Wisdom of the Goddess

The road trip is quite nice. Gorgeous views roll past us as our carriage advances on this seemingly endless dirt road toward the capital of a Theocracy worshiping the little girl whose hair is trying to fly into my mouth.

Admittedly, it's getting quite hot under this layer of cloth and reinforced armor. I guess the Exosuit is protective against extreme flames, not moderate, sweat-inducing late-morning heat.

Astra brushes her golden hair out from her face and asks, "So, Kris, what's your world like?"

"Earth?" I say, "Miserable when compared to this."

"Miserable? Why?"

I chuckle.

"I am not the one to answer that question. I was living the absolutely least miserable life out of every single person back there."

"And yet you still came here, to do what? Seek refuge for your miserable friends?"

"I suppose."

Astra takes my answer in for a second. I look over to her, and she is gazing into the distant fields, with what on her mind no mortal could ever guess.

"Well, what made your world miserable?" Astra asks.

"Oh, many, many factors contributed to an endless cycle of decline, but it all started with the invention of science."

"Like mathematics and astronomy and stuff like that?"

"No, not really. They've been around for quite some time. What really caused the downfall was when we humans abandoned God and chose science over Him."

"So, you do have a God in your world."

"No, we never did, but the people believed we did, at least until science made us cocky. We built towers, higher and higher, trying to intrude into the heavens. We dug holes, deeper and deeper, trying to harness the flames of hell. We believed we were gods ourselves and drowned in this immortality complex when all of a sudden, mortality stopped us dead in our tracks."

"So what? Nature retaliated?" Astra asks.

"Exactly."

"You humans, utter fools. I am surprised you survived this long without us deities there to aid you. What caused your people to stray from your beliefs?"

"Greed, mostly. I am one of such. Power and status don't align with devotion. We'd like to believe that there is no God, so we can guiltlessly indulge in our desires, and also, it just wasn't possible. If an all-benevolent God did exist, why were there still so much pain and suffering in the world."

"An all-benevolent God? There's no such thing," Astra says.

Hearing that from the mouth of a child is quite bizarre.

"Yeah," I say, "I can see that. It's not like the people in Alventyr are living their best lives."

"No, they are. Did you see the smiles on their faces when you gave them that coin? You brought them benevolence."

"But isn't that your job?"

"Benevolence isn't something you get for free, Kris. It's something you have to earn. If everyone was just happy all the time, there would no such thing as happiness. I don't erase all evil from this world, and I am not sure that I have the ability to. It's a test. Those who overcome this evil will experience the world of benevolence that I built for them, because they are those who deserve it."

"But that's not always the case, is it?" I say, "There are good people who have bad things happen to them, and there are bad people who have good things happen to them."

"Yes, of course, but who's to say what's good or what's bad?"

"You?"

"Okay, yes, but that's not what I meant. Those who act with unequivocal selflessness, are they really sacrificing something? Or are they just doing what seems to be normal to them? Being born with a good heart doesn't automatically grant you the benefits of my benevolence, Kris. You need to earn for it."

"So a naturally good person can't have happiness?" I ask.

"No, of course not, that's not what I'm saying. A naturally good person needs to put in just as much effort as someone who isn't. They need to face adversities and come out intact, but those adversities are not mine to determine, but their surroundings'. Many times, such adversities are too great, and these good-hearted people don't manage to make it out intact, but such is life. They still have better chances than those who act astray, though, as they have no sin they need to atone for."

"But you can't say 'such is life'. You are in charge of everyone's life."

Astra tilts her head.

"What do you expect from me? I am not omnipotent. I got blasted out of my domain by a little twat. I can't watch over every single person in this world and deliver fair judgment. Occasionally, those who are truly devout, I can hear their voices, and I answer to their call of distress, but they are only a few. My church calls them saints, and everyone aspires to have their own portrait hung in that hall of saints. Do you think I will grant everyone that privilege? No, it's another trial the reward of which is reserved only for those who are worthy."

I sit in silence as listen to the pearl of wisdom handed to me by the Goddess. Indeed, there would be no point in an all-benevolent or omnipotent God, but if everything is just a test, what am I doing? Is this also a test for me? The fate of humanity rests on the result of which? And from whom did I receive this preposterous test?

As the top of a forest begins to peek over the horizon in the distance, the plains are coming to an end in front of us. We will soon be heading into thick woods.

Another carriage is also driving ahead of us, and it just entered the forest.

It's a weird-looking one. I can only see it from behind, and there is no cabin. It's just a huge box covered by a brown tarp, blocking my view from what is inside. It probably belongs to a merchant or something carrying goods that should best be kept out of sunlight.

The carriage is moving at a rather slow pace, and we are catching up. The distance between us and the forest is closing. Maybe I can ask the driver what they are selling and see what the economic situation is like in Terradivina. Or I guess I can just ask the Goddess.

"Hey, Astra," I say, "What's the trading like in Terradivina?"

"Were you not listening just now? I told you I don't care about these details. The people have to figure them out themselves."

"But you have to know something about it."

"No, why would I want to?"

Well, Astra suddenly became a lot more useless in my mind.