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Whispers of Despair

Furuya Satoru's wish for a smooth start at Seido came to a jarring halt after an unprecedented discovery: he was two months pregnant. Foggy memories from a night of partying and unwanted advances resurface, and as Furuya begins to piece everything together, he realizes that his several-month journey is going to be nothing but a cesspool of doubt, hatred, tears, and despair.

redpenkiller · Tranh châm biếm
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52 Chs

Kazuya and Kasumi: Wishful Thinking

The Same Day - 3:15 PM - Yeast Infection

"Your total is $14.87. Will that be cash or card?"

"C-C-C-C-Card! Here you go!"

Brows raised, Miyuki takes the card from the flustered customer in front of him. She's covering her mouth with her hands, muttering to her friend about how attractive he is and why she hasn't seen him the other times she's visited the bakery.

"Looks like you're drawing up quite the crowd, Kazuya-kun," Kasumi says.

There's a line that's leading out the door, formulated of mostly high-school-aged girls and some boys that decided this was their time to shine.

"We're normally busy, but your stunning visage is bringing in all these people! I'm really starting to like you now."

Miyuki grins triumphantly as he calls for the next customer and takes their order. He grabs a slice of strawberry cheesecake from inside the display counter and packs it into a pink box with a satin bow on top. After giving the customer their change, they sneak a slip of paper into his hand and scamper away, giggling.

Miyuki opens his palm, "She gave me her number," he says, pocketing the paper, "That's the eighth one today."

Kasumi laughs, "You'll get used to it. I have regulars who just won't stop chatting me up. They invite me to dinner, saying that they'll cheat on their wives with me, like, ugh, I don't want sloppy seconds. Yeah, I entertain their antics and shove my tits in their faces, but it's all business. Keeping them on their toes and reeling them in means more money for me. Isn't that right, honey?"

Her repeat customer holds up his hands in defeat, a slight smile on his face, "You're a tough nut to crack, Sumi-chan. I've been coming here for years and you still won't give me a chance."

"Can't you see this ring on my finger, stupid? I'm happily married."

"You're vicious." He points a warning finger at Miyuki, "Listen, kid. Please don't fall for people like her. They'll just break your heart and steal your money with great food."

"Nah, I'm pretty sure I'll be okay," Miyuki says.

The man leaves and the duo takes turns serving, baking, wiping down tables, and switching the music selection for the next three hours until Kasumi opts to send Miyuki home.

"Really?" he questions as he cleans his hands with a towel, "I'm not tired in the slightest. I can keep going."

Kasumi speaks while carrying a tray of desserts and drinks to a seated couple, "It's okay. You did a splendid job, so I'm letting you off early. Also…I don't want Ruru to get lonely. I'll call you a cab."

Miyuki doesn't protest—who knows what Furuya was doing in his unfairly vast house all by himself?

He enters the kitchen, sets his apron on a hook, and dons his sweater. He comes back out and Kasumi kisses his cheek, saying that she'll see him later. She gives him a box of lemon tart slices to share with her son.

Minutes later, Miyuki disappears into the cab and Kasumi resumes working, humming to the song that's playing over the speakers.

--

6:40 PM

"Cool," Furuya states.

He folds another slice of pizza in half and eats it.

"Cool?" Miyuki parrots, eying how there were already four slices missing from the eight-slice pie, "I inform you about my day and the most you can say is 'cool'?"

"What more do you want me to say? You're having a wonderful time with my mother; that has nothing to do with me."

"What's with the attitu—oh." Miyuki interrupts himself after piecing together the evidence laid right before him.

The excessive eating, the frigid tone of voice, and the way Furuya avoided his gaze. Now that he thought about it, Furuya was always distant and a master at being indifferent to most things, but they were bonding. They were slowly, but surely, making headway through their daily experiences and discussions.

Hence, there was only one reason for the younger teen's sudden decline.

"Quit acting jealous, you brat," Miyuki snipes.

It's a tease and it works.

Furuya pauses mid-bite and stares. He opens his mouth to speak but revises what he's going to say.

"Is it irrational for me to be jealous?"

"When it pertains to your mom, definitely. She's the total opposite of you and it's so intriguing to be in her presence. Don't worry, I'm not trying to emulate one of those weird porno scenarios…unless I happen to catch her stuck in a washing mach—"

"You're not eating any food and you're sleeping in one of the guest rooms tonight. Starve and be alone."

Furuya carries the pizza box as he marches to his room.

Miyuki runs after him and tries the knob, but it's already locked, "I was joking," he explains, "I wouldn't actually do that to you because firstly, that's weird, and secondly, you're too territorial for me to even bother."

Silence.

Miyuki knocks on the door and tries the knob again, "Hey, don't be like this. You promised that we'd sleep in the same room tonight."

"Under the pretense that you wouldn't provoke me again."

"Which is why I said I was kidding. Tomorrow, we can spend the entire day together, if you want. You can have my undivided attention."

There's some shuffling, and Furuya eventually opens the door by a fraction. He offers a pizza slice between the space, "I was joking too. Pepperoni?"

Miyuki accepts it with a relieved sigh, "Your jokes lack flavor. I couldn't tell if you were being serious or not."

"Blame it on the hormones."

--

They order another pizza, which Miyuki begrudgingly pays for, and pair it with a bottle of soda they steal from Kasumi's mini-fridge in her room. They weren't going to be playing baseball anytime soon, so they used that as an excuse to spoil their diets. Steamy and stringy cheese guiltily settle in their stomachs as a drama plays on Furuya's TV.

"I didn't know you were interested in these shows," Miyuki says, his eyes peeled to the screen as he pours himself another glass of soda, "You don't seem like the type."

