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Being a God Sucked, so I Quit

He was bored. Really, really bored. It's been countless years since he ascended from the lower realms and became a god, abstaining from all mortal desires for cultivation. However, becoming an immortal was the worst decision he has ever made! Flirt? All the goddesses were either taken or chaste to the point of nunhood. Cultivate? He was already at the peak and there was nowhere left to go. "F*ck it, I'm out of this sh*thole." Yu Tian finally had enough and used his Qi to blow himself out of the Nine Heavens. Hence, a new life begins. Yu Tian wishes to enjoy it peacefully, but fate had other plans in store. When his lost memories and mysterious past catches up with him, will he still remember how to be... Human? Chapter updates are usually once every few days. If I gain more supporters, am willing to try to do one chapter a day. Maybe more than one chapter a day if I get enough support. (WARNING: THERE ARE SWEAR WORDS IN THIS BOOK) Special thanks for those who donated the most powerstones (Top 3): Pandarun Me 2shadowx Also a special thank you to everyone else who had voted and supported my book.

Helldragon_xd · 奇幻
分數不夠
32 Chs

Long Qing Yuan's Visit

"Old brother, why didn't you tell me you were coming?" Li You Zi nervously asked.

Long Qing Yuan sat in the guest room with Yan Yu, sipping hot oolong tea. Both of them had just arrived in Stardust City, immediately heading for the Li clan.

Recognizing Master Long instantly, the guards immediately let them in and notified the patriarch.

"My apologies, You Zi. I didn't want to make a big scene of my visit." Long Qing Yuan put his teacup down. "I came because my apprentice had a little accident last time, and wanted to come to have a chat."

"Ah." Li You Zi felt his heart drop.

His grandson had broken the awakening stone, and it was only after that he learned how precious one of those tools are, as well as the fortune required for an alchemist to produce one.

The Li Clan had no chance in paying the cost for another one unless they sold all of their assets. However, how would their family be able to survive if they did so?

"Qing Yuan... I... Our family is very sorry about that incident." The patriarch could only hang his head in shame.

He turned to a male servant in the room. "Get Yu Tian over here, now!"

There was a brief, awkward silence as they waited. A moment later, Long Qing Yuan stared curiously at the little boy who waddled into the room. His attention seemed to be distracted by Yan Yu.

"Why aren't you kneeling for forgiveness?" Li You Zi roared when seeing his grandson.

He tried to use his Qi to force Yu Tian to his knees, but was stunned when it only knocked the boy a bit off balance. "Huh?"

"It's fine." Long Qing Yuan also noticed the irregularity. He raised a hand in front of Li You Zi, stopping his actions. "Is this the little friend who broke the awakening stone?"

"En." Li You Zi nodded.

"This is Yu Tian, my..." He hesitated mid-speech. "Grandson."

Yu Tian gave him an odd glance before finally looking up at the stranger in the room. It was an old man, with white hair and a tall stature but slightly hunched over, wearing a uniform with similar colours of green and white like Yan Yu.

Yu Tian assumed this grandpa was Master Long, who usually did the annual aptitude tests for the Li clan. Both intelligent eyes finally crossed gazes.

Long Qing Yuan's gaze was of interest, while Yu Tian's was filled with boredom. He really didn't want to look at this boring old man. The pretty sister in the room was much more pleasing to his eyes.

Internally sighing, Yu Tian felt that he should at least put on an act due to breaking the awakening stone incident. The former god bowed apologetically. "I am the one responsible, Master Long. I'm sorry."

Carefully observing the boy, Long Qing Yuan suddenly broke into a huge smile. "You Zi, can the 4 of us talk together privately?"

The Li clan's patriarch was confused, but he acquiesced to his friend's request. Calling all the servants out of the room, only Long Qing Yuan, Yan Yu, Yu Tian, and himself remained.

Yu Tian resisted the impulse to hit the old man, who suddenly began to feel around his body.

The former god wanted to swear badly and curse all 19 generations of Long Qing Yuan's future descendants. Fuck this old pervert!

"Call out your martial spirit please." Controlling himself, Yu Tian summoned Qiu Xue out.

"Unbelievable." Long Qing Yuan observed the little kitten too but didn't touch her. He really couldn't see or feel an aura coming from this martial spirit, yet a big smile was plastered on his face.

Yan Yu calmly watched her mentor continue to perform his tests on Yu Tian. In reality, she was just as confused as the Li clan members, because Yan Yu had no idea what Long Qing Yuan was doing.

The young woman suddenly paled. Yan Yu also didn't know why her mentor was so interested in the young boy. Long Qing Yuan couldn't have those kinds of hobbies... Would he?

Yan Yu only became his apprentice 2 years ago. She closed her eyes and shook her head to free away those dirty thoughts. No way. There was no way her mentor would be someone so perverted and vile.

Opening her eyes, Yan Yu turned more white when she saw Long Qing Yuan go back to touching the horrified Yu Tian. His big, old hands continued to feel and press around the boy's chest and bottom.

