webnovel

Cosmic Janitor

A man on a hospital bed was offered a job by a god. Said god introduced himself as a "god of amusement and entertainment." The man unhesitatingly accepted; what was the reason? He was bored. Having lived his life to the literal fullest—parachuting, skydiving, racing, boxing, and other adrenaline-pumping activities—left him exactly in his condition—a crippled, sick, BUT bored man in his middle thirties.  Join him in his wild adventures as he battles devils, zombies, and all sorts of crazy stuff you can dream up while lying in bed. Updates: It depends on my workload. Also, on my cat's mood. Suggestions: I've got some "worlds" planned, but feel free to suggest a game or anime world that needs some serious "cleaning." Disclaimer: The characters mentioned are not mine, except the OCs. Especially not the Book Cover.

ChrisTian3421 · 漫画同人
分數不夠
80 Chs

Toasty

(Katsuo POV)

A week later, my trio and I found ourselves heading into Abberath's fiery domain. On the way, I managed to fulfill my promise of getting them gifts. Each item cost a hefty amount, around 500,000 Points, but seeing their excitement was worth every bit. I also gave a mental nod of thanks to TOM, my Patreon god, recruiter, and the genius behind the Interface.

Dem's Flameweaver's Satchel was a vibrant mix of red and orange, with golden embroidery that mimicked flickering flames. It had five effects: Heat Resistance, Magic Storage, Self-Repairing, Elemental Enhancement, and a Cooling Compartment. That last one seemed odd, but I figured it might come in handy if she ever needed to chill.

Kai's Thunder Amulet was a polished silver charm with a crackling sapphire embedded in it. It had three effects: Enhanced Electric Power, Energy Storage, and a Static Shield. This was crucial for Kai, who often overcommits in battle. With this, he'd have a fighting chance to save himself, or at least buy me enough time to save him.

Finally, there was Jade's Heart of the Forest, a wooden pendant adorned with living moss and tiny crystals, designed to fit naturally among the stones and moss of his body. Its three effects were Nature's Resonance, Healing Aura, and Earth's Strength. The Healing Aura was particularly useful, providing a soothing effect to heal minor wounds and replenish mana and stamina.

With these gifts, my remaining Points dropped to 867,850. I sighed, remembering my goal to purchase Yamato. Hopefully, this mission would bring me closer to acquiring it.

Just as I finished my thoughts, Kai, now enhanced by his new amulet, gave me a zap. It wasn't painful, but it certainly surprised me. "Kai, what did I say about not shocking your summoner?" I scolded, though I couldn't help but chuckle.

As we arrived at Abberath's menacing, infernal land, I cast Fiery Haven, a technique I invented myself. A domain courtesy of my badass manipulation of Fire and Air Elements. It basically has four effects: Fire Damage Negation, Flame Absorption, Invigorating Breeze, and Enhanced Elemental Control.

Fire Damage Negation means that within Fiery Haven, all forms of fire damage are somewhat negated. Flames and heat that would normally cause harm are hopefully rendered harmless. Flame Absorption is self-explanatory but cool—it absorbs incoming fire attacks, converting the energy into a radiant glow that reinforces the protective barrier. This absorption can also provide a temporary boost to my mana levels, enhancing my fire and air manipulation abilities for a short period.

Next is Invigorating Breeze. The constant circulation of air within my domain creates a soothing and invigorating atmosphere. This breeze helps to regulate the temperature, ensuring that within my domain, we are comfortable and free from the oppressive heat. The invigorating breeze also has a rejuvenating effect on those inside the domain, slightly enhancing our stamina and reducing fatigue. I chuckled, thinking about how this combo with Jade's new Heart of the Forest would work out.

Lastly, there's Enhanced Elemental Control. I gain heightened control over Fire and Air Elements within my domain. I can manipulate flames with greater precision and intensity, creating spectacular displays of controlled fire without any risk of harm. Air Manipulation is also enhanced, allowing for more dynamic and fluid control over wind currents, which can be used for both defense and offense.

As I finished casting, a boundary of Fiery Haven shimmered with an ethereal glow, the flames and wind creating mesmerizing patterns that danced across its surface. Inside, the air was filled with the gentle hum of circulating wind and the occasional crackle of harmless flames. The scent of warm, clean air mixed with a hint of ozone from the controlled fire created a unique and refreshing atmosphere. I glanced at the ground within the domain—it was lightly scorched, leaving behind intricate patterns of ash that mirrored the swirling flames above, creating a beautifully chaotic yet orderly design.

Dem, ever the flame enthusiast, looked at me with wide eyes of both surprise and pride. She fluttered around my ten-meter domain, her excitement palpable. Kai, my energetic bunny, zip-zapped around, obviously thrilled. Jade, feeling the fresh air, gave me a salute, as if saying, "Well done as usual, my King."

"Alright, team," I said with a grin, "let's show Abberath that playing with fire is our specialty."

Dem, flitting close, gave a little fiery thumbs-up. Kai, ever the show-off, did a mid-air flip, sending a tiny spark in my direction. Jade, ever the stoic, simply nodded in approval, his mossy exterior looking a bit more lively in the invigorating breeze.

