Chapter 4 • Infirmary

"Ugh... Why is it so bright?"

I woke up to the familiar hot sensation of sunlight on my head. The rays of sunlight kept hitting on my eyelids so whenever I tried to open my eyes, I would instantly get blinded.

It seemed like I was laying on a bed with very soft fabric on it and assumed that I was in the hospital or an infirmary in the academy

Covering over my eyes with my right hand, I supposed that I could get out of the bed and look around my surroundings.

I saw something green to the corner of my eyes and tried to focus on it to fully visualize what it was. My eyes were still quite blurry after all.

However, as I tried to get out of bed to focus on that object, somebody stopped me on my tracks.

"Don't force yourself, kid. Your injuries haven't recovered yet."

The unknown person said, stopping me with his hand on my shoulder. It seemed like the person was a male judging by their deep coarse voice.

"Where am I?"

"Where else? You're in the infirmary."

The man said, scoffing at what I said.

For some reason, I could smell a hint of what seemed to be smoke from a cig. How would I know? My father was a smoker.

"...Are you smoking right now?"

Based on his attitude and the fact he was likely right beside me, it felt same to say that he was a medical doctor.

That said, if he is truly smoking, I presumed that he would simply deny it and scoff at my claims. However, I was mistaken.

"Yes. So what?"

The man said without any hesitation at all.

'Are you serious right now?'

I thought at his response.

"You're probably thinking about whether I'm serious or not, right? Geez, I can read you like a book with your obvious expressions."

Is my expressions right that obvious?

I didn't notice that expressions were really all that obvious. However, due to that thought, it all made sense to me.

Whenever I tried to lie about something especially when it was serious, everybody would be skeptical of what I would say.

Due to that, I've been decently honest since most of the times, the art of lying has never worked for me. I'd always get caught anyways. Only idiots would fall for my lies.

"Yeah, he's right. You should learn to control your expressions."

The author's voice suddenly rang throughout my head unannounced. It had slightly surprised me but I quickly recovered from it.

Though, for the last time, is my expressions really obvious?

"Of course."

"Of course."

The man and the author said at the same time as if they knew exactly what I was thinking about. I wasn't even aware that my expressions had shown.

I guess I have no choice but acknowledge it.

"Indeed."

"Indeed."

Can y'all stop reading my expressions?

"No."

"Nah."

The man said without any hesitation. It seemed that they were determined to read my expressions no matter what.

Ignoring that, I turned my attention to what I was originally doing.

Now that my eyes had adjusted to it's surroundings, I could now fully perceive it as it wasn't as blurry and vague anymore.

As of expected, I was indeed in an infirmary. However, there was a lot of curtains around the beds of other patients which made me to believe that their injuries could potentially be more severe to me.

"Tch. Does those patients, hid behind curtains, have really atrocious injuries?"

"Unfortunately, the answer is going to be yes. Trust me, you wouldn't want to peek a look at one of those patients. It's going to give you nightmares."

As I asked the man, he quickly frowned as he folded his hand in displeasement. The man even went as far as to hold me back physically.

"I never even had the thought of looking in the first place anyways. So relax."

I said, shrugging my shoulders. With my overly obvious expressions, I was sure that he would know that I was serious for what I said.

"Are you sure, kid?"

The man looked at me skeptically. Sneakily from the corner of my eyes, he was preparing to whip out the restraining belts at the slightest of my moves.

"Yes, yes! I'm not going to peek!"

"Alright..."

The man said, quietly withdrawing the restraining belts.

From the distance, I could hear the loud clattering sound of what seemed to be multiple people walking. Those people also appeared to be coming towards the infirmary's direction.

Turning away from that for a second, I turned my gaze away towards the green object it had seen earlier. Disappointingly, it was actually just some kind of tree on a vase. I actually thought it was a jewel of some sorts.

The sound of the footsteps of those aforementioned people were growing closer.

"Ah, that's my cue."

The man said, noticing the clattering sound of people and quickly packed his things in his briefcase.

"Oh yeah. By the way."

Suddenly, the overall feeling or aura of the man felt strange and worrisome. It was as if his personality had suddenly and entirely changed.

"Act like you can't remember anything. No matter what."

The man said, shaking off the little dust on his fedora and wore it on his head.

I had seen my surroundings and yet, I didn't give the thought of focusing on the appearance of the man.

The man had a lightly toned skin and had dark navy blue hair. His hairstyle felt distinguished and mannerful. The attire of his was a black suit and was even wearing white gloves.

He waved at me before disappearing in the crowd of people passing the infirmary.

However, there was one man from the crowd that came to the infirmary and called out for me.

"Er.. Who's Delaerin Svar?"

"Ah, that would be me."

I held my hand up high to catch the attention of the young man calling my name. However, I didn't try to get out of bed to give a handshake to him.

I could tell from the overall serious attire of the man and the list of papers the man was holding. This was going to be an interrogation but for what?

