Chapter Three

For the next few months, Nathan existed as nothing more than a walking corpse, someone who had wreaked and destroyed lives, he was sure, and yet he was unscathed, untouched by law or any other consequences, save for the damage to his own body, his own wounds being the only proof of his hidden sins.

Mark and Chantel came to visit him, and he could barely look them in the eye. He felt so much guilt about how he had treated them that night, and yet when he tried to apologize to them, they brushed it off and told him that it was fine, but the truth was that for him, it wasn't fine.

There was this eerie feeling in the back of his head that was telling him that he was the one that was responsible for causing the pain and heartache of so many people and that he should have paid for it, but it seemed as though the only thing everyone seemed to want to do was brush over the fact and pretend as though it hadn't happened. He didn't want to face the consequences.

And that was why he rejected the medications. His hand had been shattered in the accident, and he was told that he would require large amounts of therapy in order to get it back working and completely functional again. They had advised him to take some medicine to numb the pain, but he didn't want to numb the pain. In his own twisted mind, he had managed to convince himself that the pain was exactly what he deserved and that if he were to experience that pain, then it would allow him to come one step closer to feeling like a less terrible person.

He then soon came to realize that doing that only left him even more bitter and angry. He wanted to tell the world what he had done or at least meet the family he had hurt and try to apologize to them, but he was scared of what they would think.

He didn't even know or understand why his family and friends still tolerated him, and Chantel, even after how terribly he had been acting, still stayed. She went to the doctors' appointments, and she helped with the physical therapy. It took him almost five months to be able to hold a pen and a while longer before he regained function in them, and even then she stayed. He wanted to know why she was still there, but she had always told him that she would always be there for him.

He sighed at the thought and was even more shocked when Mark was still around. They were his only true friends, and although he was beyond grateful that they still managed to stay and put up with all of his faults, he didn't want to continue to feel like a burden to anyone.

He knew that he had to break up with her; he was tired of feeling as though she was his nanny and had to stick around to be with him. He knew that she had a pure heart and that she didn't genuinely care for him, and that was one of the main reasons that he knew that she had to let her go. He couldn't continue to drag her down into all of his drama. He knew that she didn't deserve any of that.

He didn't think that she would be free to leave willingly, and so he had done the one thing that he had thought that he never would. It was our first social function together after the accident, and he had been planning on finishing college online. His dad had given him an internship, and he had invited him to one of his infamous business parties. He had invited Chantel and Mark to come along, and she seemed genuinely happy, which only made him feel like a bad person. He had been drinking heavily through the night, and he knew that at the end, his dad had wanted him to give a search because he had considered his recovery to be inspirational and he wanted everyone to learn more from it.

But the search that he had intended to give was one that was very different. instead of talking about his recovery and about his relationship. He said to them everything that had been going wrong with it. He had felt as though he was a burden to his girlfriend and his friends, and as though it was the very top of the cake, he had pointed towards Chantel and Aidan. It was almost as though his mouth no longer had a filter. He was almost incapable of reading the room, and he didn't seem to get the hint that there was so much that was wrong that was going on with him.

He had to be dragged off the stage, as he seemed to be unable to get the right answer from the people. The room had fallen into silence after the scene that he had caused. They didn't seem to know how to answer him or what to say to him in response to his words.

His dad had been absolutely furious with him, and his mother had simply looked disappointed. The truth was that he was disappointed with himself as well, but there wasn't much that he could do about it.

He had made his way off the stage, and he immediately found her standing at the edge of the stage, waiting for him. She looked absolutely furious to see him standing there. She had pulled him outside, wanting to talk to him, and he had refused to give her a single moment in order to talk to him properly. He had laughed her off when she threatened to leave him because the truth was that he didn't take her seriously. He had thought that because she had been there for him through the worst part of it, she would continue to be there for him throughout the test of it, but the truth was that he was terribly wrong. Because the truth was that everyone had their breaking point and their limits, and he had just reached hers.

He knew that she was going to be a problem with it, and she had told him that she couldn't do it anymore. She couldn't stand there, and she watched as he ruined everything for them. She had been seeing him like a parasite that she had to win, and she was tired of being like an artwork that she had to work on. He understood fully where she was coming from, but he had never wanted to be that burden of a person to anyone, and he had never been asked to atone for that burden, so when she said that she had wanted to leave, he didn't stop her.