"Remember," I said, trying to keep a straight face, "no roasting marshmallows unless it's a special occasion."

Dem giggled, her flames flickering playfully. Kai looked around, probably already plotting his next lightning-fast move, and Jade, in his own quiet way, seemed ready for whatever fiery challenge lay ahead.

"Let's move out, team," I commanded, stepping forward with confidence. "And try not to get too crispy out there."

The landscape around us was a hellish scene, with rivers of molten lava and fire-spewing geysers. "Looks like Abberath really cranked up the thermostat," I joked, feeling a cooling breeze within my Fiery Haven.

The path ahead was less a road and more a trail of scorched earth, like someone had a really bad barbecue party. "Just follow the burnt toast crumbs," I muttered to myself, trudging forward.

It didn't take long before we encountered the first of Abberath's welcoming members: the Flame Sentinels. These guys were basically walking bonfires with bad attitudes. One of them raised a flaming sword and charged at us. "You know, you could've just asked for a light," I quipped, as my trio engaged them.

The noticeable downside of maintaining my domain was, well, maintaining it. I couldn't just Shunpo around since this was a technique I made within a week, mind you. And I definitely couldn't engage in close-range combat, which was my specialty. Not that I'm lacking in the long-range department, but still. A price for a price. Just give me a month or two, and this domain of mine would become hell—for my enemies.

Sighing, I used Summoned Swords, and numerous ethereal blades hovered around us, ready to strike.

As we ventured deeper, the heat became oppressive, and I started appreciating my domain more and more, knowing the air outside would be unbearably hot. Then, we spotted them: the Fire Dogs. These hellish hounds looked like someone dipped them in molten lava for fun. "Good doggies," I called out confidently. One of them growled, and I joked, "Fetch the bunny?" I glanced at Kai. The Volt Bunny responded with a zip and quickly zapped the dogs.

After the not-so-intense fight, the landscape around us got more hellish by the minute, with rivers of lava and smoking craters. "Looks like someone really overdid it with the yard work," I mused. Suddenly, a massive figure stepped into my path: a Flame Sentinel Champion. He was about twice the size of the regular sentinels and twice as grumpy. "Oh great, it's Big Brother," I muttered. The Champion roared, swinging a fiery mace that looked like it could flatten a house.

"Jade, Dem, I choose both of you!" I shouted, feeling like a Pokemon trainer.

Jade leaped forward with a determined nod, his rocky form glowing with the power of his new Heart of the Forest. Dem fluttered beside him, her Flameweaver's Satchel radiating with heat-resistant energy. The Champion swung his massive mace down with a force that shook the ground, but Jade intercepted it, his sturdy form absorbing the impact.

Dem darted around the Champion, as she peppered him with fiery blasts. "Nice work, Dem! Keep him distracted!" I called out. Meanwhile, Jade held his ground, using his strength to push back against the Champion's relentless attacks.

I focused on keeping the oppressive heat at bay. Summoned Swords hovered around me, ready to strike. "Okay, big guy, let's see how you like a taste of your own medicine," I muttered, directing the ethereal blades toward the Champion. They sliced through the air, striking the fiery behemoth with precision.

The Champion roared in frustration, turning his attention toward me. "Jade, now!" I shouted. Jade seized the moment, using the enhanced strength from his Heart of the Forest to slam the Champion with a Earthen Punch. The impact sent the fiery giant stumbling backward.

"Finish him, Dem!" I commanded. Dem unleashed a concentrated blast of fire, her satchel glowing brightly as she channeled all her energy into the attack. The Champion let out a final roar before collapsing into a heap of smoldering embers.

"Good job, team," I said, giving them a thumbs-up. Dem flitted around excitedly, Kai zipped back and forth in celebration, and Jade gave me a nod of approval.

I spotted Abberath's altar in the distance. "Almost there," I said to my trio as we moved forward. But of course, it wouldn't be that easy. Emerging from the lava pools were the Infernal Legionnaires, skeletal warriors wreathed in flames. "Oh, for the love of—can't you guys take a day off?" I complained.

The Legionnaires didn't answer, obviously, but they did try to toast us alive. Well, "try" was a stretch since what we felt was just a gentle breeze.

Finally, we reached the altar, where Abberath himself awaited. "Hey, Abberath, long time no see!" I called out, half-joking. He responded by erupting in a massive pillar of flame. "Yeah, yeah, I get it. You're hot stuff," I shouted over the roar of the flames.

"You guys take a rest, yeah?" I said to the exhausted forms of my trio. They had certainly outdone themselves and were clearly excited about testing their new limits.

With my Earth Manipulation, I created our ever so iconic out-of-place igloo, now with the new feature of Fiery Haven. I chuckled as the range of my domain around me lessened to a meek two inches. It was definitely straining my brain, but a sacrifice I'm willing to pay. Then, as if on cue, Abberath roared.

As I stood before Abberath's altar, the heat was so intense that I felt it even within my domain. Abberath, the Cloven One, the god of flame and destruction, stood before me in all his fiery glory. His body was a mass of writhing flames, horns glowing like molten iron, and eyes burning with an unholy light. "Alright, Abberath," I muttered to myself, "let's turn up the heat."

