I SUCK YOUR MIND, YOU BLOW MY HEAD

I woke up remarkably early in the morning judging by the weak light which it came through the curtains. I felt just a weak headache but not a trace of those huge hangovers which the alcohol provide.

I remembered perfectly what happened last night. Each frame of my silly action snorting over that strange man hand. I didn't want to but Freddie had pushed me to it naturally. I trusted him when he said to me the night would change. Indeed, it changed.

It changed from being a painful task to a red carpet before my feet to step on it elegantly. There was not an ounce of insecurity anymore, in none of my movements and words. I seemed to be the owner of each situation. I danced so long in each club we went. Till I fell exhausted. I didn't need the alcohol. Just let the music getting through me and guiding me.

I trudged out of bed, almost falling to the floor, bending my body in such an impossible stretching with a yawn which threatened to dislocate my jaw. I was totally naked, of course. Mr. Mercury laid face down, as usual. His perky left buttock stood out the sheet. I kissed it and got up.

Yes, last night we had sex. My restlessness disappeared when I saw the used prophylactic thrown by the bed, indolent. I touched my chest breathing, relieved. Thank goodness.

I threw it to the toilet bin and grabbed my phone to write my daily report. I had just a very light trace of guilty but had been such a pleasant awakening after the excessive night that I felt grateful. I had a real good time and that's not a sin, that I know of. I had just a few inches away the most fascinating man in the universe just for me. The only negative part is I was so hungry that I would eat the toothpaste. Everything else was perfect. Or at least my mind wanted to picture this situation that way.

- What are you doing?

Freddie's presence stark naked at the bathroom door while he scratched delicately his crotch, deserved a filming and afterwards an uploading in YouTube. I startled. He caught me with my phone in hand. How could I be so careless to not close the door at least?

- God, Freddie. You are a damn cat. Are you tiptoeing?

You are a kitten with a beautiful dick, for sure.

- What are you doing? -he asked again.

- Nothing.

- What is that thing that you hold in your hand?

Fuck, fuck, fuuuuuuck.

- This? Nothing, it's a... I just don't know. I found it last night at the last club we went.

Ash, for your better be a efficient machine of lies and so the leader of Queen could regard this incident just trivial.

- Let's look, show me.

- Freddie, it's like a light brick. I think it's nothing.

- Something has to be, darling. You were grabbing it like your life depended on it.

- I was just taking a look. I will throw it away.

- Give it to me -he demanded this time his face serious.

I wanted to kill Freddie Mercury and his damn morbid curiosity. Then I would kill myself for being such a stupid. With enough neurones I had time to switch it off.

- What kind of knobs are these? Let's see...

What a fucking genious he was, I thought to myself. Being switched off he could press whatever he liked, it would happen anything. But these restless persian fingers were capable of everything and he didn't stop till he switched it on. His huge eyes were wider when he saw in my mobile screen phone a Huaweii icon. We were in 1974 and this was Blade Runner, at the very least, to him.

- What the hell is this? It needs a password.

- Well I'm afraid we don't know it. Give it to me. Let's forget about this weird junk and explain to me what you did to me last night.

I pulled his narrow hips to me and placed my hands on his beautiful ass after leaving my heart and Fooling's at a safe place.

- Don't you remember? -he asked me smiling naughty.

- No and that pisses me off, you have no idea.

- I just can tell you that you were very receptive to all that I came up with.

- Was I? Didn't I come up anything?

- Each time you come up with more things and you are killing me, darling -he said pursing his lips to give one of his kisses but I stopped him with two fingers on them. He bit them playful.

- You are killing me too, I'm starving. You should show consideration with the people who use to eat.

- My greedy girl. What do you want for breakfast? I'm bringing you.

- Don't you want eat breakfast? You didn't eat anything since so long either.

- That's not correct.

- What did you eat apart from a quarter of a liquorice?

- Hmmm, let me think -he lifted up his beautiful eyes to the ceiling and fixed them again on me, mocking-. Another liquorice, yeah.

I puffed laughing and suddenly my smile freezed.

- A very powerful man's liquorice in the private room of the last club.

At this very instant I felt all my body trembled with outrage. Outrage against myself, of course. The night had been so long and I had a real good time that I didn't even take care of him as I should. Goddamit a thousand times.

- Eli, you look pale. What's wrong?

- Did you really do it?

- It was a fucking joke. Yesterday I felt myself very straight. I used even a condom with you like a good boy.

- I saw it.

- Darling, stop trembling.

I nodded not far off tears. I was so extremely emotional that I just thought. Another evident symptom of pregnancy. It couldn't be, it took me so long to control my emotions. I must learning not to be so transparent if I didn't want to throw it all away. I kissed several times his lips in a clear reaction of "thank you very much for not being out of control, Mr. Mercury". I noticed Freddie followed me confused with the flood of devoted kisses.

- Are you ok? -he said between the fourth and fifth.

- Bring me that breakfast, please. Before I faint.

😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧

I didn't get my period yet. I've snorted cocaine for the first time and Freddie caught me with my phone. I got a lot of things to tell Fooling and the morning was only beginning. I sweared myself not hiding him information again, no matter how burdensome could be. I used my phone when Freddie was out searching my sustenance.

Fooling thought the phone incident was just a slip with no repercussions as long as I could distract his attention to something else. Luckily Freddie wasn't attracted in no way to the technology. If Deacon had caught me, it would be infinitely more dangerous. An electronic engineer with a mobile phone in his hands. Phew.

As far as my 4 days period late it was starting to be pathological in me. First with Roger and now with Freddie. I tried to justify saying they were two passionate British males and when I wanted to think it was too late.

But when I confessed that last night I had consumed cocaine he wasn't so understanding. I think Fooling sincerely thought I was starting to pissing away the mission.