"I'm not some one-trick pony who's only obsessed with baseball," says Furuya, "When I'm home, I have an almost religious bond with soap operas. I live vicariously through the characters because my own life is uneventful. It excites me. If I'm not excited, I get bored."

The grim shift in Furuya's tone makes Miyuki turn to face him, "And what happens when you get bored?"

"I—"

CRASH!

They both flinch in their seats, startled by the character that just mysteriously fell from the roof of a building onto a car. The protagonist who was watching from a street away breaks into hysterics, dropping to her knees.

Miyuki facepalms, "How did no one see that coming?! Why does the whistleblower always meet up with someone who's associated with the villain, knowing that they're gonna get killed? Now he's dead!"

"What a shame," Furuya says as the next episode airs, "I don't live vicariously through him."

--

The Next Day - Saturday - 1:05 AM

"Hey, you're still awake?" Kasumi asks, "I thought you would be fast asleep by now."

She's sitting at the dinner table, the glare of her laptop being the only source of light. Documents and spreadsheets are scattered across the table, a half-empty mug of coffee occupying the least amount of space.

Miyuki enters. He grabs a cup and fills it with water, responding after he gulps it down, "The sound of the front door opening woke me up"—a lie—"and I was thirsty. Did you just arrive?"

"Yeah. I tend to stay late at the bakery because I have nothing better to do. My husband calls me every night and practically forces me to go home. He knows me so well."

"How long have you been together, if you don't mind me asking?"

Kasumi lifts her round glasses atop her head and takes a sip of her coffee. The memories are like sugar, sweetening the taste of caffeine filling her mouth.

"We married right after Ruru was born," she says, her voice laden with fondness, "I don't know whether you've noticed or if you were too polite to ask, but I'm young. I turned thirty a couple of weeks ago. I didn't expect to get pregnant so early in life, but…shit happens. Haha. Anything else you want to know?"

Miyuki is now brimming with curiosity. It was no wonder he initially assumed Furuya's mother was his sister—not only was the resemblance uncanny, but she indeed looked very youthful. She was a teen mom as well, which brings him to his flurry of burning questions.

"How did it feel being a young mother? Were you scared? Do you regret it? Was it hard? How did your family react?"

Kasumi lets the inquiries hang in the air as she treks deeper into her memory, uncovering moments that have been untouched for years. Confident with what she's remembered, she gestures for Miyuki to sit on the chair next to her.

"When I discovered I was pregnant," she starts, "I was terrified, but I didn't necessarily feel like it was an inconvenience. I trusted Shinichiro, my husband, to stay with me and that was all I needed. My parents obviously weren't too happy about it and it took an absurd amount of convincing to let me keep Ruru.

"I could've…aborted him, but I thought it would be cowardly to choose that option. A-At least for me, personally! Everyone's circumstances are different. I needed to prove that I was capable of becoming a responsible mother. Now, here I am, making great money with a great family. Ruru is my everything, Kazuya-kun. I don't regret having him at all."

Miyuki has one last question and it slides off his tongue like butter, "Do you think you're a good mother?"

There's a subtle change in Kasumi's demeanor, like she's crossed paths with a dangerous animal on her trip down memory lane. She plays with her fingers, something Furuya does when he's nervous.

"If Satoru were to search up the definition of unconditional love in a dictionary, there would be a picture of me next to it. Throughout his life, I've given him nothing but the purest form of love. I thought it was sufficient, but it wasn't enough to protect him. In middle school, he went through a phase because I lacked the ability to guide him.

"I was still naive and allowed him to roam free because I trusted him. What he did was natural human behavior, but I never thought he would let it spiral out of control. In essence, that was the origin story of why he attends Seido. He wanted a fresh start far from Hokkaido, claiming that he'd change. I guess he has, seeing how he's met someone incredible like you."

Something sinks inside Miyuki. Kasumi hadn't the slightest clue about his and Furuya's situation, and telling her would prove to be a challenge. In record time, they've established trust and a tight bond, and his fear of disappointing her was slowly setting in.

Disappointing adults—why was he exceptional at that?

"Judging by how ambiguous you're being," he says, resuming the conversation, "is it something Furuya has to tell me himself?"

"You catch on quick, Kazuya-kun. That's if he lets you in, of course. I know you know how reserved Ruru is. He would kill me for even telling you this much, so let's end right here before he conveniently wakes up or something."

With a laugh, Kasumi goes to refill her cup of coffee, and Miyuki's eyes wander to the sheets of paperwork on the table. He reads one of them.

"New recipe ideas?"

"Yup. We release a special product every month for a limited time, but I can't think of anything that screams special, you know? It's due in two days…"

Kasumi employs her signature and superbly effective puppy eyes, and Miyuki already knows his next mission.

"I'll use my outstanding brain-power to conjure up a product," he says, standing, 'It's the least I can do before I end up disappointing her.'

"You're freaking awesome, sweetie," Kasumi hugs him warmly and ruffles his hair, "Goodnight. I still have work to do, so I'll stay here."

Miyuki nods and heads back upstairs to Furuya's room. He quietly sits on the bed, resting his back against the headboard.

He looks at Furuya sleeping underneath the covers peacefully, in a stunning home, without the fear of being terrorized by a negligent mother or an eccentric father.

Or nightmares.

Miyuki could only fucking wish.

'How did this frigid, unsociable, selfish baseball maniac get blessed with such fortunate circumstances?' he thinks, holding his head in his hands, 'A maternal figure like Kasumi-san was all I wanted when I was younger. She's filling a void inside me that's been festering for over a decade.'

Miyuki then focuses his gaze on the rays of moonlight that shine through the curtains, the corners of his lips curling into a faint smile.

'For once, it's not that I can't sleep, but that I don't want to sleep. I'll spend the rest of the night thinking about how life would've been with a mother that loved me.'