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Zieg's quest to punch Odin's face

After getting hit by a truck again, Zieg decides to keep his word to punch Odin in the face.

dervishscyth · Tranh châm biếm
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49 Chs

Joining the group for a bit

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure of this meeting?" I remained seated on the spot, a small smile on my lips as I eyed the group of 4.

"Hey there chief! Last time we met I was Madam Josephine Gribbles De Peeb, and you were... you!" Lohse broke the silence easily.

"Yes, I see you lot made it off the ship safely."

"Aye, it will take more than a couple of beardless bugs to take me down! Which reminds me, ye have my thanks, mate!" Beast clapped me on the back a few times.

"If you're quite finished, we can get back on track." Fane spoke with his arms crossed. The elf who I remembered was Sebille, stood to the side without saying anything.

"Right, were here because we heard you could do something about these." Lohse held up a broken collar. Oh, they already had one of their collars removed.

"Oh?" I turned my gaze towards Fane who was currently hooded and wearing clothing to hide his bony features.

"Yes, I recall you saying you were going to figure out how to free yourself from these blasted things." Fane stated as I did tell him that. "But judging on how you still have one yourself, perhaps I thought too highly of you."

I snorted, letting the projection of the collar fade away for a moment."No perhaps you thought a little too lowly, I'd say." I smirked.

"Yes, well what will it take to procure your services."

"Hmm." I took a moment to think. It really isn't that difficult to do it. "It's not really that difficult to do, but the Magisters will definitely take issue if you didn't have it on."

"That's of no concern, we were planning to make our way into their compound to begin with."

"Oh? Pretty bold." I hummed in thought, there were more than one way through.

"Aye, apparently bonesy over here thinks that they've got his trinket or some such."

"It's not a trinket... well I suppose it's essentially a toy, but it is a toy of utmost importance to me if we are to escape."

"Alright then, I'm looking for spellbooks to collect. I've bought some from a few people in the camp, but it was mostly basic tomes." I offered.

"You won't find much better on this island." Sebille who had been silent until now spoke up.

"Oh?"

"What do you expect at a place like this?"

She had a point.

"She's got a point there. Hey! Why don't you join us? I'm sure you can find what you're looking for on the mainland." Lohse chimed in. The group waited as I considered their offer.

It's true that I wouldn't want to stay in this world long. I already got something decent, everything else was pretty much secondary or for fun. However I don't much like a world this far back in technological advances. A lot of things, including myself stink. There's no T.V. or any other amenities. But my greed for more books to add to my collection was strong.

'Dragons are greedy after all'

'He's right, greed is par for the course.'

'Shush you two! I am human!' I shushed the two voices in my head before coming to a decision.

"Very well, you've convinced me." I nodded in agreement. The sooner I got off this island, the sooner I could get more books. Which meant the sooner that I could leave this reality.

"I am Zieg Aversis. My speciality is summoning to have things kill for me. I can fight on the front lines myself, but I'd rather not, as it would be bad for everyone if I did." I stood up with an introduction.

"You sure it's not because you're a pansy?" Beast asked stroking his beard.

"No, I just have a problem where I sort of lose control of myself in battle." I waved away that line of thought.

"Hah! Like you lose control of your breeches?" the dwarf roared in laughter

"Oh, that happens to me sometimes too! Well, I can't exactly control it. It just kind of happens." The red head sheepishly chimes in.

"Right, well let's be on our way then."

We had just walked through the front gate after killing the 5 magisters guarding the entrance. I stayed at the back of the group as I was a summoner.

"Hmm?" I turned my head to a humanoid figure in red robes. It stared at us and leaned side to side, like a puppet without strings.

"If this is anyone's idea of a sick joke, then I'd rather not stick around for the punchline." Beast mumbled from the front.

"It's an abomination, is what it is. I can't stop staring at it." Lohse practically wretched

"I sense we are getting closer." Fane hummed, not that put off by it.

It looked like it was once a Sourcerer, except now it was just a mindless puppet. Can barely call it a living being, more like a flesh puppet awaiting orders.

"At least they don't seem too keen on making things difficult for us." Sebille said, waving a hand in front of one of them.

"Yes well, let's not wait to find out if that will remain the same." I took one last glance at them before moving. These kinds of things weren't that new to me. Granted I wouldn't do it myself.

We passed by another one who looked like it was once a dwarf. It's eyes and mouths were sewn shut. "Mmph. pf-pf-pf" It looked like it was trying to say something but failed.

'Disgusting...'

'It'd be a mercy to put it out of it's misery...'

I ignored the voices in my head as we continued onwards. More and more of these abominations were seen just standing around, of various races.

Eventually we reached a main hall, blood was splattered on quite a few parts of the floor.

"Mmmm, who are you, you lovely little puppy?" A man appeared out of nowhere in front of Lohse. Did he just use a short ranged teleport with nearly no delay!? My eyes were able to see it all, dear lord I need time to process this!

To most of our surprises, he reached out and tugged her cheek.

"So soft. So sweet." He shuddered as his voice sounded like he was having an orgasm just from that.

