04.2 Torn off things
I left the stables in a weird mood. It's not because of Henry. There is this distance, from me and the world, like nothing what I am doing really matters. It's all stupid. Being confronted by the king himself, for my crimes of rebellion, doesn't numb my bones, nor drag my heart down a slope — I am missing.
My steps naturally turned to towards the Captain's office. Where else do I even go? He wasn't in his office. I searched the grounds, running my gaze along the field of many people. Once, it was enough to determine his absence. Where is he?
His room is the one place I haven't checked yet. It's an unspoken rule here that no one knocks on the Captain's door. That's a private space for him. The Captain never said anything about it, but things just turned out this way. I don't have to follow it.