Without warning, Abberath raised his hands, and the ground around us erupted in fire. "Guess that's a 'hello' in flame god speak," I quipped, dodging to the side to avoid the lava geysers. The air was filled with the crackling of flames and the smell of burning rock.

Abberath roared, and a wave of fire surged towards me. I used Earth Manipulation to block his attack. As I saw my barrier melt, I couldn't help but shout, "Could you turn it down a notch?" I then leapt and slashed at his legs. Sanchomo cut through the flames, causing him to stumble, but not before swinging his massive arms at me.

I dodged just in time, the force causing the ground to tremble. "Watch it, you're gonna knock over your own altar!" I yelled. Abberath responded with another roar and summoned a horde of Infernal Legionnaires. "Great, more flaming skeletons," I muttered, using Rapid Slash as a mob cleaner. Their bones crackled and burst into flames as they fell, adding to the already hellish landscape.

Abberath started casting fireballs the size of small boulders, launching them at me with terrifying accuracy. I darted from side to side, barely avoiding getting turned into a crispy critter. "This is getting a bit too toasty for my taste," I said, feeling the heat on my face.

I spotted an opening and used a Pyrobolt on Abberath, aiming for his glowing heart. It struck true, and Abberath let out a deafening scream, his flames flickering. "How do you like that, you overgrown campfire?" I taunted, though my relief was short-lived.

Abberath recovered quickly, his flames burning even brighter. He slammed his fists into the ground, causing fiery fissures to open up around me. I dodged over one, then noticed a fireball aimed at the igloo. "Okay, maybe taunting the fire god wasn't the best idea," I muttered, running as fast as I can and deflecting the fireball.

With the igloo now safe, I focused on Abberath. "Alright, big guy, let's finish this," I said, charging at him with Sanchomo ready.

The fight continued, the sounds of lava and earth fissures echoing around the scene like some sort of hellish symphony. Abberath roared, his fiery breath scorching the air. "Is that your battle cry or did you just have bad chili for lunch?" I quipped, dodging a massive fireball.

As I zipped around, I decided to try something different. "Hey, Abberath, ever played catch?" I shouted, hurling a massive Giant Sword at him. He caught it alright—right in the chest. The explosion rocked the altar, sending sparks flying. "Nice catch!" I yelled, though I doubted he appreciated the compliment.

Abberath, clearly not amused, summoned more Infernal Legionnaires. "Oh, come on, I thought we already sent these guys to detention!" I groaned, quickly dispatching them with Rapid Slash. Their flaming bones disintegrated into ash.

He raised his hands, summoning a giant lava golem from the molten ground. "Seriously? A lava golem? That's your big move?" I taunted. "I've seen hotter stones in my morning coffee!" The golem lumbered towards me, each step sending tremors through the ground. I darted around it, slashing at its limbs. "You need to work on your footwork, buddy!"

As the golem crumbled into a pile of molten rock, Abberath roared in frustration. "I guess someone needs a timeout," I said, charging at him with Sanchomo. I aimed for his glowing heart, but he blocked with a wall of flame. "Nice firewall, but I've seen better coding skills with my cat!"

I switched tactics, cladded in Quadra-elementals I leaped, "Going up!" I shouted, launching myself high into the air. Abberath looked up, momentarily stunned. "Now, let's see how you like this!" I shouted, diving down with Sanchomo aimed straight for his heart.

With a desperate roar, Abberath tried to incinerate me mid-air, but my Fiery Haven absorbed the flames. I plunged Sanchomo into his heart, the blade slicing through molten flesh. Abberath's flames flickered wildly, then began to die out. "Looks like you're all fired up," I said, "and nowhere to burn."

As Abberath crumbled into ash, the landscape around us began to cool. The rivers of lava hardened into black rock, and the infernal heat dissipated. "Well, that was a workout," I said, panting slightly. "How about we celebrate with some well-earned rest?"

I returned to the igloo where my trio was waiting. "Mission accomplished, team," I said, collapsing onto a rock that was still warm but no longer scorching. "Now, who wants to roast marshmallows?"

You guys ever wonder why shoes were made? Not how, but why?

I mean, think about it: at some point, our ancient ancestors were trudging through dirt, rocks, and who knows what else, probably grumbling about how their feet hurt. And then one day, someone had the bright idea to wrap their feet in something protective. Genius!

But beyond the obvious "to protect our feet" reason, there's a whole cultural and societal aspect to shoes. Shoes have evolved from simple foot coverings into symbols of status, fashion statements, and even cultural identifiers. In some places, the type of shoe you wear can indicate your social standing or profession. High heels, sneakers, boots—they all tell a story about who we are or who we want to be.

Plus, shoes have practical benefits beyond just protection. They can improve our posture, enhance athletic performance, and even affect our health. Imagine trying to run a marathon barefoot or showing up to a fancy event in nothing but your bare feet. Shoes give us versatility and adaptability in different environments and social settings.

So, while the initial why might have been about comfort and protection, shoes have grown to play a much larger role in our lives. They’re an essential part of our identity, culture, and daily routine. And honestly, can you imagine life without them?

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