#29 I Won't Live Long

To summarize things, after last night's dinner, mother said she wanted to talk to me in the living room so I went. She asked if I wanted to meet my fiance but that wasn't her main point. She just wanted to tell me she won't live long and told me I was dismissed so I headed back to my room.

'It's a genetic disease, Andrea knows it too.'

Does that mean, I'll get it too when I get older? 'I feel like meeting grandma again.'

This time, I didn't leave secretly. I let Alice drive me there while my sister tagged along.

"Miss, it's almost time for dinner, why not we go another day?"

"No, I will forget."

Luckily I finished my assignments in school so I had nothing to worry about. I wonder if Eric's visiting his grandmother again today?

We got the room card from the receptionist and entered the room. I was surprised when I saw Eric beside grandma, talking to her.

"What are you doing here?" I questioned him, confused.

"That's my line." He said and nodded his head as a greeting to Alice and my sister.

"Oh my, we've been found out."

Found out? "Alice, what do you mean?"

My sister seemed to have known this too. Grandma was silent the whole time so I think she must have known something. It was only Eric and I who didn't know what was going on.

I sat on the chair beside grandma's bed and greeted her before Alice explained things to us.

"Miss and the young master are relatives. Both of your mothers are Mrs. Calnan's daughters."

I was so confused but that wasn't my main concern. 'Does that mean my feelings can never reach him?' Even if it did, we're related by blood so it's impossible for him to return them.

Why didn't Andrea tell me this when I talked to her about it last time? Jeez! Bringing my hopes up.

I looked at Eric to see what expression he had and to my surprise, it was disappointment. I didn't know why but when I looked at him, I remembered the photo from grandma's mansion.

"Grandma, is that photo..." Grandma smiled in response. It was a smile like her mission was completed.

"Finally, I can rest peacefully. I hope you get along with him, Amana. Eric, you too." She shut her eyelids with her lips tweaked up. There was a sound that sounded like something just ended. I looked at the screen beside me, only to see the graph of grandma's heart beat became a straight line.

"...Grandma...?"

Tears rolled down my cheeks before I knew it. My sister hugged me while holding back her tears.

We haven't thanked her for those delicious food she made us during our stay at her mansion. Those chocolates were yummy, I wanted to eat more. I did get bored eating seafood everyday but as long as it's with grandma, I'm fine with it.

For the first time, I cried in front of my classmate. Well, Eric may be my relative but I know him through a classmate relationship. Has Mia seen me cry before? I don't think so.

Alice called for the nurse and they covered grandma's body with a white cloth. That was the time, when the time we spent with grandma was officially over.

"Miss, shall we leave?" We went to the door while Eric stayed behind. "Young master, should I bring you home as well?"

"I will return on my own, thank you."

My tears had dried up when we left the hospital but my eyes were still red and swollen from crying. No one told me grandma's cough was a disease, and it's genetic at that. Sooner or later, mother will pass away from that disease too and so will Andrea.

Just thinking that made me tear up again. I will be left all alone with Alice, and when it's my turn, where will Alice go? Will she serve another house?

I was lost in thought for the whole journey until we reached home. Alice told my mother about it and she didn't seem surprised.

I went to my room and lay on my bed. I gave up on living my life when I knew I would die eventually anyway.

'How old was grandma? 73? 70?' Either way, I never expected grandma to leave so casually in front of my eyes. She sounded like she was going to take a nap.

Ding!

Who is so bold to text me when I'm not in a good mood?

I checked my phone and it was Eric. He said grandma's funeral will be taken in three days. Just when I was about to continue reading, my sister knocked on my room door.

"Amanda, mother is calling us."

We went to the living room and sat on the couch opposite our mother. I thought she would be talking about the funeral but turned out, she was talking about her lifespan.

"Your grandmother was able to live until 74 years old because she's living alone. Even the maids seldom go near her."

No wonder she has been managing everything by herself. But if that was the case, what about mother?

"I've tried living alone by sending both of you to her mansion, but it seems like I worsened her condition."

That was the reason she sent us there and told us to live on our own? But I was just fine in the dorm, why did she suddenly come over to take me home?

"Andrea, I leave Amanda in your hands. Take care of her until your maximum."

"I will, mother."

Hold on, why only her? Is it a disease that only the eldest child of the family has? Mother dismissed us without telling me anything about my life. Maybe she doesn't really care whether I live or not.

Dinner was ready just in time. We had a peaceful dinner, without my sister's teasing.

I placed my dishes in the sink and went to my room after I was done eating. I checked my phone and found 10 missed calls from Eric. I thought of calling back because it looked like an emergency but he called me first.

"What is it? I'm hanging up if it's just a goodnight call."

"Of course it is but I have something else to tell you so don't hang up first."

I stayed on the call to hear what he had to say. I was telling myself to hang up immediately if it was just unimportant things.

"Seems like our mothers will be next."

Next? Oh, did he mean their deaths? Just then, I suddenly had a thought.

"Does that mean, you will too?" He never talked about his family so I didn't know if he has siblings. But since Andrea was the only one affected by the disease, I assumed it was a disease that only affects the eldest child.

I could hear him giggling on the other side. Did I say something wrong?

"It's something only women get. Are you perhaps worried about me dying?" He was definitely grinning, I'm sure of it. "But, aren't you worried about yourself?"

Right… Mother didn't mention me so I totally forgot about myself being affected. The more I thought about it, the more I felt like it's not possible that only the eldest daughter gets it.

I spaced out while thinking and forgot I was on the line with Eric.

"Never mind, it's late now you should sleep. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." He ended the call and I changed into my pajamas. I braided my hair loosely before heading to bed so it wouldn't get too messy in the morning.

The next morning, I woke up later than usual because I had a dream about everyone leaving me alone. After I realized that was going to happen eventually, I started tearing up.

I went to the bathroom to wash my face before going to the dining room. Breakfast was already served and my sister had started eating, so did my mother.

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"I did, but, you were…..crying…"

I did? That makes sense since my eyes were so painful.

"It's… just a nightmare." I said and took my seat. "Good morning, mother."

I need to pull myself together! If I would be left alone soon, I should cherish every moment starting from now. Regretting afterwards won't do.

After breakfast, I went to the door to wait for Alice as usual. Sometimes I wonder when she will eat her breakfast when she's driving me and my sister to school every morning.

"Alice, I'm ready."

"One moment, Miss." She took the car keys on the top of the shelf and opened the door. I wore my shoes when suddenly, I remembered I left my phone in my room. I was too lazy to take it and I didn't want anyone touching it either, so I decided to just leave it. Going to school without a phone won't hurt.

I fastened my safety belt and Alice started the engine.

"Shall we leave, Miss? Make sure you have taken your necessities and fastened your safety belt."

"Yes."

She stepped on the accelerator and off we went, to Calnan Academy.