Worry

Lunchtime ended soon, signaled by the ringing of the school bell.

Monika used her chopsticks to pick up the last bit of rice on her tray and nibbled on it. It was as though she had perfectly budgeted her time to finish her meal right when the period ended.

As for me...

Despite having more food than Monika, I finished a while ago. I ended up spending a while just watching Monika slowly eat her food. Although it couldn't be considered eventful, there was something satisfying watching her eat her food in such a refined way.

Monika set down her chopsticks. She picked up a tissue with her index finger and thumb. Then, she dabbed her soft pink lips with it.

It was only now that I realized the outside of my mouth was covered in the remains of my meal. I instinctively raised my sleeve and was about to wipe my lips, but froze before I did so.

...Monika used a tissue even when there was hardly anything on her lips.

I cleared my throat in an attempt to dispel some of the awkwardness.

I failed.

Monika smiled sweetly. She simply looked at me wordlessly.

I quickly lowered my sleeve and grabbed a tissue. I dabbed my lips, but ended up making a bigger mess on my face. With flushed cheeks, I hurriedly wiped crudely.

Monika stood up from the table and unhurriedly put on her light green backpack. She picked up her tray with both hands and flashed a beautiful smile. Once again, I was sent into a garden of flowers. Monika was in that garden, inviting me in.

"Goodbye Sayori. See you again soon!"

I blinked a few times before abruptly shaking my head.

"Ah, g-goodbye!"

Monika left with her tray in hand. I watched her leave for a few more moments before tidying up as well. A thought swirled in my mind...

I wanted to see Monika's smile a little more, hehe.

...

Monika cheered me up, but it didn't take long for me to feel despondent once again. I was sitting at the front of math class, feeling my mind whirl in confusion.

The math teacher raised a piece of chalk and drew various symbols on the chalkboard with several successive sharp taps. The math teacher turned to us and began the lecture.

"Alright. Last time, we reviewed the basics of what you learned last year. Now, we will work on limits as you can see on the board here."

The math teacher tapped on the chalkboard with the piece of chalk, right on some strange symbol.

"The limit is essentially the slope of a line or the instantaneous acceleration..."

It did not take long for me to completely lose track of what the teacher was saying. Although I struggled in philosophy, it was also my first time being exposed to those strange concepts.

As for math... I've taken it multiple times, but only because it was a mandatory course. By some miracle, I was able to pass with low sixties in those other times. For some reason, my mind just couldn't follow math. It was kinda like falling off a kayak and forgetting which way led back to the start.

...That may or may not have happened to me once, hehe.

I squinted my eyes and leaned forward in my seat. I tried really hard to pay attention. I really really did!

But the words the teacher said went in one of my ears and out the other. Although I told myself this was really important, my interest quickly died down. It was hard to focus when it just felt like I was being whisked away in the tides.

A small pout formed on my face. I held the end on my pencil and swung it from side to side. My thoughts wandered until they eventually landed on Natsuki.

Why didn't she show up for lunch?

Monika said that the school was a safe place, which it was. But... I couldn't help but feel uneasy.

What could've been the reason for Natsuki's absence?

Did she get in trouble with the teacher?

Did she have something to do?

I let out a soft sigh and lowered my head. My eyes slowly closed as my worries grew. Bad thoughts continued to swarm through my head, slowly spiraling down the rabbit hole.

Then, the bell rang.

I shook my head and blinked a few times.

Ah, it was time for gym class now.