Dream

"he-"

"hey"

"Hey!"

"wak-"

"wake up!"

"Hey man, wake up!"

'where am I?'

He tried to move his limbs but the sensation of touch had something amiss from his previous body.

'wait, I can think?'

"Hey man, wake up!"

Nameless woke up hysterically before breathing roughly, his body felt dysfunctional and weak. he easily ran out of breath while breathing.

In front of him was pure darkness yet it didn't take a moment before white light blinded him.

"Ahhh!"

Nameless didn't know what was happening, the changes were happening too fast, the last thing he remembered was being eaten by that alienoid beast.

"fuck! this flashlight has almost run out of battery."

"Wtf! who are you?!"

the light kept being turned on and off, going from light to darkness again and again before finally stabilising in light.

"Hey man, wake up!"

"Do you know how much trouble you caused me? please just go away!"

Nameless looked at the old man's face before looking at the light shining on his body and to his suprise, he was alive!

"I am... alive?"

"Are you on drugs?"

Nameless couldn't understand the question, he was too confused with the events happening.

"This is why the youth of this generation are failing! stop taking drugs! do you know the amount of troubles you would have caused to your parents? I won't call the police so just scram. people who saw you thought you were unconscious or dead and were about to call the police before they called me so I would check on you."

It was only then that Nameless had realised he was at his favourite spot, the place he used to lay down under the willow tree near the lake with the ducks in his previous life and the place he had died before.

"Wtf! I thought I died!"

"Man, don't say these things! are you insane? look at yourself, you are still alive. just stand up. I will help you this one time. follow me to the bus station."

Nameless struggled for a bit before he stood up and followed the security guard.

He was completely confused.

"Ahh fuck!" he couldn't help but shout as his head sent a burst of pain as he tried to remember his memories in the other world before a question popped up in his mind.

This question sent shivers up his spine.

'Was it all just a Dream?'

Nameless was both happy and depressed. on the one hand, he was still alive. on the other, he was back to this garbage world.

Nameless really thought that he could begin his new journey in the other world yet he died barely a day later!

He didn't even have time to miss this world nor the other.

On the one hand, this world was safer but he didn't want to live a meaningless life before dying of decay at old age.

On the other hand, the other world was very dangerous and it would be meaningless if he just died right away before doing anything.

Although Nameless had accepted death, he didn't want to die so fast.

He still wanted to live, to explore, to know, to think and contemplate life and its mysteries as well as to live true to himself.

The other world was absolutely beautiful yet it shared the same quality as this world he was back in, they were both ruthless.

As he had made his way through the giant park with trees to the bus stop, his gaze landed on a homeless man who was sleeping on the bus stop bench which had an obviously anti-homeless design but the sleeping man didn't seem to mind it.

He had put a small mat to cushion the bench before using the sleeping bag. one could sit comfortably in it but couldn't lay down.

Nameless kept looking at him before the security guard talked to him.

"This man has been here for a while. He was apparently kicked out of a homeless shelter and ever since he sleeps here, its a great place to avoid the rain and the wind. I do check up on him sometimes."

It was only then that Nameless realised that although that man talked like a brute, he had a good heart.

He then took the bus for two stops, it was already night but the sun set early so buses were still active.

As Nameless walked in the bus and the bus started moving, he couldn't help but feel lost.

He stood alone in the middle of the bus, alone silently.

The darkness of the night and the light of the bus made a stark contrast.

Nameless couldn't help but feel trapped and lost.

He didn't know how to feel, what to think or even what to do from now on.

He had gone past this world, finally he was free but as soon as he had tasted true freedom, he was dragged back in again.

What was even worse was that it was all just a dream!

All his ambition, all his resolve to finally live true to himself and be free, felt so distant at this moment.

He truly felt like hitting his head against the door of the bus.

He was puzzled, disgruntled, irritated, disappointed, furious. all sorts of emotions were playing one by one in his mind.