"This is fascinating. Absolutely fascinating!" Long Qing Yuan's eyes shined. His breathing became heavy and laboured, his smile turning fanatical. "No, this is amazing!"

"Erm, Qing Yuan." Even Li You Zi started being uncomfortable. "Is everything alright?"

The Li patriarch's mind began to be plagued with unclean thoughts like Yan Yu's, thinking that his old friend had taken up a nasty hobby.

However, if it meant that sacrificing Yu Tian would compensate for the awakening stone, Li You Yi found himself seriously contemplating it.

Disgusted, Yu Tian finally squirmed out of the vile grandpa's grasp, cuddling Qiu Xue who also wore a rather similar look on her feline features. He immediately pressed back to the farthest side of the room's wall. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Yu Tian extended his internal cursing to the old man's entire family line be doomed to all wear green hats.

"I can't believe it." Long Qing Yuan shook his head in amazement, a crazed look on his face.

He grabbed his old friend's shoulders, terrifying him. Long Qing Yuan's breathing was now fully gasping in excitement. "You Zi, your grandson is a genius! A true genius!"

Li You Zi was stunned again, giving Long Qing Yuan a strange look. Turning to Yu Tian, he only sensed his grandson to be at the Qi Novice stage. Not only that, the cat he had in his hands seemed to be the lowest grade of martial spirit.

"Are... You sure?" Li You Zi hesitantly asked.

Yan Yu had the exact same doubt. She found nothing special about Yu Tian and was wondering what in the world could her mentor be seeing in the small boy.

"Yes! I'm certain!" Long Qing Yuan suddenly took out a large book and slammed it onto the table. A few of the teacups were knocked off and shattered against the floor. "Look at this!"

Shooting a dirty look at the old pervert, even Yu Tian found himself approaching to get a better look at the page it was open at.

"Divine War Physique?" Yan Yu read the unfamiliar term.

"Yes! The Divine War Physique!" Long Qing Yuan praised. "You Zi! Your grandson has a unique physique!"

"You mean those rare body conditions that occur at birth?" Remembering what unique physiques are, Li You Zi's eyes also began to shine.

Yu Tian found all of this idiotic, staring with deadpan eyes. He had never heard of the term, and he didn't care too much. Sitting down, the former god gently nuzzled and gave Qiu Xue soft pats, causing the little kitten to purr.

Seeing the cute animal, Yan Yu gave into her female urges and also wanted to touch Qiu Xue. However, the kitten suddenly hissed at her and pressed against Yu Tian's body, stunning them both.

"Oh, I'm sorry then." Yan Yu apologized to the cat, who had her head held high in disdain.

Long Qing Yuan pointed to a section, filled with his own notes. "A long time ago, when awakening stones weren't invented yet, cultivators had to awaken their Qi naturally."

"In turn, this caused a delay in humans awakening their Qi, meaning most were unable to step into even the Qi Novice stage until the late teens." The old instructor explained.

"Furthermore, this caused an even larger delay for martial spirits condensing. Unlike now, Martial Kings back then could be considered the peak cultivation stage, with the number of cultivators being less than a handful." Long Qing Yuan went back to the page of the Divine War Physique.

Yu Tian frowned. He couldn't remember anything about martial spirits in his past life, and they didn't seem to exist at all when he was just a human cultivator back then.

"So back then, the unique physiques were considered the best in determining aptitude. Every cultivator who awakened Qi could condense a martial spirit, but you were already well into adulthood at that time." Long Qing Yuan turned his shining eyes back to Yu Tian, who gave him a dirty look back.

"So the grades also weren't given for martial spirits at the time either. Therefore, only the cultivators were unique physiques were considered talented." Yan Yu realized, enlightened.

"You're absolutely correct!" Long Qing Yuan was proud of his best student for deducing this conclusion.

"Unique physiques was so rare, that in a population of 50000, only 500 cultivators would have one. Not only that, but most of the unique physiques weren't even good, and the rarest ones might not even be on one of those 500 people." He continued.

"So what is this Divine War Physique, Qing Yuan?" Li You Zi spoke up. He was curious if this unique physique was as good as its name. The old instructor grinned.

He shot a piercing gaze at Yu Tian, who shuddered in response. "Simply speaking, it's considered one of the highest tiers of unique physiques. Yu Tian will be a natural in combat and learning martial arts."

"In fact," Long Qing Yuan's eyes narrowed. "I would say the value of this physique is equal to a base tier emperor grade martial spirit.

Hearing his words, the room fell into a deathly silence. Frankly, Yu Tian didn't care, but if this bullshit physique can somehow fix the problem of replacing the awakening stone, then he'll take it.

"Old friend, how are you so sure my grandson has this Divine War Physique?" Li You Zi was still a bit skeptical.

