Chapter 29 Battle of Hearts and Minds

While Azi was conversing with Ben and Bail at the weapon shop's front counter, Shizu was contemplating her emotions, feelings, and thoughts.

She was thinking about her decision to make Azi her fiancé if he proved himself by passing her trials.

She felt that after getting to know him these past couple of days, she thought he could have a chance at being the one she was looking for. With the right training, he could be her partner, her equal, but she remembered just how weak willed he currently was and could not tell if he could really rise to her standards.

While Azi showed great valor, diligence, and potential strength, she still thought of him as a weak young man due to how he only showed this side of himself when his emotions went out of control. His usual self was too kind and didn't seem like the warrior type.

If Shizu wanted to make Azi her partner she would need to train him hard so that he would be able to control his emotions to bring out his full potential. But Shizu hesitated from subjecting Azi to her hellish training because of Kajima's warning to not control him through her actions.

Shizu understood that if she attempted to control Azi's growth, she might end up breaking him if she is too rough with him. She also did not want to intentionally deny him his right to choose his own path but she needed to keep him here in Kujyuri.

The kiss of fealty was one way she had succeeded in binding Azi to her, but she felt somewhat depressed that her relationship with him was founded upon a need to use him for the benefit of the nation.

It wasn't like those fairy tale stories she read as a child where there was the idea of true love. She knew that her future relationship with him was going to be a political one for the good of the nation, but it somewhat irked her as it now felt wrong to think like that after kissing him.

Their kissing incident caused Shizu's emotions to go out of control and subsequently she began to second guess herself. Her ideals and feelings began clashing with each other in a never ending battle in her mind.

As she tried to figure out what the next best course of action would be, Shizu looked around to find out what Azi was doing. Maybe by observing him a bit, she felt that she could make a better decision. Seeing that he was near the weapon racks, she saw him pick up a small kite shield to examine how it felt in his hand.

This reminded her of how he fought a gengiri in one-on-one combat. To her, he still looked weak and helpless which annoyed her as she wanted to train that weakness out of him. This broke her out of the constant indecision in her mind as she plainly decided to do things her own way.

Really, Shizu is a somewhat simple person and she was indeed like the harsh teachers from Azi's memories of character archetypes. Nevertheless, like all strong willed women, she resolved herself to accept and fix whatever shortcomings would become of her choices.

After making her declaration and being direct with what she wanted to do, Shizu now stood across from Azi on a large open clearing with the ground caked in a thin layer of snow. This clearing was a section of land next to Ben and Bail's shop where they tested their creations.

In Shizu's left hand was a metal club of 1 meter in length and 3 inches thick, in the other was a broadsword of 1 meter. The heavy weapons she held contrasted with the lightweight option Azi had chosen.

He had again equipped a small kite shield on his left arm and a short sword of 40 centimeters in length. Before the match began, Azi asked a question in a loud voice as they were quite a distance away from each other.

"So why are we doing this!?"

"I need to clear my head and a good fight will do just that. There will be no holding back like last night. This time I'm fighting you with the intent to kill. This will also be your first lesson as my apprentice."

Azi swore that he saw an angry oni like face emanating behind Shizu which made him tremble a bit in fear.

With a pleading expression he looked at Ben and Bail for help. The pair returned his pleading with 4 thumbs up as they had fake smiles on their faces. Azi then said to himself in a soft voice no one could hear.

"Oh I am so f**k*d."

No longer wanting to wait, Shizu turned to Bail.

"START THE MATCH!"

His ears hurting from her loud voice, Bail whispered to Ben.

"You think it's that time of the month for the lass."

Punching his twin in the shoulder he chided him.

"Idiot!! Shut up and just start the match!!!"

Bail sighed and raised his arm up to give the signal. "WARRIORS! READY!!!!!! HOLD!!!!"

Tensing up, Azi positioned his small shield to his front, which made Shizu frown in contempt. Picking up on this, Azi was about to ask about her expression but was cut off before he could.

"BEGIN!!!!!"

In the next moment Shizu rushed forward and was in front of Azi within moments. This caught him off guard as it seemed she was really riled up since she was moving faster than usual.

From Azi's perspective, Shizu looked like an approaching blur as she moved left and right to confuse him and throw his stance off balance.

Taking his momentary confusion as a chance, she struck out and swung her iron club against his small kite shield. Azi could instantly feel his left arm go numb and felt that his insides were reeling back from the impact. He didn't feel that he took any damage, but he felt himself reflexively grimace from the force of Shizu's strike that made his legs tremble like a newborn calf.

After Shizu's purposefully wild and wide swing, Azi believed that an opportunity showed itself as her left side was now exposed.

He struck with his short sword, but only swung at the air since Shizu had quickly sidestepped the strike and, again, brought down her iron club upon his shield. This time she increased the number of times she swung.

