I woke up feeling tired as my stomach turned and I rush into the bathroom and vomited I eated last night. I flushed the toilet and reach the tissue before wiping my lips.
Muntikan pa akong mahilo pagka tayo kaya kumapit ako sa pinto ng cr. I used to wash my face and saw myself at the mirror.
My mind was occupied, thinking that maybe, I was not feeling well. I worked over time to Azure's online and attend my appointment. Maybe I was just tired of feeling like this. But my instinct telling me something which I became nervous as hell.
Nagbabalak pa lang akong kausapin ulit si Lexord. I'll chat him yesterday night and making up to him. Kaya kahit masama ang pakiramdam ko ay pinilit kong pumunta ulit ng banyo para makaligo.
I was renting a condominium. Good thing I have a money with me. It's cheap but I found it beautiful with a balcony. It's the view of city lights at night and it make me calm when I was stressed.
I wore a simple black leggings and a purple hoodie and white shoes. I was lazy to choose my outfit since there's a hotel nearby where I was. I just put a powder and blush on on my face so I will not looked pale and a pink lipstick. I let my black hair down into my waist before handling a pursed with me.
From: Leiden
Just arrived here
Binilisan ko na lang ang lakad ko dahil walk in distance lang din naman iyon. I reached at 5th floor and mention my name into receptionist before walked into him.
I saw how his body became more fit. I don't know but suddenly I became happy to see him again.
"Hi. Sorry to keep you waiting." I pull the chair behind me and seat in front of him.
He was surprised by my presence and I can't help but to laugh at his face. He looked so handsome now and very more attractive.
"It's fine, I just arrived. How are you?" He looked so happy to see me too. I felt relieve.
"I'm fine completely now. Just tiring." Humina ang boses ko sa huli at napahawak sa ulo ko nang makaramdam ako ng hilo.
"Are you okay? You seems looked pale." He touched my wrist and I saw his eyes full of worry. Still the same old him.
I didn't know what to answer that. I was nervous thinking of something. I gently touch my stomach as my heart beats faster. I wanted to deny it but my face more pale when the notification popped up om my screen that I was missing period on my track.
He saw it too with his brows furrowed before looking at me. It only got worsed not until the waiter saved me. I felt a little relieve when I was searching for what I eat. May kutob na ako kung ano ito pero natatakot akong maikumpirma ang totoo.
I show the waiter what my order and what will I eat at breakfast. I was so hungry after I throw up while ago. It was three dish and one chocolate shake with water before looking at him and mention some food he ordered including dessert.
"That's all."
Nang umalis ang waiter ay mas kinabahan lang ako ulit. I drank the glass of water beside me when I felt his eyes on me. I was so nervous that he found out everything. This person didn't even forget how and what we'll do before I came here.
"So, what our plan?" Nakahinga ako nang maluwag nang mag tanong sya.
"I still didn't know. I was just showing myself to you. Next month was the last my appointment here."
"Are you back for good?" He seems like an excited kid. He's still have feelings for me huh? Nothing changed for a short period.
I nodded a little confused. "Maybe? But I still didn't know what will I do here. It sounds so boring but I gladly help myself to accept everything now."
"Did you know that I'm still waiting right?" He spoked straight forward and surprised me by his words!
My heart beats fast like crazy ad my face heat up. So it was his plan all along? And waiting for me to show myself for me?
"Don't feel pressure, Krish." He chuckle. "I'm still in love with you, but I accept your decision even if it's positive or not. I'm still here beside you. Not because I love you. Because I choose to be with you." He held my hand under the table and squeeze it gently.
"I.." I didn't know what will I say to him. I have in my mind but I'm still not so sure. And it felt so wrong to show up to him, only to tell my instinct. It'll be a random and surprising topic.
"Can I come with you after this?" Pangungulit nya habang nasa malalim akong pag iisip kaya napatingin ako sa kanya.
"Ikaw bahala." Napa iling na lang ako. I was not in the mood all of a sudden.
We quietly ate the food silently. I was so focused on the food. It was so delicious! I even more surprised for myself dahil hindi naman ako ganito karami kumain noon. One plate is enough for me to full my stomach.
"Here." Inabot nya sa akin ang tissue na ikinatigil ko. "Wipe your mouth or I'll wipe it?"
