Vacant

I am not sure how long a stayed there, paralyzed. I tried to force myself to move, even if it was just one step. One step closer to Mother. One step closer to helping her. Every time I tried to me, even an inch, I physically could not. I was completely locked up. My desire to help did not matter an iota.

Some time has passed, I am not sure how long I was frozen in place. The howling of pain had dulled in my hearing, I could barely hear the cries of pain. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw something pass by me. Before I could let my eyes focus on it, it was gone. Yet still, I was immobile. I cannot even consider myself as a human.

"Rehor!!! Rehor!!! Get over hear now!!!" (Father)

Numbly, I followed the command. Something had finally, partially, jolted me out of my daze. I was told to do something. And I followed it.

"Go to town and get there healer. The house with the herbs on it, right before the lords house. Go now, your mother needs help. Run." (Father)

"Mmmm…" (Rehor)

I heard what my father was saying, but it was registering. In an instance, I felt my face getting smacked. Slowly, I looked up and saw Father looming over top of me, with anguish over his face. Tears were threatening to come out of his eyes. I had never seen this side of him before. My father was like a rock. Gentle, without emotions being high or low.

"Healer...now. Your mother is in danger. House with herbs on it before the lords house." (Father)

Emotionless, I turned around and started running. Every once I while, I started tumbling as I ran. I was not paying any attention to my surroundings. But I kept running. Trying my hardest to follow the commands of Father.

* * *

Eventually, I got into town. I am not sure if I was quick or not. I had not the foggiest clue of anything. I just had to follow Father's command. I am not even sure if I kept on running the whole time or not. But I did make it to the healer's house.

Like a robot, I knocked on her door, and preceded to enter.

"H..h...help." I stuttered. "Mommy needs help. I..I… I don't know what's wrong with her. Help me." (Rehor)

Much to my aghast, I did not see the healer there. What should I do? Was there anyone that could help me? Who should I try to find? I don't know what to do. Again, like at the house, I was frozen solid. I was unable to process anything for myself.

"What's the problem? I heard somebody yelling, but I didn't hear what you were saying. Calm down now, and telling me what seems to be the problem." (Healer)

"Mommy, screaming, Daddy...told me to come here. I...I…" (Rehor)

And then, I started bawling like the child that I looked like. My emotions had finally been let loose, with the calm words of the healer. Finally, I was facing reality, and it scared me. How could I be so useless, as to let Mother wail in pain as I did nothing.

"Calm down child. Now breathe. Slowly." (Healer)

The healer attempted to talk me in a soothing voice. Slow and droning, to calm me down. And it worked. While still and tears of misery, I was finally able to respond.

"My Mommy is hurt. I...I don't know what's wrong with her. My Father, he's the forester. I don't know what to do. Can you help Mommy?" (Rehor)

"Of course. I will try my hardest. And may all that is right in the world, I will make sure she is made right. Now, let me get my things, and we will be off. Wait for me, and calm yourself young one." (Healer)

* * *

"Thank you, ma'am, for coming. My wife, she's in here, and there is it a lot of bleeding. How it could it come from her? I don't see how it could be possible to come from her. There is too much." (Father)

The healer was out of breathe, from hurrying here. But she stayed calm and collected. Why was she so calm, Mother was in pain, and I could hear it from here? Hurry up, help Mommy. Don't let her suffer anymore.

"Lead the way to her, and then get me some boiling water and some cold water. Then you will help me." (Healer)

"Yes ma'am." (Father)

I was still in the door way to the house. While I was not as out of it as I had been, I was still lost. As I went further into the house, I saw Katarina. She was in the corner, by the stove. Crying. This whole time, while I was in confusion, my sister was inside the house, weeping. Nobody was there to console her. Especially not me. How could I be so uncaring, that I could not protect Katarina. She was mine to protect.

In that corner, where she was curled up, crying, I acted like a true brother to her. I sat down right beside her, and pulled her into my body. I acted as a blanket to her, trying to protect her from the pain of seeing, hearing, Mommy in pain. And then, too, I started to cry.

"It will be alright Katarina. The healer is here. She'll make Mommy better. She promised." (Rehor)

"Mommy will be fine?" (Katarina)

"Shh.. She'll will be fine." (Rehor)

* * *

We sat there, together, the rest of daylight hours and into the night. Mother's crying died down eventually. I am not sure when, but silence finally visited the house. In that time period, I heard the healer talking to Father. Through the walls, I could not clearly make it out.

As Katarina had fallen asleep at some point, I slowly got up and took her to her bed. With nary a whimper from her, I covered her up and let the night take the misery from her, into peaceful slumber. Something, I wish I could also embrace.

"Jindrich, see to your children. All three of them. You have a family to take care of. I will keep watch on your wife." (Healer)

Slowly, Father lumbered into our bedroom. The life was gone from his eyes. They reminded me of the numerous dead animals that I have seen butchered. Nothing was shining out from them.

"Daddy? Is Mommy okay?" (Rehor)

And then, from the nearly dead Father, I saw something leave from him. How can someone, who already appears to be a dead man walking, become closer to a corpse. And then I realized.

"Mommy is dying? Isn't she? Mommy is going to leave us?" (Rehor)

My words broke Daddy's spirit. And like what Katarina and I had done earlier, he broke down in tears. More so than Mommy's wailing earlier, Daddy's feeling of defeat broke something in me.

In a fit of rage, I got out of Katarina's bed and walked out of the room. My Daddy tried to grab me on the shoulder, to keep me leaving, but I kept moving. Nobody was going to keep me from Mommy. Not Daddy, not death, NOTHING.

As I advanced to Mommy's room, a nebulous fog started to appear. I recognized it was there, but I was completely ignoring it. I will help Mommy, or I will destroy everything good in this world.