11

This life that I'd built began to unravel after Lacy's death, marking the end for me.

I had been living with Jade and Saffron for almost three years by now, and I suppose that one could say that I was used to living with two demons. Life had become a bit of a routine, say for the disagreements between the two from time to time.

It was becoming obvious that these two had begun competing for my attention. Why? I had no clue. But the air in the household turned hostile very easily, and it ended up coming to a head shortly after Lacy died, although it was also turned unexpectedly towards me.

It all started with a nightmare, from which I woke up in a cold sweat. I was breathing hard as I stared at the ceiling and did my best to process that I was now awake. This nightmare had been very vivid, more than any I'd ever had before.

But perhaps the most frightening aspect of it for me was the sensation that it had also been a premonition of what was to come.

I can still recall it very clearly. I stood at the edge of a tall, rocky cliff, looking down at the churning ocean below. I didn't know where I was, or why I was there. The landscape around me was misty and desolate, an oceanside that I'd never seen before.

But as I stood there, I had the sudden sensation that someone was behind me. I spun around and stared in fright at the sight of my beaten and broken dead husband. He was covered in blood, his body contorted from his broken bones, some of which protruded from his skin. His head hung to the side at an unnatural angle from a severely bent broken neck.

He wasn't alone either. Lacy Manson stood beside him, now burned almost beyond recognition. The smell of her burnt flesh was overwhelming, and I swore I saw portions of her skin that were still sizzling.

Both stared at me with dead eyes, the feeling of hatred radiating from them. They blamed me for their deaths. I was the one who had cursed them to such terrible fates, and they wanted me to pay for what I had done.

I took a step back, and the cliff behind me began to crumble. I gasped, unconsciously attempting to move myself forward even though I knew I could end up running right into Leo and Lacy.

But it wasn't them that I fell forward into. Instead, it was Saffron. He was now standing where I'd seen Leo and Lacy, and there was no sign of them ever being there.

"Did I scare you?" he asked, giving me that familiar smile.

"You scared the hell out of me! What is going on here?" I demanded.

By then, I'd become a bit more comfortable in my skin on confronting him and Jade over such things. As Jade had told me before that as long as I was alive, they were under my control and had to follow any orders I gave them.

Saffron continued to smile, "You're honestly that frightened of them? You're so afraid that you even worry about them invading your dreams?" he responded.

"Of course not." I lied, "Leo and Lacy are dead, so I'm not afraid of either of them. I have no need to fear anyone anymore."

Saffron took a step forward, "Is that so?"

I took a step back but stopped as I was reminded of the cliff behind me. Saffron grabbed me and forced me to turn around, holding my back against him.

"Tell me this. If you trust us so much, why do you fear being so close to the edge of this cliff?"

"It's a normal fear. All humans fear falling to their deaths." I answered, though I knew it was only a half truth. I had another fear too. It spawned from my distrust of him in this situation.

"I don't believe you. However, I will acknowledge that you have always been a smart girl, so I'll let you in on a little secret." Saffron continued.

He leaned closer to my ear, and I shivered feeling his breath against it. But it was his whisper to me that brought out a cold fear unlike any I'd ever had before.

"I've grown tired of you, and if you do not end this contract, I will be sure to kill you."

I woke up right as he shoved off of that cliff. Now that I was able to regain my senses, I sat up in the bed and looked around. Jade wasn't there, but that didn't surprise me. He normally didn't go to sleep beside me until around three in the morning. I didn't know what he did in the meantime, but then, I really didn't want to.

Yet I couldn't stop the chill that had crept up my spine. That dream had been far too real, and as I was falling off that cliff, I could've sworn that I saw the ocean open up into a pit of fire. Was I dreaming of my fall to Hell for what I'd done?

I didn't know for sure. All I really knew was the uncertainty I felt towards my future. Were Jade and Saffron planning on killing me? Would they do that when they got the chance so that the contract was done and they could claim my soul? Perhaps all of their bickering was getting to them. Maybe they wanted to end it all, and to do that, they needed to be rid of me.

I finally got out of the bed, going over to the door and opening it as quietly as I could to peek into the hallway. The house was dark, say for a slight illumination from the living room. I took in a breath to keep myself composed and stepped out of the room so that I could see who was out there. I had a thinly veiled hope that it would be Jade.

This hope was dashed as I reached the end of the hallway. Saffron was sitting on the couch, quietly looking at a book with a pleasant smile on his face. The image of him smiling in my nightmare flashed through my mind. Now that I was thinking clearer, why had I only seen him in it? Not to mention the fact that he'd said that he would eventually kill me.

