over the Gryffindor table, considering the amount he ate, everyone agreed it was the most impressive non-potions derived display of projectile vomiting seen in Hogwarts for many a year.

Severus Snape was delighted his barb had gotten that spawn of James Potter out of Hogwarts so easily, nothing Minerva said had managed to dampen that delight as he was certain Albus would somehow neuter all attempts to exercise her authority. He was having a wonderful morning until that tattered old hat had the nerve to place a Weasley in his house, was this some sick joke?

Ron's robes had already acquired their green trim with that hated badge over his heart, this was not the introduction to Hogwarts he'd looked forward to ever since he was old enough to say the word. His nose still hurt, his balls felt as if they'd been introduced to a bacon slicer and he had his own colour coordinating green vomit all down his robes, Ron had only one thing on his mind, "Mum, can I go back home with you and Ginny?"

Molly thought she must have gotten some of that porridge in her ears as she could have sworn that hat said Slytherin, Weasleys never went anywhere else but Gryffindor. Seeing her son in those detestable colours after the morning she was having, was just placing a cherry on top of the piles of shit. "Either my boy gets re-sorted or I'm taking him home with me!"

Minerva wasn't for budging an inch, "The sorting hat is an ancient magical artefact, not something you can order about just because you don't agree with it. The decision stands and you can take as many Weasleys home with you as you like, every one of them was drawing their wands on two first years, including a Gryffindor prefect."

"They were defending their mother who was under attack…" Dumbledore never got to finish as McGonagall chewed his argument to shreds.

"So it doesn't matter that Mrs Potter was protecting her husband from an intruder, they were going to be punished while the Weasleys escape? Not bloody likely, you all have a week's detention and I'll have that badge back Percy."

Minerva had wanted to give the position to Wood but Albus had convinced her that Percy deserved it more, there was just something about the boy that appeared too Slytherin for her liking, so Minerva twisted the knife. "Drawing your wand on a first year is inexcusable, losing to that same first year just confirms you're not prefect material."

Albus tried something to prevent the entire morning turning into a total dung-bomb, "Terrance could you be mistaken in your decision to place young Mr Weasley in Slytherin?"

The hat seemed to think for a minute before answering, "I could be mistaken," the occupants of the hall held their breath waiting on the hat's next words, "but I'm not. The lad has neither the smarts for Ravenclaw nor the loyalty demanded of Hufflepuff, by his own admission he'd rather go home than be in Slytherin, which hardly displays the courage required for Gryffindor. You let two of the bravest children I've ever sorted walk out the door because you refused to help them, I'm curious headmaster what's so special about this one?"

Albus had no answer, the Weasleys were part of his master plan to befriend Harry and keep the lad humble. With a wife now in the picture, Molly's recent deeds and Ronald in Slytherin, that plan was in tiny little pieces but perhaps the Weasleys leaving Hogwarts could be used to entice the Potters back? "I'm sorry young man but you must either join your housemates or return home."

"I shall be removing all my children from Hogwarts and rest assured, I shall be contacting the board of governors about the treatment I received here today."

McGonagall still refused to back down an inch, "Rest assured Mrs Weasley I shall be contacting the DMLE about your behaviour here today, should the Potters wish to press charges I would quite happily agree to be a witness against all involved in this travesty."

The twins fell on their mother, begging that she reconsider but their pleas were in vain, "You're all coming home now, your father can make the final decision tonight."

Percy had been publicly humiliated not once but twice, first an eleven-year-old with no magical training beat him in a fight, then his head of house took his badge and said he wasn't cut out to be a prefect. He couldn't wait to get out of here and wasn't sure if he wanted to come back.

Filius and Pomona had watched this morning's proceedings with great interest, the Potters leaving would be the front page of the Prophet for days to come, but it might actually be worth it to see their friend assert her authority. Both intended to insure she didn't slip back to just blindly following Albus, watching as the Weasley family also left Hogwarts gave them some idea what a hacked-off McGonagall was capable of.

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