I slowly accept the tissue in his hands. All this time, he was watching me to eat! Krishiana becareful! Baka mahalata nya bigla ang mga pinagbago ko. It's been 2 months. I was always stressed and I didn't even bother by it the other day. Not until I realized that somethings wrong in my body already.
"Thank you." Iyon na lang ang sinabi ko at natapos nang kumain.
Halos naubos ko na ang lahat ng nasa plato ko pero pakiramdam ko ay gutom pa din ako. I was hypnotized in his pasta food and lemon shake.
"You want it? It looks like you're still hungry." He laughed at my reaction but I noticed some confusion in his eyes.
"Okay, kung ayaw mo sakin na lang." Palusot ko na lang. I don't want him to see me like this but I can't help myself.
I needed to go to the nearest store after. I needed to comfirm it already.
After eating breakfast, he's still following me. Mas kinakabahan lang ako dahil nagpumilit pa syang sumama ulit. What if he founds out this early?! I didn't know what to say.
"Anong bibilhin mo dito?" Takang tanong nya nang makarating kami ng store. Hindi ko sya kinibo at hinanap ang pregnancy test.
I held it and looking for some food before going back to the counter. It seems like he's focused on one thing in the counter before looking at me.
I avoid his gaze. It feels like I'm going to past out. Alam ko na may namumuo nang imahinasyon sa utak nya. I really can't deny it. Kahit palala ng palala ang kaba ko ay wala na akong balak itago yon.
If turns out that positive will result, I'll be the happiest woman in earth. I dream about creating a family on my own. But I didn't expect this to be early.
Sya na ang nag buhat nang pinamili ko. Alam na nya ang unit ko dahil sinundan nya ako hanggang sa makapasok kami sa loob.
"Welcome, feel free to roam around." Sambit ko at sinabit ang susi bago ako mahiga sa sofa bed.
"Do you have a boyfriend when you came here?" I sense the doubt on his voice when I closed my eyes. I felt tired already.
"No." I shooked my head.
I used to seated up straight while resting my back. He looked at me in a serious face and looked for the pregnancy test I buyed.
I panicked and reach it to him immediately. I was about to go to the bathroom when he stopped me using my wrist he held.
Kinakabahan akong napatingin sa kanya. I gulped when he looked at me like he's trying to find an answer in my eyes.
"You looked pale when I saw you again earlier. I noticed that you eat a lot. What's the difference of today? I wanted so bad to say it Krish. And I know there's nothing wrong to assume."
"Are you pregnant?" He added.
Lakas loob ko syang hinarap kahit na nararamdaman ko na naiiyak ako dahil sa itsura nya ngayon.
"I wanted to clear this that why I'm buying these." I show it to him. "Please let me go for a minute."
He hugged me tightly and I even feel his breathe became heavier. "Tell me that I'm the father of your child." His voice so full of hope and begging.
"I need to confirm it. And you're the only one I wanted to love for the rest of my life. You know that right?" I cried on his shoulder.
"I'm sorry, shush. Stop crying. I'll wait here outside okay?" He keeps trying to make me calm and I nodded as a response.
I knew it that he was not stupid. He was an observer person even little things you do, he will notice it and he's not dumb.
I closed the door and for a minute. I was still scared what the result came in. I unlocked the door and show it to him from himself.
"I'm not ready, show it to yourself." I whispered with my eyes swollen because I cried.
He accept and looked at it for a second. His face was surprised follow by his crazy smile and reached for me to hug and gave me a kisses with love.
"Thank you! I'll be the great father of our child!"
I'm not surprised anymore but I'm happier to heard that thing coming to him. Seeing him happy makes me happy too. I was glad that I sent a message from him.
And I will not let myself destroy again and be alone this time that I'll make a new family to him.
Todo paalala sya nang makumpirma namin. He insists to go to OB already! And of course the other day came when we visit in the Hospital. I was almost 3 months pregnant.
"I know that you're taking pills right? How possible is that babe?" Nalilitong sabi nya habang pabalik kami ng Unit.
I rolled my eyes and push him lightly. "I can't take pills already after my ovulation, you stupid. Maybe it's your plan all along?" I tried to tease him.
"No, why would I do that? That's selfish. And it's not that kind of love that I will give to you. Now rest and let your future husband do the work." He winked and kissed my lips.
I smiled and kissed him back and deeper before pushing him inside my Unit and locked the door.
"I love you." I told him.
"I love you so much more." He replied before continue to kissed me.
To be continued...