Northern Lords. Fools that were promised and others arrive.

[AN]

How the fuck did this shit ass FF got 110k+ views in 2 days?

thanks, everyone. for the support and the stones.

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Standing there with the cold sweating lords of the Vale and a stiff as a rock lord stark the horses that approached cracked the ice they stepped on.

After a few questions and having already heard about me and my powers, Brandon stark (kinda the leader I think) of the procession agreed that it was harmless.

what worried me more was how Lyanna was staring at me. like if I was a juicy piece of mutton chop.

Please. don't. Don't fucking try to get into my pants. you might be Pretty. but you are WAY too young as of now. I'm dodging you and avoiding everything related to you (maybe except the mystery knight thing)

soon after exchanging some pleasantries and introducing everyone we all went toward our tents. only for there be a new commotion in the camp. Seems like Royal banners are approaching from the south.

Fucking great. ether Rhegar the Retard that was Promised or King Scab.

I swear. I could end all of this with riding there and a Storm Call shout. easy, fast, painless. but also I would be haunted by every single assassin in Planetos.

As the Northern and the lords of the Vale arrived at the southern part of the camp we saw the Royal precession getting close. the Dragon prince was in front. shadowed by the king's guard. there was also John Connington the sword swallower wannabe. after greeting the high lords the Crown prince stopped for a second and looked at my handkerchief pocket.

Seeing my coat of arms he spoke "Are you lord Garen Crownguard? the one who breathes fire. also demon warrior of the River?" asked Prince Rhegar asked in front of everyone.

"seems like i earned a few more titles." i just laughed so did Bobby B.

"I Am Lord Garen James Crownguard. High Thane of Skyrim. the last Dovakin. Master of Tuum. True Descendant of the Aenor. last Blood of Isildur King of Gondor. The one who Crossed the Sunset sea. and now it seems "the one who breathes fire and demon of the River" "I finished with a chuckle while inside i was "I'm gonna find that kid in Castle Darry and spank him untill he can not sit."

"Take care how you speak to your prince lowlife!" The man with the griffin sigil painted in his breastplate. while half drawing his sword.

this made me raise an eyebrow.

Prince Ehegar just raised his hand and he sheathed the blade.

He just Half Smiled. "I heard that you have 6 horse cocks" as I heard it I facepalmed so hard I think I made a shock wave.

"big, yes but just a regular man's cock" I just say in a lower voice.

He just laughs and so do some northern lords.

I'm gonna kill whoever started this fucking rumor.

"so for this insult. not only you have called me a Low Life but also drawn your sword. i demand I duel for the insult on my honor" I said as I stepped aside. while pointing at Lord Connington? idk if he was lord as of yet. but I will cripple the fuck and humiliate him. just to let off some steam.

The lords and ladies went quiet. you could probably hear a fly taking a shit 50 yards away.

"is that truly necessary? I bet we can come to an agreement" Said Rhegar.

"Necessary? yes. this sword swallower just drew his blade on an unarmored Lord, I'm not even armed," I say as I spin around lifting my jacket showing that I don't have a blade on me. trully a lie I could summon a sword or dagger whenever I wanted but they don't need to know that. " and now. what will it be chicken lord?" perhaps calling him a sword swallower was a bit homophobic. I got no problems with homosexuals. but I needed to provoke him. show that I'm not to be trifled with.

Also as far as I know Rhegar knew that Jon Cunnington was in love with him. he also knew that he was following him only because he wanted to tap his ass. and ignored him but kept him close because house Connington is the second strongest house of the Stormlands.

either way, even if they "bugger" each other I don't give a shit. you never draw a blade on another man if you don't intend to use it. kinda like Pilling a Knife in a Bar fight.

"Fine! lets duel" screamed Jonny as he drew his Sword. I was already between the two parties. Jonny boy charged me. making sure there was no one in between me and Jonny I just took in some air and

"Fus Ro!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" the horse was thrown back so mangled I bet the butchers would not try to harvest some meat even when paid to do so. Jonny boy is a bit better. since I aimed the shout towards the horse.

Arriving at the still groggy half drunk from the fall Jon Cunnington I remove his helm and start to viciously punch him. pulling away my punches of course just so I can enjoy this and show people that I'm not to be fucked with. making it the most brutal beat down that they would ever see. (imagine Ominiman vs Invincible.)

before people could come and separate us I just rose from the bloodied body of Jonny boy and spat. "enjoy your stay with the masters. fool"

Cracking my neck up I looked at all the nobels staring. taking my handkerchief from my breast pocket I clean my hands.

"What? he charged me with a horse and a Sword? what was I supposed to do? let him cut me down?" I look at both parties like that pulp fiction scene with John Travolta.

Bobby B as always starts to belly laugh. while Prince Rhegar is rubbing the bridge of his nose while waving people to take care and bring Jonny boy to the maesters.

The only thing I regret from this is that a horse had to die. Poor horsey. rest in peace and gallop on the golden lands of Elysium.