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Trash of the Royal Castle

Prince Blueblood is many things. He's a Unicorn, He's royalty, He's a stallion, He's entitled, He's high-class, And most importantly he's not here right now. If Blueblood isn't here right now, then who's that? Well, That's Blueblood, the new Blueblood that is, a human in the body of Blueblood. What will follow the actions of the new prince can be nothing short of disastrous. ---------------------------------------- Warning, this story contains Talking Animals, Magic, Politics, Mentions of Gore and Sex, and a lot of violence. You have been warned.

Netapel · Tranh châm biếm
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122 Chs

Chapter 80: Star vs Moon

Canterlot Castle, the seat of power of the Nation of Equestria, is a place where motion can be found anywhere.

From the barracks of the guards training harder than ever, to the corridors of Servants moving to and fro, passing along messages or just cleaning the floor.

The Throne room, where dignitaries from far and wide visit to pay their respect to the Princess of the Sun, and even the Many gardens of the castle, some open to the public for tourism.

But today was different, every soul in the castle that was off their duty or resting all came to the same spot to watch a fantastic scene.

To watch a Princess Fight.

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Standing at the edge of an empty ballroom, Princess Luna stretched her legs as she waited for her opponent to enter through the door on the opposite side of the ballroom.

She moved her eyes to a small indoor balcony, watching her sister speak with Raven Inkwell and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, a bubble of protective magic surrounding the three mares courtesy of Captain Shining Armor.

Luna looked back to the door of the ballroom as she took a deep breath to realign her thoughts, spotting from the corner of her eye Captain Armor whispering with another pony she couldn't see, before delivering whatever message he received to Princess Celestia.

Luna shook her head, she couldn't have any of these distractions, she had a Fight to win.

She took the time to try and remember what she knew of her Opponent.

Prince Blueblood Platinum...

She never directly fought with him, and subsequently, she never saw him fight himself. The closest she's gotten to seeing the Prince in combat was when one of Nightmare Moon's minions took over his body.

But that was less of a fight and more of a child wildly throwing around magic once his traps were avoided.

Luna frowned at that, She had no clue as to what she could expect from the Prince, other than an Illusion or two, but even that posed a problem to her.

How powerful are his illusions? The most she'd seen from him was a set of clothing, and while the illusion was undoubtedly high quality, it didn't really tell her anything other than that Prince Blueblood knew how to make realistic-looking clothes, something any Practitioner of the art could accomplish fairly easily.

Luna shook her head, once again clearing her mind before she refocused on the door as it opened.

And felt her brain halt as she watched the prince stroll in as if he were in the mall picking out which restaurant he wanted to eat lunch in.

The audacity of this stallion...

Luna couldn't help but laugh.

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Princess Cadance looked down from the balcony at the two royals who stood at opposite ends of the empty ballroom, a small frown crossed her face at the thought of the two of them coming to blows, but she shook it off as she reminded herself that it was in a controlled environment and Princess Celestia would step in should anything drastic occur.

"Now that the two participants are here, Allow me to explain the rules," Princess Celestia spoke up, her voice sounding not only in the ballroom but also in the garden outside, where many servants and guards stood close to the windows to watch the upcoming spectacle.

"None of the participants are allowed to leave the Ballroom," Princess Celestia said as she looked down at her Sister and Son, "None of the participants are allowed to inflict permanent bodily harm onto the other, The fight will end whenever one of the participants surrenders or is deemed unable to continue," 

Cadance turned back to Luna and Blueblood, Watching the smirk growing on her cousin's face as a confused frown grew on Luna's.

"He has a plan," She thought to herself before her eyes focused on Luna.

"And finally, In the essence of fairness, Princess Luna is not allowed to use her Magic," Cadance watched as Luna's eyes widened into saucers as she looked at Princess Celestia, before turning to glare at the laughing Prince Blueblood.

"Let the fight, Commence!"

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As soon as those words left Princess Celestia's mouth, Princess Luna opened hers.

"What did you do?!" She yelled at the Prince.

"Me?" He tilted his head in confusion before looking to check behind him to see if there was someone else, "I merely wanted to even the playing field," He explained in a calm tone of voice.

"You-" Luna grits her teeth as Prince Blueblood continues to speak.

"You see, I am just a measly little Pony, A tiny little Unicorn, who cannot hope to match the power of an Alicorn such as yourself, Princess Luna," Luna felt her stomach twist as the Prince spoke, the words leaving his mouth some that she never expected to hear from the proud and confident Stallion.

 "You have the Magic of a Unicorn, the Flight of a Pegasus, and the Strength of an Earth Pony to top it all off! Why, to me it seems like an unfair advantage in this little bout, Practically a One v Three if you think about it," Blueblood started walking the perimeter of the Ballroom, his eyes never leaving Luna as he spoke.