"Have you seen these contraptions? This must be the 'Magister freak' the blacksmith was referring to. He may have the very tools I need to craft my mask." Fane said as we were all more than happy to let him deal with this guy.

Lohse quickly backed up as she was clearly creeped out, Sebille kept her needle gripped tightly, and Beast's expression was scrunched up at the room around us. I remained there, internally processing the form of teleportation that he used.

"I require a contraption that can rip off a person's face in order to wear as my own." Fane cheerfully explained, he even demonstrated the idea by reaching over and tugging on the Magister's cheeks.

"I might have just the thing!" The obviously insane Magister responded excitedly. "But having and giving are two different things. How about a trade?"

"What do you want for it then?" Fane asked to which the man grinned widely.

"Well, sugar.... now that you should mention it." He inhaled deeply "I do... I do smell something quite... delicious on you. Almost smells like a Magister I once knew. One I could never convince to visit me here.... Atusa by name." He continued inhaling the air as if entranced by the scent.

Fane looked over towards Sebille who slowly removed a severed leg from her bag and tossed it over. I was honestly confused on why she had a severed leg on her, but then I remembered elves being able to get memories through feasting on flesh.

"Bless you, poppet. Oh, bless you. And here's the toy you wanted!" he handed over the face-ripper.

Fane was clearly.... not necessarily happy, but certainly content. He gave us a curt nod and stowed the contraption in his bag.

"...Do you guys mind if we kill him anyway?" I asked, honestly while I was no stranger to gruesome experimentation. This guy just seemed like the type of guy I'd want dead.

"I wouldn't say no to it." Beast responded

"Same." Lohse had no problem killing the creep.

"Agreed." Sebille probably just wanted to kill him regardless.

"I already got what I want."

"Excellent, then he dies." I snapped a finger as a Nightmaiden and Swordtress appeared by my side. "I'm going to enjoy this more than I should."

We proceeded to destroy all the abominations in the room, along with the Magister. When Fane tried to take his face, we stopped him because none of us wanted to see his face anymore than we needed to.

After escaping Fort Joy and making out into the Hollowed Marshes. We ended up meeting up with a group who called themselves Seekers. After healing some of the wounded, we were tasked with finding someone named Gareth if we wanted help against Bishop Alexander who would stop us from leaving the island.

Eventually we arrived at a coast, where a woman in rags stood. As we approached, Fane gasped.

"It's her! The wrinkled human that stole my mask. Please, I must speak with her."

"I remember her too, she was the reason our ship sunk." I remembered the power she wielded. It was impressive. It seemed everyone else was surprised, as they didn't know who was responsible.

"Go ahead, but were definitely killing her right?" I raised a brow at Fane.

"Aye, I've a bone to pick with her too, now." Beast cracked his knuckles.

"She'll get what's coming to her." Sebille brought out her needle.

"Just give me a moment." He sighed, making his way towards the witch.

I noticed her tracing glyphs in the air, I expected some kind of fire or lightning to come shooting out. But to my surprise they sputtered forth in black smoke. I was confused, as she wasn't incompetent from my memory.

She cried to the skies in frustration, in her recognizable thin rasp. "My lord! I've loved you. I've obeyed you. What's my sin? How long must I suffer?!" She was obviously dismayed

She sees Fane approach and punches her fist in his direction. Her face flushed red with rage. Her eyes flared with recognition.

"Who are you! No... What are you!? No one should be able to craft anything like that mask!" She nearly screeched at him.

"What about you? Who are you and who is this lord of yours?" He danced around her question with his own. She didn't seem too eager to answer either.

The witch opens her mouth to speak, but something happens. Her face droops and her eyes turn black. "Fane, the traitor shall be destroyed." A deep voice came out of her as she was possessed.

Her eyes cleared and she turned to the heavens once more. "I offer this sacrifice to you, return me by your side. Make me whole!"

A boulder appeared in front of her from nowhere. And to my surprise it was launched at us in the back.

"Cheap!" I grunted as a glyph appeared in front of us. The large rock exploded into a shower of black oil. Before anyone had time to react, an oversized fireball slammed into the glyph. Causing an explosion, big enough to destroy it and send a few of us flying back.

"I've a bone to pick with you, ya old hag!" Beast roared, charging towards the witch.

Sebille appeared behind her needle raised, sending it towards her neck. However the witch disappeared. Are all competent mages here capable of short range teleportation!?

She appeared by fane, grasping him by the face as her hands erupted in fire. To her surprised, Fane disappeared from her grip in a starry flash.

A group of mausoleum soldiers rushed at her, then a concentrated blast of heat pierced right through them. Heading right for Lohse and I.

A stream of lightning left Lohse's hand, meeting to laser head on. An ensuing explosion destroyed a portion of the field along with the rest of the soldiers.

Eventually we did manage to kill her, as she was outnumbered and clearly not in the best shape.

I spent the the rest of the journey recalibrating my own brand of teleportation. I had a lot of references now, I just needed to digest this new knowledge before applying it.