chaoswalker_7
Lv3
I'm not lazy, I have a full time job called living.
2023-01-18 đã tham giaGlobal
-d
Bài viết
13.3h
đang đọc
77
Đọc sách
Huy hiệu
6Khoảnh khắc
34
chaoswalker_71yrtrả lời Flattened_Rice_007He just turned, he's not used to it
The liquid itself was unmistakeably blood.- chaoswalker_71yrtrả lời Flattened_Rice_007
Couldn't have said it better myself
"IT WORKS!!! IT FREAKING WORKS!!! This is the best day of my life!" The figure screamed in joy with his voice sounding close to sobbing. "Seventy years of continuous failures but this result is well worth it. Let's see if I'm no longer worthy in the eyes of that old man. Denying me my birthright just cause I lost to my younger brother. With this, I can make an army strong enough to conquer the Darklands." - chaoswalker_71yrtrả lời Radpiplup
- chaoswalker_71yrtrả lời Radpiplup
- chaoswalker_71yrbình luận
You can use full stops in the middle of a paragraph too. using commas makes it seem like one long sentence
The hairs on her neck stood up and she swallowed hard, with the torchlight of her phone she tried to see what was there, but she was too scared to walk forward, Ana took a deep breath and gathered courage, she walked to the bush where she heard the sound and a creature jumped out of it, she screamed and started making a run for it, she was sweating madly and that's when she realized she had walked too far from home and was lost. - chaoswalker_71yrbình luận
Wow Greek, this is a nice start.
Ana was sitting in the balcony of my room, looking at the garden down below, recalling the saddest incidents of the previous year. Never in her 20 years of existence did she feel so pained. - chaoswalker_71yrtrả lời mahe_ale_aba
Thanks and I hope to improve even more
Milas hit the beast as hard as he could and leopard let out a cry like a kitten in pain. Milas hit over and over till the beast got off him and leapt a few meters away. The beast gazed at Milas with fury but its legs were trembling. It was trembling with fear and pain. It couldn't believe its prey would be this dangerous. - chaoswalker_71yrtrả lời chaoswalker_7Ch 7 CHAPTER 7 : BREAKFAST
- chaoswalker_71yrbình luậnCh 7 CHAPTER 7 : BREAKFAST
- chaoswalker_71yrbình luận
The first person POV might be affecting how you use " ".
Đoạn này đã bị xóa - chaoswalker_71yrbình luận
Try using **** or --------- to separate events.
Đoạn này đã bị xóa - chaoswalker_71yrbình luận
The line is fine without " "
Đoạn này đã bị xóa - chaoswalker_71yrbình luận
Use " " more often as it makes your sentences easier to understand.
Đoạn này đã bị xóa - chaoswalker_71yrtrả lời Flattened_Rice_007
Cool 👍. I can't update due to some personal reasons but hope you check out my next chapter too.
Đoạn này đã bị xóa - chaoswalker_71yrbình luận
This is a great cliffhanger, had me begging for more.
Đoạn này đã bị xóa