- I'm not going to do it again.

- God Black, you sound already like an addict with those sentences. Can't you see?

- Forgive me.

- I don't want to forgive you. I want you do your job without falling from the edge if it's possible.

- Freddie is under control.

- Can't you see it's him who control you each time? Think about it.

- No, Fooling. He lov...

Instantly I erased this sentence that I was going to write and rectified.

- He wants me and make me feel good. I'm happy with him.

- Oh, God. Do you love him?

- Well of course, as everybody.

- You know what I mean. Romantic love.

- Mousy! I'm home. Get out, you'll love this. You won't be able to finish it off, I assure you.

- I'm getting out. I gotta go. We're talking in the next report.

😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋

Freddie was right. A tour didn't leave time to sightseeing. When you notice there was another soundcheck, show, party till early morning. It was a vicious circle.

I wanted to experiment the same happy laxity from last night. The same feeling of belonging something with no effort. But in Mott the Hoople room to where we were invited there was not an ounce of coke.

I went discreetly into one of the members, Morgan, to ask him if there was a little bit of white dust.

- Sure, honey -he said with sleepy and bright blue eyes-. Do you have money to pay for it?

I nodded resolved. The truth is I had still quite a lot of money. Then he pointed me a guy who spoke with another Hoople member. I paid 30 dollars for half a gram and he stated that I could snort six or seven lines with that amount. I ran to the bath to snort a couple of lines. I lined it up nicely with my finger and wiped off the remainder. While I did it I said to myself three hundred times I wasn't an addict. I was just having fun.

I did a final touch to my nose and the party had no secrets to me. The cocaine was my best friend. It never failed me. It took everything good in me and multiplied by a thousand. Unlike the alcohol you didn't get stunned, it excited you but you could control where you were and what you did. It allowed me to have the needed faculties to watch out Freddie with a minimum of calm. I was always trying he couldn't be aware of it.

John and Roger had pulled and they slid covertly to their rooms with the girls. Brian had exchanged his guitar with Mick Ronson and they were doing a very interesting jam session. Freddie simply offered his conversation to a lot of people, fliting from flower to flower like a restless bee.

Suddenly one boy pushed him saying:

- Look, you've pissed me off, shitty diva.

The push made Freddie falling to the floor. Humilliated by the situation and arrogant as he could be when he proposed, in reprisal he tripped him up with his long legs. The boy cursed him on the floor. In a matter of minutes they started a kitten fight in which they scratched and pulled their magnificent manes.

Nobody cared to stop the fight, it was just one more show. I was ready to separate them when suddenly I saw clearly how the shouting boy hand grabbed Freddie's bulge with no intention to hurt him. It was a real and resounding fondle with overtones to becoming much more. But Freddie just giggled getting up the floor not trying to hide his erection in his black tight satin pants.

- Get away from me, asshole -he pointed out with his finger, furious.

Get away, Mr. colossal hard-on? But what are you playing, Fred?

Turning around he faced me. I must be the only one who stared at the scene with interest. His eyes devoured me all over in just one second. I was going to smooth his hair all messy for the fight and taking away my hand he grabbed it and heaved me into the bathroom.

- Freddie, what are you doing?

- You suit me just fine now, mousy.

He flipped me against the washbasin and lifting up my skirt till my waist, pulled down my panties till half my thigh. I was staring at him through the mirror in front of us with my heart beating almost in my throat with expectation.

- Do you care if I slide into your beautiful ass? Now I need it like this.

I felt my skin crawling when I noted the tip of his hard penis hitting my left buttock.

- No, Freddie -I gasped out.

- No? -he said plaintive with his penis touching again the curve of my buttock this time.

I'd never made anal sex and with no lubrication I heard it was very painful. And he was very horny, it looked like it was going to be fast and wild. I wasn't ready. Not yet.

- Next time. Not now, I beg you -I said in a barely audible voice trying to see his expression through the mirror.

I fished out with trembling fingers a condom from my bag. I torn myself the packaging with my teeth to make him sure I wanted doing it, I was definitely his. No matter what. In fact, my pussy throbbed wildly and in total tension.

- Fine, stand as you are -he said grabbing with energy the condom which I handed him and trying to hide his frustration tone-. Tonight I just wanna see your back. There's no need of a close up of your face while you cum.

He spread wider my legs and with an accurate lunge he slid inside me hard and fast. His strokes were really wild. It was as I imagined, fast and animal. So fast that there was no chance to even cum. He spent a few seconds with his incisors marking my backbone and then he came off with a muffled sigh. Later on he rearranged my panties delicately and pulled down my skirt.

On turning me around his eyes were much sweeter. Sure, he let off steam and he was soft and tame like a kitten just with its delicious meal. I stared at him while he took off naturally his preservative. He tucked his blouse in, staring closely at the mirror.

- Tell me I wasn't the boy who you wanted to fuck.

- Darling, don't be so twisted and perverse -he smiled combing his hair with his fingers, with energy.

- Why did you want to enter my back door then?

- My love, I know you aren't a sexual tome but you know that between a woman and a man this practice is very used too.

- Are you upset with me because I didn't want to...?

- No, honey. Your pussy is the most delicious thing in the whole world.

- It's not I don't want to... but...

- Shhh, it's enough. Don't talk about it. Hey, what have you got in that princess nose? -he checked I had a tiny white particle-. Who had invited you this time? -he said narrowing his eyes, spiteful.

- Nobody, I bought it.

- Won't you share it?

- Oh, sorry. Of course.

I stared at Freddie while quietly got ready two lines and snorted them over his lap. I watched greedy what left in the eight ball. Yes, I could have two more lines. Freddie seemed guessing the meaning of my glance.

- Keep it for the next time. Don't be greedy -he winked at me pecking my lips.