Three heavy blows landed on Azi's shield which caused it to slightly crack and creak under the impacts.

Huffing and puffing as his breaths became heavy, he began to really grimace from the new pain in his left arm. Azi felt that he was tiring quickly and knew that he was going to lose at this rate. He thought to use body reinforcement but had no time to focus as Shizu was relentless.

"Is that all?"

Gritting his teeth in annoyance at her remark, Azi gambled a charge and pushed his shield forward to strike her stomach. Again, his attempt to attack was dodged easily but Azi did not give up.

Using his short sword and shield in concert, he swung each in a quick rhythm in an attempt to overwhelm her with numerous attacks.

The look on Shizu's face hardened as she began to quicken her steps and sharpen her focus, the effects of her changed demeanor were visible as she was purposefully dodging Azi's attacks by only a hair's breadth.

This began to frustrate Azi as he lost track of how many times he missed. His ever-rising emotions caused him to make a mistake as he accidently swung too widely with his short sword which left his right flank open.

Shizu did not take the opportunity to attack his exposed flank but instead opted to strike with her iron club upon his shield. This time she did not stop after the first, second, or third strike. The strikes from Shizu's iron club were merciless and unending, and she even began to increase the speed and intensity of her swings.

This put Azi on the defensive and then into utter submission as he was being blown every which way by her strikes. Ben and Bail witnessed the harsh beating with pained faces. They worried that Shizu was going to kill Azi at this rate but knew that they should not butt into a matter concerning a well-known ordained knight.

Delivering one last heavy swing to Azi's shield, he responded and was able to avoid taking too much damage by slightly hopping to disperse the impact throughout his body. The force instead helped to propel him backwards to gain some distance from Shizu.

She could have continued her onslaught by rushing forward to chase him but decided to stop and speak. Her tone was harsh and disappointed.

"How long? Just how long do you think you can fight like this? You fight like a coward, instead of facing your opponent with your sword you hide behind that shield. Sure, that shield protected me but what if it fails. I can already see that the shield in your hand is already crumbling."

Prompted by her words, Azi looked at his shield and he had to agree, it was falling apart. The metal was bent in all the wrong ways and cracks marred its surface. He knew that the shield was completely useless at this point as the material was going to soon fail in holding its shape.

Azi responded with an annoyed tone through his heavy breaths.

"Your ... point?"

"My point is that after that shield fails, what will you do next? What will protect you?"

Through his exhaustion, he leveled his sword at Shizu and glared with a bit of pride in his eyes.

"My sword."

"And, If that fails?"

"My Body."

"AND IF YOU FAIL!?"

Stunned by her harsh shouting, Azi fell into deep contemplation to try find a reasonable answer to her question. His contemplation then turned to frustration as he could not come up with a response. His ever-growing emotional state only served to inhibit his mind from thinking clearly and rationally.

The frustration was soon replaced by anger and he heard a voice in his head speaking out to him.

'FAIL FAIL IM GOING TO FAIL AGAIN, NO, MUST OVERCOME OBSTACLE, MUST BEAT IT, KILL, KILL, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY, ENEMY.....'

The atmosphere around Azi was starting to grow heavy and his body began to shake in anger. In his out-of-control state of mind, Azi lifted his head to find where the enemy was with an expression of pure hatred and bestial emotion.

His sights fell onto Shizu who stared at him with a stern expression. New thoughts came to Azi's mind as his vision was filled by her disappointment directed solely at him. The frown she had for him did not anger him but instead worked to bore a hole in his heart.

'Shizu! why, why, why. Am I failing? Is this punishment for what I did? Is it because I didn't know my place? Why are you subjecting me to this? WHY!!!'

These new thoughts ran through his mind and brought with it a wave of sadness that helped to dowse the anger in his mind. But he was still not in control as the two differing emotions fought for control. The two emotions clashed unendingly in his mind but from their clashing came a sudden spark deep within Azi's subconscious.

He then felt a warmth in his chest that began to permeate his body. It then overcame and overwhelmed his previously out of control anger and sadness. Azi recognized that the warmth was a nostalgic emotion from his past, but he was unable to remember what it truly was. Nevertheless, he let it spread throughout his body.

The warm feeling gave Azi a new sense of invigoration and passion that helped to re-energize his body. His mind was now clearing up and he could feel that he got back a bit of who he once was. Additionally, a suitable answer to Shizu's question came to mind.

Azi looked up from his slumped posture and now had a fire in his eyes as tears streamed down his face.

"I WON'T!"

His declaration filled with self-assurance and confidence now on his face, he tightened his grip on his weapons and soon let them go lax as a warm smile formed on his lips.

(A shounen moment that I hoped to have the character realize a part of himself.)

(Comment on what you think the feeling or emotion was.)

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