Long Qing Yuan pointed to several lines of text. "After awakening stones were invented, people found out that the Divine War Physiques would break them due to how strong their Qi awakening was. It doesn't matter if the boy's martial spirit is of the lowest grade, his physique makes up for it fifty... No! One hundred times over!"

"However, many people have already forgotten about unique physiques, due to how rare they are." Long Qing Yuan chuckled. "Only us old scholars and some doctors still remember and study it at times."

"In regards to the broken awakening stone, don't worry about it." The old man broke out into laughter and waved his hand. "However, please keep our meeting today private. I need some time to find a replacement."

"I'll deal with it in the academy. Until then, keep nurturing this boy. I'm sure he'll make his name in the Jianghu one day." Long Qing Yuan smiled.

Unbeknownst to Long Qing Yuan, he had no idea just how right he was. Or rather, how wrong he was in how much he underestimated Yu Tian.

...

"Yu Tian!" Li Mei Ling called, looking for her son.

The woman couldn't find her father anywhere to plead with him for help. Heading back to Yu Tian's room, she found her son missing as well.

It was completely logical that she'd be worried sick. The servants present all said they had no idea, making her unsure if they were telling the truth or just lying to spite her.

"Mother, I am here." Li Mei Ling turned to find her son exiting one of the guest rooms, with her father behind him. Beside them were a familiar old man and a pretty young woman.

Strangely, the mother noticed that Li You Zi was in an oddly happy mood. However, what was more important on her mind was Yu Tian's wellbeing.

"Son!" Glomping Yu Tian, the former god squirmed in embarrassment as his mother began to plant kisses all over his face. Long Qing Yuan and Yan Yu both laughed goodnaturedly at the young boy's plight.

"Oh! Master Long." Bowing respectfully, the young mother finally greeted them. She looked at Yan Yu. "This miss is?"

"I'm Yan Yu, and I'm his apprentice." Yan Yu gave a respectful bow back.

After exchanging formalities and seeing that Yu Tian was fine, she decided to ask her father to talk privately. Li You Zi accepted and commanded his grandson to see them off, after he paid farewells to Long Qing Yuan.

...

"Yan Yu, can you go prepare the carriage? I still want to speak to our little friend here." Long Qing Yuan asked his apprentice.

He was also a War Grandmaster like Li You Zi, capable of flying. However, in his twilight years, the old instructor wasn't able to continuously use his Qi for long periods of time.

Yu Tian's eyes narrowed in wariness. This old pervert wasn't going to feel him up again, right?

Seeing Yan Yu leave, Long Qing Yuan turned his attention back to the boy. His facial features were suddenly serious.

"Little friend, do you only have 1 martial spirit?" He questioned Yu Tian quietly.

The Divine War Physique could only break the awakening stone. However, Yu Tian had completely shattered the tool during his Qi awakening. By only having a unique physique of the highest tier, it still wouldn't decimate the awakening stone into those fragmented pieces.

The former god raised an eyebrow. Maybe this old man's knowledge knew something about what he saw.

"When I broke the awakening stone, I also saw something black coming out from my right hand." Yu Tian admitted. "However, it disappeared back into my body and I can't feel it anymore."

Long Qing Yuan's eyes widened at the confession. His original thoughts were correct after all. Not only did the boy in front of him have the Divine War Physique, he even possesses a second martial spirit.

"Did you see anything else from that day?" The old instructor asked solemnly.

Thinking that there weren't any issues with telling the truth, Yu Tian told him everything. "The awakening stone turned into all of the colours from green to red, and then black to white."

Taking a step back, the stare that Long Qing Yuan gave to Yu Tian was now filled with horror. His head snapped around, making sure that no one was eavesdropping nearby.

"Whatever you do, do not reveal that you have dual martial spirits until you are strong enough." He gravely warned Yu Tian. "There are factions and families unimaginably more powerful than the Li clan. They can not only wipe out your whole family, but even the entire Holy Qilin Empire, and do anything to bring your talent under their control."

"Do you hear me?" He growled aggressively. Yu Tian nodded, slightly shaken by the old man's reaction.

"Good. Once your cultivation is high enough, your second spirit will naturally reveal itself." Long Qing Yuan informed him.

He also did some research on Yu Tian's background. Growing up without knowing his father was quite pitiful, but Long Qing Yuan knew that he couldn't be any ordinary cultivator. To produce a child of heaven-defying talent like this was only possible from the clans in the higher planes.

"So you need to focus on cultivation." Long Qing Yuan instructed Yu Tian, handing him a small box.

"What's this?" The former god opened it up, revealing several strange plants and fruits.

Sensing the abundance of natural Qi in them, Yu Tian recognized that they were cultivation resources.

"Once you reach the rank of Qi Warrior, I will personally invite you to Celestial Academy myself." Staring into the boy's eyes, the instructor promised.

Nothing really new in this chapter, but I hope that everyone can vote or leave a review to support me. Thank you!

1. Green Hat = Chinese way of saying being cheated on. In the old days, a male wearing a green hat would mean that his wife has cheated on him.

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