He even regretted being naive back in that world, he could have finally began his true journey yet he powerlessly died meaninglessly.

He felt powerless as well as feeling that he could have done more, he could have been more.

but in the end, life had played the biggest joke on him, it was all just a dream!

Nameless could almost feel life, god, fate or whatever controlled this world was hysterically laughing at him at this moment as if he was the biggest joke they had ever heard.

He couldn't help but gritt his teeth for a few moments before sighing :

"It does not matter. I will still live the way I want to, no matter the price I have to pay. I have already died twice anyway. I wouldn't mind dying one more time as long as I live my own life."

As he was thinking this, the bus stopped and he got out.

He lived in a small house that had 2 floors, it was comfortable and slightly spacious, although the house looked small, it had a small garden with greenery but it lacked trees.

It was the middle of the night, Nameless entered after opening the small gate with the keys in his pocket.

As he was walking to the door however he couldn't help but notice a small figure standing in front of the door of his house, the moment it saw him, it jumped on him.

He didn't even have the time to think before he was enveloped by its arms.

Nameless was hugged.

He looked down and with the light from the street lamp, he could finally see who had hugged him.

It was his mother!

She cried and hugged Nameless as she apologised :"I'm sorry my child, I wasn't a good mother for you, I'm really sorry!"

She wailed and whimpered : "I'm sorry, I'm really sorry."

She hugged Nameless tightly and didn't leave him for even a moment.

Ten minutes had to pass before she finally released him.

"The doctor called me, let's undergo the cancer treatment please. I beg you. me and your father are really worried about you. please as my last wish listen to me."

Nameless listened to her and let her hugged him yet he remained unmoved.

However deep within his heart, a few strands of emotions lighted up and the memories he thought he had lost before had came back.

He watched as his whole life flashed before him, all the good moments, all the small moments of love, of beauty, of true happiness.

Although his parents had abused him but there were very good moments he had spent with them.

Although he hated how many people abandoned him but he had shared his happiness with them.

Although the world had terrorised him but he had still lived beautiful moments.

Although he had suffered, he had also found joy in his life.

Nameless couldn't help but feel weird as if he was being influenced by these feelings and memories yet at last he relented :

"ok, I'll go with you."

it wasn't a big commitment anyway and he was curious to know when he would die or if a treatment was still possible. 

he didn't want to die a third time after all.

...

"What did you just say?!"

Nameless was shocked.

"I don't know what happened either but it seems even the CT scan couldn't pick up the cancer." the doctor sighed before saying.

"so you mean..." his mother was astonished.

"it seems the lung cancer had miraculously healed." the doctor said before sighing again.

Tears streamed out of his mother's eyes however Nameless couldn't believe him and kept staring at the doctor waiting for an explanation.

He wasn't naive enough to believe in miraculous things.

The doctor sighed before taking the previous CT scans along with the current one. 

He then pointed at the previous one showing the tumor which looked like a ball and then the new scan which showed that the tumor had fully disappeared.

"Very rarily, some advanced cancers may go into partial or complete remission. It is hard to believe that some cancers miraculously disappear, but it does happen. I remember discussing it with other doctors a few years back but this is my first time seeing it in person knowing how extremely rare it is but it is true that there are a few case studies that document cancer sufferers who experienced spontaneous regression of their tumour."

"a friend I had long ago that had already retired from his practice had treated a man by the name of Charles burrow back in 2005. he told him his cancer was uncurable, an inoperable liver cancer yet in 2006 after his daughter forced him to go through another appointment, the cancer had miraculously disappeared."

His mother couldn't help cry even harder and hug him but Nameless felt something was amiss, he had always felt the world was against him, he couldn't believe such a "good" thing had happened.

on the way back home, his mother couldn't help but wipe her tears and hug him :

"what a miracle my child, I told you, everything will be alright. me and your father have agreed, we won't interfere in your life anymore, you are free to live however you want and we will support you!"

Nameless however couldn't help but feel weird but at last he relented, he didn't much of a choice anyway.