chapter 61- Thomas

(Thomas)

"Jay, what's wrong? You haven't spoken today." I sat beside James, at the lunch table. We sat in our friend group, all eating lunch.

"Nothing, just I got an email, and I've been stressed and worried on what to do," he said. His tone was distraught. What could make someone like him be so down? Well, I have a few guesses.

"Who from?" I said, curious about the matter.

"Well, I got an email from Samuel's mother. She asked for me to come and visit him. I want to, but I'll probably just keep making things worse."

I looked at my friend. I didn't know what to say.

"We're now sixteen years old. We're coming to an age where we need to take responsibility for our actions. I'm surprised they haven't asked me to come in."

"Well, I'd like you to come with me. I need all the support right now," he said gloomily.

I stared at Jame, who had been, how should I say this? He had lost his passion, no spirit for anything, yet today felt worse, maybe because he has to own up for his actions.

I tapped his shoulder, "I'll come with you," I said. "It was also my fault. We got carried away with wanting to experience bliss, yet only a pile fo shit awaited usl."

He nodded, not really wanting to focus on the matter.

"So, you guys are actually going to visit Samuel?" Jacob asked.

"Well yeah, if I'm allowed. He's been in rehab for a long time, maybe the best player on our team before the accident."

"Yeah, can you guys go for me? I don't know if he would allow any of us to come by. He can blame us all he wants, but we still love the dude. Just tell him we're here and will listen."

Both Jacob and James were acting weird. They're mostly loud and don't take their time seriously in school.

"That settles it. This afternoon, or whenever you're going, I'm coming with. I'll bring a present just in case."I said

Six hours flew past

We were outside the door of Samuel's room. His psychiatrist walked outside, opening the door.

I breathed in. The rehab hospital had surprisingly good air, fresh even. I guess they take their patients seriously.

We walked in, as we saw glass windows, a white room, a TV in the top corner of the room facing the bed, but our focus was caught on a lad no older than us, facing the window.

"Samuel, is that you?" I said.

He didn't answer, but I didn't further press on. I wanted to be mindful.

"You guys are finally here. It's been a while, hasn't it?" He turned to face us, he moved away from his bed to show us his legs.

My face was filled with shock, and James's gaze filled with guilt.

Samuel was in a wheelchair, his legs or more like the absence of any legs.

I pulled a hand to my mouth that was wide open. I didn't know what to say. I had no words to express it.

The accident had happened half a year ago. When it happened, I was late, while James was directly involved in the whole matter - a car accident, and drinking was the cause of it all.

Jake and Samuel were the only ones in the car at the time, and James never really spoke about it, while Samuel never contacted the friend group after.

"At least I lost some weight," he said.

"Yeah, how are you feeling?" Jay asked.

"Better than at the start. Once I woke up, I looked down only to see that I had lost something that was dear to me. The pain, though, was a pain in the ass. Literally, the pain killers and medicine I needed to take gave me serious diarrhea," he chuckled.

"I didn't invite you," he stared at me, "but since you're here, why not? The more the merrier," he said.

"Then why now? Why not earlier? The others have been worried about you, called and texted us. You know we would've been there for you."

"Why? Because I was angry, pissed more than pissed, but I was also lost. Come now, both of you sit down. Maybe we can talk on eye level."

Why did he take this as a joke? Was he trying to lighten the mood, maybe distract not only us but himself from the terrible situation?

We sat down with the guest chairs, as he wheeled before us.

Staring at us, just observing, and not judging. His stare wasn't that of hate or blame.

I didn't even know what he was feeling. I knew he had mixed emotions right now. His eyes told me, a thousand thoughts and emotions were going through his mind.

But he only sighed.

"I wanted to see you guys. Being lonely has been hard, really hard for me. I just wanted to talk to someone that isn't my doctor and parents, embrace the change, they would say."

"This is a lot, well, mainly for you. Uh, you want our help? What do you want to talk about?" I said, my eyes darted to James, who was silent, staring at his legs most of the time.

"Well, I've been bored lately, lacking fun. I was hoping for maybe a drink or two. We're young adults, you know. There's no harm."

Suddenly, James stood up after he heard those words.

"Samuel, I-I'm sorry. You can hate me all you want, blame me, curse me, just don't beat around the bush, and let it out," he said.

I was silent. Samuel was still smiling.

"There's no need for that. I would like your help. If you don't want me to get a drink, can you please put a movie on, the ones we used to watch with the group? Yeah, 'Aliens versus Dragons', our favorite movie, about a team evading their home planet and restoring the ecosystem and the huge war. That was our all-time favorite."

"Of course, I would love to help." I moved up and went to the table with the many movie discs and searched for the movie, while I didn't dare to feel the tension behind me.

It was too awkward and strange.

I found the disc and put it in the side of the television.

"It's getting dark soon. Samuel, do you want me to close the curtains?"

"No, I'm fine. Watching the outside gives me a sense of freedom," he responded. "Can you guys help me back into bed? I would really appreciate it."

I gave James a thumbs up. James did the same, as we got to both sides and lifted him up, making sure he had enough water and food.

We sat back down and just watched the movie.

Hours went by.