"My name is Juno von Worlintour. How have you been feeling?"

"I'm feeling fine. That's all."

"I see. It's incredible to see you in a good condition after experiencing such a traumatic event."

Juno said with a bright mood. However, I could tell from his facade of a mood that he was merely faking it.

He was likely just uninterested with the interrogation which was kinda shitty but nevertheless, he was just doing his job.

"Ahem. The question I'm about to ask you might be a bit severe for you to answer. Are you okay with it?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you describe your traumatic experience?"

The instant Junk said that to me, I tried so hard to control my expressions.

I mean, just what kind of question is that?

He was trying to ask me, a survivor with very severe injuries which fought a goblin with nothing but bare hands, describe vividly of what had happened?

Juno was eyeing me as if he was suspicious of something about me. I figured that maybe I should just follow that mysterious man's advice.

"I... can't really remember."

"How so?"

"I don't know! What's all this talk of a traumatic event and why am I all wrapped up?"

"You leave me no choice. I'll explain everything."

Juno sighed heavily, flipping over a paper.

I expected for him to explain that everything that I already knew.

"Let's start from the beginning. I'll keep it short. Your dormitory block was attacked by a group of insurgents."

'What?!'

I inwardly screamed. I was extremely surprised at what Juno had just said. I thought there was no way Juno was serious. However, I maintained my confused attitude just in case.

"You may know that our great nation is currently in war with the ungrateful rogue province of the Rymophis. It's absolutely dishonorable for them to take it to a place where it's completely uninvolved."

"You were attacked by one of the insurgents. Consider it a miracle that you lost your memory of getting mercilessly tortured."

"Your injuries alone is barbaric in itself. I, myself, can't believe humans would show such demonic actions towards a fellow human."

As Juno kept explaining those untrue things to me, my mind somehow felt strange.

Even though I knew that the things he said were false, it slowly felt like my knowliedge was the untrue one. His words were becoming more convincing to me.

"Delaerin. Resist it! He's trying to brainwashing you into thinking what he's saying is true!"

The author's voice echoed loudly throughout my head. It felt like I had broken out of Juno's hypnosis.

"Just keep tagging along with what the man is saying. If you don't, you might die."

Shit.

Immediately after I heard the author say that, I tried my hardest to act as if I was truly convinced at what Juno was saying.

* * *

"Thanks for your time, Delaerin. Recover soon, will you?"

Juno said with a smile whilst handshaking me.

"Thanks."

I said as a response, acting as if I was in a good mood talking with him.

Unfortunately, besides me, all of the other patients were so traumatized or inconscious to the point they couldn't speak.

As a result, Juno simply left as he didn't have any other people that he could interrogated in the infirmary I was in.

Waiting a few seconds, I kept maintaining my facade of a good mood just in case if Juno came back.

"Alright, you can relax now. He's gone now."

"Hah..."

I felt like I was going to suffocate under the pressure of acting as if I was brainwashed. The thought that I could die also made it worse.

"Hey there, "Author". Look, I'm—"

"No need to apologize, bro. I would've done the same if I was in your shoes."

The author quickly cut me off, telling me not to apologize. After I had humiliated him, he still forgave me.

"Plus, don't talk to me like that. I'm not saying that I don't like it. It's just that you look crazy talking to yourself."

As he said that, I quickly looked towards my surroundings and saw that some nurses were looking at me in pity.

As if I was having an imaginary conversation with a deceased friend.

"How do you feel about the experience you had?"

"I don't know. I didn't feel scared of death since at the time, I just wanted the gruelling suffering to end. But now that I think of it, I should have been scared."

It was true that I wasn't scared of death due to the amount of pain I suffered. However, I knew I should've been scared as it would mean that I would lose my loved ones and also vice versa.

My family would also lose me. I couldn't t imagine what the expressions of my family would be if they were to see my lifeless pale corpse.

To make it worse, I as a shitty person didn't give any letters to my parents about my well being. Just imagine their faces, whom thought their son would be alive and well, was actually dead.

"But judging by what you said and your expressions, you're absolutely right despite me not even knowing what you're thinking about."

"Delaerin."

The author said my name. The way he spoke my name felt different. It felt like he was about to say something important to me.

"Do you want to live?"

"Yeah."

"No matter what?"

"Yeah."

"Even if faced with many disgusting scenarios filled with thousands of people's death ahead of you? Even if you were to kill somebody to live?"

"Yeah."

"Even if your very existence is questioned and is simply a byproduct of someone's novel? Despite the fact this world is unforgiving towards extras like you, you want to live?"

"Of course."

"I see."

The author concluded. I noticed that he didn't breathe in or out while talking. It was if his words were robotic or like an entity that was not a mortal. Or like a god.

"For now, just wait a few days for your injuries to heal. When you're expected to be able to roam around,"

"I'll explain the truth of this world, what you are to my novel and how to survive in this unsuspectingly harsh world of mine."