I believe it was then that I began understanding that Saffron could be infinity crueler than Jade, and the events that followed would prove that to me.

Saffron sensed my presence right away, "Well, I see that you're awake. Did you have a nightmare?" he asked, still smiling.

"Yes. How did you know?" I answered hesitantly.

"It's written all over your face. You look absolutely petrified." Saffron pointed out. He stood up, making his way over to me.

"I am not." I managed to squeak out.

Saffron held my arm, pulling me into the middle of the den room with him, "You're not a very good liar, are you? You must have been dreaming pf something terrifying to be this afraid." he continued.

He moved behind me, and I froze as he pulled me back against him. I tried to pull away, but his grip was far too strong, bordering on painful.

"Let me go Saffron!" I protested.

But his grip didn't loosen at all, "Tell me something Faith. When you entered into this contract, did you think that perhaps you were making a mistake?" he asked me.

I decided to just go with it. If letting Saffron think that he was in control would help me until Jade got there, then I'd play along.

"No. I knew what I was doing. If I was going to die, then I was going to take him with me." I answered.

"I see. You're rather vengeful in the end, aren't you? But it appears that your life hasn't exactly been a bed of roses either. I should know. I did a lot of checking up on you."

"What do you mean?"

Saffron chuckled, "Just what I said. Do you really think that Jade's picking you for your selfish wish was a chance thing? No. Nothing like this is ever chance. You were chosen long before you ever laid eyes on that petty bastard that you ordered dead."

"What?"

I was in shock. That couldn't have been right. I had called for Jade. I'd prayed for him and he'd answered my prayers.

"You still have a lot to learn little girl. You're far too naive to be playing house with us. But I suppose that I can have some pity on you, so for now, I will tell you two things. You will have to figure out which is a lie, and which is a truth." Saffron whispered in my ear.

I somehow managed to nod. My heart was beating so hard that it felt like it would come out of my chest, and the strangling sensation I'd been feeling since I laid eyes on him was getting heavier.

"Here they are." Saffron continued whispering, "The first is for your own knowledge, and that is that I am not a separate being from Jade. I am him. I am simply a different projection that he's given to use you. The second is how you may escape from this contract. Let's just say we're feeling a bit sorry for you, considering the awful truths of your mother. If you want to escape the painful death that he has planned, then you must make your own. You'll need to end your own life."

His words echoed in my mind long after he let me go and vanished. I felt so numb that I could only retreat to my room and lock the door. It was rather stupid, considering the fact that Jade and Saffron could enter a room whenever they wanted to, but it was all that I could do to keep my sanity at that point.

I ended up spending the rest of that night hiding in there, mulling over his every word.

What he'd said about my mother had been true. It was the whole reason that I'd been raised by my grandmother in the first place. My mother was a very unstable person from the time that I was born. I never knew my father, and my grandmother apparently didn't know who he was either.

I spent the first six years of my life watching my mother slowly drag herself down. She took many pills, and often had terrible cuts and bruises on her arms and legs that were self-inflicted. Several times she was sent to asylums, yet they always ended up sending her home to my grandmother. I never knew why. Perhaps it was the product of overcrowding, or the influence that my grandfather had left behind with his family's status.

This cycle ended right after I turned six years old. That was when her life ended. She'd fashioned a noose from some rope that she'd found at nearby worksite and hung herself on our porch.

I can recall so well when we returned home and discovered her body, yet I'd felt nothing as I stared at it. Instead, a coldness had wrapped itself around me. She was gone, and nothing was ever going to bring the nut job back. That last part had been my grandmother's words, but I have always sadly viewed them as the truth.

But something else that Saffron had told me disturbed me much more. Something that I knew was probably part of the truth in his lies. That was the fact that I had not been picked randomly just for my terrible prayers. From the time that I could remember, I'd often awoken in the middle of the night to see a dark form standing at the end of my bed. Even after I'd married Leo, the form returned from time to time. Sometimes, I would see it out of the corner of my eye as well. It returned more and more as Leo's abuse began.

Yet, I never feared it. Even as a young child, it was like the dark form was a comfort for me. Now it made me wonder if Saffron was right, and I had been chosen for all of this long ago. Maybe the course of my life had already been drawn out to bring me here.

I'd made up my mind about things as the morning down. I slipped out of my bed, heading to the wardrobe and pulling out my favorite pink dress. After getting my hair straight and my make up on, I slipped out into the living room, but there was no sign of anyone else being there.

