Last Farewells

My morning would have been the same as usual, but today was different, I awoke not from the bustling servants and maids that I usually would but from the tolling of bells.

After putting on my clothes and looking into the mirror all I saw was a young prince, devoid of any clothing one would expect from his stature matching, no what I wore was simple black clothing.

A knock on my door brought me back from my thoughts, "Your Highness, are you done?", I didn't bother to respond as I walked to the door and opened it, I saw my small but personal retinue consisting of my nanny Masha, who had been with me since I was a baby, and my two quirky but dependable guards.

Masha held my hand and guided me through the corridors of the great Winter Palace, I tried convincing her that I was quite old to be led like a child, but Masha refused, sure I could use my princely powers to order her to stop but that left a sour taste in my mouth. I looked behind us to see my steadfast guards and that's when I realized that Andrey didn't have the inebriated look he usually had after a night of drinking, he usually got away with it because he was a senior guard and was still dependable when drunk and it seemed he knew his limits when it came to drinking.

However, that wasn't the thing that surprised me, no what surprised me was my second guard Genri had an actual expressive look, he usually had a look of disinterest, and the best I got to see an emotion was stoicism, which if I think about it is a contradiction. During this walk, his brows furrowed, his lips made a slight frown, and he seemed stuck in his world.

Exiting the Palace I saw a carriage waiting for us, usually when a carriage was arranged for me it would be full of splendor, but this one was much more conservative.

Walking up to the carriage Genri opened the door and I entered the carriage, inside was devoid of the luxuries the eye could tell but the seats of the carriage didn't deceive my sense of touch, it was definitely comfy.

Genri guarded the carriage outside with the help of other guardsmen, some faces I could recognize, some I couldn't, while Andrey made himself comfortable at the driver's seat.

Once everybody had settled down and the carriage moved, I truly noticed the differences this day from any other outing, no it wasn't the feeling of the awkwardness of being in a carriage and experiencing some motion of car (carriage?) sickness, I had been in one multiple times with my Grandmother and maybe today I would have been dragged off on some adventure with her.

The difference in my surroundings was the lack of sound, lack of smell, just a lack of anything, The capital of Russia, Saint Petersburg which on a regular day would be bustling with activities and the roads would be full of people was empty, apart from the occasional passerby and the rhythmic clopping of the horses.

The outside world made its presence heard when we passed the marketplace but even then the sound was much more hushed and as soon as we passed by the silence quickly returned, the silence continued for around half an hour if you asked me, then the carriage stopped.

"Well, we have arrived at our destination Your Highness", Our driver Andrey informed Masha and me.

Stepping out of the carriage I was greeted by the Peter and Paul Cathedral, well I assumed it was the Peter and Paul Cathedral since I knew no other cathedral worthy to hold the Tsars and Tsarinas of Russia, one quick question to Masha confirmed that it was the Peter and Paul Cathedral.

I was then escorted to the outside of the Cathedral by Masha and was told, "I'm sorry Your Highness, but I will not be able to escort you any further". I had expected that not everybody would be allowed to enter, it was not only a private affair, this private affair related to the state and so I'm not surprised by this revelation.

Letting go of Masha's hand I took a few steps forward and looked at the towering spire of the cathedral.

However, before I could enter the building I felt a tap on my shoulder and when I looked behind me I saw a woman, short of stature, and while she did not have a pretty face one thing that stood out was her clear blue eyes, "Hello Paul, I know you have never seen me before but I'm your mother", well I guess that meant she was Catherine, "Catherine?" I questioned.

"Well you are correct but it is basic manners for the son to usually not say their mother's name, although I cannot blame you for not wanting to call me your mother since I haven't done anything motherly towards you, but from now on I will try rectifying that, what do you think Paul?"

Hmm, what do I think about the proposition? I know Catherine was an ambitious woman and she usurped the throne from my father, but would she really take her child's throne without hesitation? There must be some motherly love there that would make her reconsider, right?

Me taking too long to answer might have made my mother impatient so she cut my musing short, "Well you can think about your answer later, wouldn't want to be put on the spot and make you regret your choice, for now, we have a sad event to return to, and speaking of the event maybe your father will be inside despite the unlikelihood"

Seems that private enemy number one of my mother is my father with how much she regarded him with disgust, not like I can blame her.

To prove my point when I entered the church and made it to my designated seat with my Catherine she spoke to herself, "Well that husband of mine has decided not to grace himself to his Aunt's funeral, typical, perhaps he is hanging out with some woman, well no matter, I didn't expect anything from him".

It didn't go amiss that she maybe purposely said that out loud for not only for me to hear but everybody else present, I looked around and noticed there was a lack of attention at the comment, well looks like universal hate for Peter is a nice past time hobby for nobles

Trying to distract myself from the farewell speech of Archbishop of Novgorod Demetrius I looked around the cathedral, you can see the typical frescos and beautiful artwork, I wonder how it feels to be a monk and see these beautiful mosaics everyday, I bet it boring after a while.

Then the door was slammed open, I turned my head wondering which idiot would ruin the speech of the Archbishop, the answer? Somebody higher up the food chain, my father, Tsarevich Peter who recently became Tsar Peter 3 days after his Aunt's death.

For anybody wondering the funeral was 3 weeks after her death, man this dude does his absolute best to piss everybody off.

My father stumbled around trying to reach us, don't tell me he came to the funeral with a hangover, as he came closer his flushed-out face proved that he indeed came with a hangover. 

He sat to my left and man did he reek of alcohol, I was in the middle and Catherine seemed to just ignore him.

Then our family was called upon, my mother Catherine was wearing black clothes just like me, and then there was the polar opposite, my father Crown Prince Peter, he decided he would wear some nice luxurious clothes to the funeral of the aunt who adopted him and became his mother.

I quickly dropped the idea that perhaps this was an alternate universe where Peter was competent and to prove my point, he went to her body, looked at her and went back to the benches to converse with a noblewoman, he did not pray, he did not even show even a slight show of sadness.

Next up is my mother and she hit it out of the park with that act, I'm willing to bet everybody currently here fell for it, even I would if I didn't know this was a political move.

Lastly was me, I came to her body and I don't know if it was me being eight thus short enough to be very close to her face but she looked peaceful and that reminded me of her life. A life where she told me of her happy childhood where she would be with her father hunting, enjoying things a young Russian Princess would enjoy, then she grew up she was expected to marry a young German nobleman who fate decided to take from her, then her mother was shortly taken away, her father had died before all of them and there were rumors that she was a curse, she couldn't find any marriage prospect and hence served no use and exiled from the capital city by her cousin the famed Anna, she led a hard life, I hope the afterlife will be kinder to her.

Ah looks like I was taking a long time, I forgot about that, I said my last farewell and went back to my seat.

The last arrangements were done and I was informed by my mother that Grandma would be buried in the cathedral, infact every Tsar and Tsarina apart from the outliers were and would be buried here.

Everybody in the hall was escorted out. If it were a movie it would have started raining but only the amount of snowfall increased. My mother had splitted of from me and Peter had gone somewhere

Walking out of the cathedral I saw my nanny Masha, Andrey and Genri waiting for me.

Well Grandma would have wanted me to move on, so for her sake and mine I'll live out this life of mine.