He had to let her go, and soon after, Alex came along with her as well. He knew that he was the only true friend that he had left, and yet he had pushed him away even though all the others had left him a long time ago. He sighed at the very thought of what was going on, and he couldn't believe that it was going the way that it had.

He had let out a sigh at the very thought of it, but he had still made no attempt to stop them. They were better off without him, and he knew for a fact that everyone was actually better off without him. He knew that it hurt a lot, but there wasn't much that he could do about it. They were the best thing that had happened to me, but he had ruined that.

*******

Nathan sighed as he twisted and turned in his bed. He slowly peeled his eyes open as he ran a hand over his face. It had been exactly three years since Nathan's life was turned upside down, and now his life simply seemed to blend into a large gray blob. He didn't know what he was living for anymore, as he didn't have the motivation to do anything anymore. He had graduated a while ago, and although it would have been seen as a happy and memorable moment for many people, for him, he felt numb and didn't feel anything at all.

He sighed as he slowly stood up from his bed. His gaze drifted toward his right arm. It had healed up weirdly, but when he looked closely, he could still see the surgical scars that lined his skin like a tattoo. He involuntarily closed his eyes; he could almost feel himself drifting back towards the accident, but he quickly pulled himself out of it as he shook his head profusely from side to side.

It wasn't time for him to think about things like that. He was, in fact, determined to have a good day today. He wouldn't allow his thoughts to drift toward all the negative things that were going on in his life. Instead, he planned on having a good day, and he would get one no matter how long it would take.

He made his way over to his bathroom and started getting ready. He hummed as he allowed the hot water to run down his skin. It helped to remind him that he was human after all, and he sighed at the feeling of having it against his skin. Once he was done in the shower, he slowly made his way back outside before slipping into his pristine suit. He was in the second week of the internship after all. His dad had said that it was his time to redeem himself after the stunt that he had pulled the other time. He had to prove to the people that he was still good enough to do the job that needed to be done.

He made his way down the stairs, and he heard the sound of his parents talking amongst themselves in the dining room. He was curious, but he brushed it off as he quickly made his way inside. He wasn't surprised that his mom was talking to Chef Jackson and his dad was talking animatedly into the phone.

Nathan cleared his throat to get his parent's attention, and they brushed him off before pointing towards the seat that was on the table and ushering me to sit down. He sighed before he made himself comfortable in the seat. "Good morning, he said, speaking up, and they only gave him a nod of their heads in response. He didn't know what he had been expecting, but he let out a sigh to cover up his initial disappointment.

He ignored them as he began to dig into his plate of pancakes that were positioned in front of him. He heard as they began to talk. between themselves, and he was relieved that they didn't have their attention focused on him anymore.

"So, have you got the files ready for the meeting today?" His dad spoke up, and he rolled his eyes with a sigh before saying, "Yes, Father, for the fifth time, they are ready for the meeting, and before you say anything else, I am not planning on embarrassing you," he said, knowing that those were the next words that were bound to leave his mouth.

"Hey, I'm just saying that a repeat of the previous occasion is unnecessary." His father spoke in a whisper. Nathan ignored him after that, and he reached for his knife to cut into his pancakes. He cursed when he felt the muscles in his hand begin to tense. He watched as his hand began to shake, and he tensed, pulled it into a fist, and moved it away. He hoped that his dad wouldn't notice, but his mom did.

"Are you okay, Nathan?" she asked. He almost laughed at her words. It was the same question that she deemed necessary to ask him every other day. He would always give her the same answer in response, and it seemed to work for her.

"I am fine, mother," he said to her blankly. That seemed to do the trick for her, as she nodded her head at him. "I hope you have a plan for your therapy session this month. He will try to come to the house," she said, and he wanted to open his mouth to reiterate her words, but she gave him a pointed glare in response. He knew that meant that there was no room for him to argue with her. He only nodded his head at her as he tried to turn his attention back towards the food that was in front of him.

The room was soon blanketed in silence, and he watched as his dad stood up to leave. He waited for his driver, Martin, to arrive before he got the chance to leave. He still wasn't clear enough to drive, so he needed to make use of a chauffeur. He hated that fact, but he knew that was the only way that his mother would allow him to ever go anywhere. It was what she called a compromise, and he knew that there was nothing that he could do about the situation.