I paid that no mind, only grabbing my keys and heading out to the car. I knew what I had to do, and I felt oddly numb about it. That numbness continued eating away at me as I drove to the train station. I'd spent my entire life feeling like the odds were stacked against me. Perhaps my mother had the right idea back then. Ending your life was far better than suffering through it.

Besides, I knew that I didn't want to spend the rest of eternity trapped by a demon in Hell, and if I was going anyway, this wouldn't make much difference, would it?

The train station stairs were crowded, though this was normal for this time of morning. I kept looking up at the sky as I walked down those stairs, taking in the sight of the clouds one last time and thinking about the angels in Heaven. I knew that I would never be among them now. Lacy's last message to me echoed in my head as I walked.

He'll try to take her back.

I did not believe that anything would try to save me now. I made my pact, and there was only one way out of it. I did not believe what Saffron had told me about him just being a projection of Jade either. However, I did believe that he'd told me the truth of how to get out of this. He would not need to lie about it. After all, it would give Jade back to him, and now I was willing to do so. I didn't want to dream of Leo or Lacy like that anymore. I didn't want to live in fear. I would escape it all.

I finally arrived at the platform of the train station, sitting on the bench as I waited for the next train. I glanced at the nearby clock, noting the time. The next train would be speeding through in three minutes. I could make myself ready in that time.

"Where are you heading off to so suddenly?"

I stiffened as I heard the familiar voice, slowly turning my head to my left. Jade was standing there, looking perplexed at my sudden decision to come there.

I did my best to brush him off, "Nowhere at this time. I simply came here because I wished to."

"You must have something in mind to be here." Jade persisted.

I looked forward at the nearby tracks, changing the subject while keeping my voice even, "Where were you last night? You didn't come home."

He was quiet for a moment. I took it that he was thinking of an excuse.

"I was finishing some things that needed to be taken care of. I came home, but I found that you were already gone, so I came to retrieve you." he finally answered.

"Did you see Saffron? He wasn't there this morning when I got up, but I did see him last night." I continued.

"No, I did not. But it doesn't concern me. He tends to take off to his own accord, and it's better that way. I'd rather he just returned now instead of causing so much trouble." Jade responded.

"Returned huh?" I muttered.

It was nearly time for that first train to come through, so I slowly stood up.

Jade followed me over to the line by the tracks.

"What are you planning here? You're not seriously thinking of being the coward your pathetic mother was."

I turned to him, "How did you know about that?" I demanded.

"What do you mean? I know everything about you. I always have." Jade reminded me. He looked shocked now.

I wasn't about to listen to any excuses from him. Not with all of the turmoil I'd endured throughout the previous night.

"You know exactly what I mean! You were the one who told me that last night!" I cried.

The two of us stared at each other after my accusation. As odd as it seems, Jade looked unnerved now.

"Did he do something to you?" he finally spoke.

I was about to respond when I suddenly felt a distinct chill in the air. An eerie silence enveloped the entire station as the people disappeared into the shadows that overtook it. I couldn't move as they did. A bitter cold wrapped itself around me, freezing me in place.

"Are you that surprised?" I heard Saffron say from behind me.

Jade's eyes narrowed as he looked at him standing behind me with an arm draped over my shoulders.

"You did this. You've been plotting this entire time." he growled.

"Of course. It was easier than I thought too. You really should've known better than to write me into this contract. After all, you were the one who'd always wanted her in the first place. One cannot blame one for a bit of jealousy." Saffron chided him, pulling me back against him tighter.

I gasped as I felt pressure against my chest. It was getting a bit harder to breath as he held me like this.

The contract glowed in Jade's eye, "I wrote you in and I can write you out, so I'd suggest that you let her go before I tear you apart." he warned him.

"Not quite." Saffron countered, "You see, when one is written into a contract, one can also rewrite it. Don't think that I don't know what went on here. This is a soul that you've been following for a very long time. This was the soul that you truly fell for, and I don't plan on being a replacement for it."

"What did you do?!" Jade demanded, growing angrier. He attempted to move, but couldn't. Shadows had wrapped around him, binding him to where he stood. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't pull free of them.

I could sense Saffron's satisfied smile, "Just a little rewrite in my favor. Let us play a game Jade. If you want her so badly, then chase her shadow through the generations. If you manage to catch it and defeat me, then you can have her back. Until then, feel free to witness her death for eternity."

It felt like my consciousness was pushed to the back of my mind as he spoke. I could see through my eyes, yet my body moved on its own. The train station returned to how it was before, and I could see that Jade was still there, still trapped in place. It was the last vision that I would see before I jumped in front of the train roaring down the tracks at full speed.

Before the first death took me.