He was relieved when he heard the honk of a car door, and he knew that he had arrived. He smiled as he reached out to grab a hold of his briefcase. He placed a kiss on his mom's forehead before he began heading towards the door for him to leave. He sighed as he slipped his body into the back seat of the car. He allowed himself to get comfortable as he allowed his driver, Martin, to begin driving off towards Maxwell Corp. They didn't talk much to each other, but he always liked that much better. He was not a talkative person anyway.

He was relieved when they finally pulled up in front of the company, and he grinned before making his way inside. He knew that there were set to be several eyes who would be trained on me, but he had already gotten used to that. He sighed in relief when he managed to make his way into the meeting room in time. His father often made a spectacle of him when he was late, and he didn't need that to happen to him right now.

He made his way to the back of the room, where he had been appointed secretary. He didn't have a fun time learning how to write again, and although he was very slow right now, he was finally getting back into the hang of it.

He was able to write across the sheet without wobbling, and although he was still learning, he had to admit that it was still slightly impressive. He took down notes from the meeting as he heard his dad listen to the opinions of the workers. He tried his best not to zone out after. but he was relieved when the meeting was over and it was finally able to come to an end.

He sighed when everyone closed up from the meeting room, and his dad excused everyone. He told him to meet him in his office after so that we could talk about the meeting and what to do with the information that we had gathered from the meeting. He made his way over to his office and he started to gather notes to make the minutes of the meeting.

He found that typing was much easier than writing, and he was relieved that he had the opportunity to do that now. He let out a sigh as he got to work. He was pulled out of his thoughts several hours later when he heard the sound of someone knocking their palm against his door. He and asked them to come in, and he watched as his assistant made her way into the room on shaky feet. "Sir, you have a visitor," she spoke, and he nodded his head at her as he asked her to tell the person to come in. and when the person did step into the room, he felt his breath hitch in his throat. It was the last person that he had expected and someone that he hadn't seen in far too long.

"Chantel... and Mark," he spoke, and he choked out the words. They seemed to give him an awkward smile as they walked into the room. He stared at Chantel as though he were in a trance. She was wearing a summer dress, and he had to admit that she looked absolutely gorgeous. She was still the first woman that he had ever loved, and although they hadn't stayed in love and he had messed everything up, she was still the most important person in his life.

The sound of someone clearing their throat at him jolted him out of his thoughts. He cleared his throat as he was able to snap out of his thoughts. "Well, how can I help you? Sit down, please," he said to them, and he watched as Chantel gave him an apologetic smile as Mark scratched the back of his throat.

They came to sit down on the seats, and we were filled with an awkward silence. Nathan's eyes drifted toward Chantel, and he felt his throat dry up at the sight, he tried not to be bothered by the sight of the giant engagement ring that was on her finger.

Aidan's eyes drifted towards Nathan, and he watched as he took hold of her hand in his and squeezed it lightly. That was all the information that he needed.

"Congratulations." Nathan managed to choke out. He knew that he had no one to blame for the situation but himself. He was the one who had pushed them away, and yet that didn't stop the angst or the pain.

"Thank you. I see that you are doing much better now. Who would have thought that you would fall into the corporate setting? looking like the right secretary." Aidan said, and he knew that it was meant to be nothing, but he couldn't help but laugh lightly.

"Yes, thank you, and I heard that you are moving up in your dad's company as well. I am happy for you. That is great." Nathan said to him, and although he didn't feel great about it, he didn't want to show them how much it hurt.

They sat in an awkward silence once more until it was broken when he heard Chantel's throat. He watched as he placed a small card on the table and looked at him with a small smile. "It's the invitation to the wedding. It's in Switzerland. We wanted a winter wonderland theme, and of course, we had to invite you." She spoke as though it were the most normal thing to invite your ex to your wedding.

Nathan took a moment to swallow the lump in his throat before he took the card into his shaky hand. He held back the feeling of being ripped open that flooded his chest as he stared at him with a small smile. "Well, once again, congratulations. I am happy for both of you, and I will be there," he said to them, and they both smiled before they left, but no one was fooled. He could see the nostalgia in their eyes, and he was sure they could see the pain in his. He didn't want to see them get happily ever after, but he knew that he owed it to them to be there. Maybe he would finally get the closure that he needed once and for all.

It was going to be a vacation, to be remembered for sure.