Luna started walking in the opposite direction as him, her eyes glued to any small movement he could make as the two ponies circled each other.

"So you convinced our Sister to give you a handicap, Is that it?" Luna asked, waiting for the moment he'd open his mouth to answer her.

"Luna-" And as the Prince said her name, the floor beneath her cracked as she kicked herself towards Blueblood, her front leg punching him in the face.

"-You're not as clever as you look," Prince Blueblood's voice surrounded her from all directions as her hoof passed through his torso, The prince turned to look down at her before he disappeared into a cloud of smoke.

A Smoke that filled her vision, white and thick, she could barely see in front of her, but her breath was fine.

"An Illusion," She whispered to herself as she closed her eyes and focused on her wings.

"Without our magic, we cannot cast a cleansing spell to remove your illusion," She said out loud, hearing her voice echo around her, the tips of her feathers vibrating in an imaginary humm.

"But just because we cannot use magic," She moved forward, a sixth sense pulling her in a certain direction, her feather's vibrating faster and faster "Does not mean we CANNOT SENSE IT!"

And with a stomp on the floor, Luna felt her hoof impact an object that wasn't there, the smoke disappearing from her view to reveal a Grey Crystal Orb, smashed beneath her hooves.

A Crystal Orb with a design that reminded Luna of a very important night.

Without waiting, She flapped her wings and flew to the side, avoiding the beam of golden light that flew passed where she just stood moments prior, causing more cracks to appear on the floor.

Luna flew up, her head watching more and more Golden Orbs appearing as if out of thin air, all with the engraving of Blueblood's Cutie Mark on them, acting as a focus for their magic as they flew after her, shooting beams of golden magic.

Just like that Nightmare did when he took over his Body.

With a twist of her body, Luna dove to the ground, breaking two more orbs in the process and feeling a searing heat on her left hind leg which she promptly ignored as she flew near the floor of the Ballroom, Intent on locating where the Prince was keeping himself invisible.

"Luna, Luna, Luna~" She heard his voice tut at her from all around, the Invisible Prince not leaving a hint as to where he was hiding, "You can't keep running away from this fight,"

"You are the one who is running away, Blueblood!" Luna cried as she turned her body midair, her legs landing on the wall before she kicked off once more, "Show yourself so we can teach you a lesson!"

"Show Myself? And give away my advantage? Why should I do that? I'm winning, aren't I?"

Luna chuckled, "No, Friend Blueblood! We are the ones who are winning this bout! It won't be long before your magic runs out as you keep and try to hit us!" She twirled through the air before diving down like a majestic bird, Breaking several more golden orbs as she landed on the ground and rolled to the side, letting the golden shards crash behind her.

"...You are mistaken, Princess Luna~" Blueblood's voice sounded louder in the ballroom once the last of the Golden orbs shattered under Luna's heels, "~While you were running around, breaking my orbs, you have yet to notice that it was all a distraction~" Luna ignored his obnoxious giggle as she quickly looked around her, Staring at the clean floor and walls of the ballroom as her mind connected the dots.

"You weren't aiming for us!" Luna exclaimed as the Illusion that kept the floor and walls of the room clean disappeared, showcasing to the princess the extent of the damage done to the ballroom.

From cracks and shards of the floor lying about the room to lines of burns on the walls, the room looked like a travesty, but that wasn't enough to tell her what could constitute his plan, unless of course his goal was to ruin a room, and Luna doubted that.

Suddenly her feathers stiffened as she threw herself into another roll on the ground, avoiding a shard of Marble flooring that flew at her side before it crashed back to the floor.

Luna jumped into the air, her wings allowing her to reach the high ceiling of the ballroom, where she watched the third part of Blueblood's strategy.

Shards of marble flew at each other, striking each other like cobbled rocks in a construction site, held together by blue magic, Like a Skeleton, more and more shards from the floor hit the clump of blue magic and held together on it, like skin and muscle as whatever Blueblood was creating started to form a shape.

The Shape of a Torso, similar to a Minotaur or a Diamond Dog, with two long arms dangling from its marble shoulders like lifeless rope.

It was a Torso with Arms, its hands barely more than shards of Marble held with magic in the approximate shape of a claw. It lacked a head and legs, but it still floated there in front of her, needing neither.

"One of the biggest issues I had with fighting Crystal Lips, or whatever her name is, Was that I had to get close to her in order to hit her in the face~" Blueblood's voice seemed to come from several directions at once, but more importantly from where the Head of the floating Torso should be in, Luna glared at it and readied her body.

"So I came up with a solution, It might seem like me stealing someone else's Idea, But I don't really care~" He kept talking, as the blue magic that held the Body together seemed to intensify, the cracks on its body filling in with what looked like burning blue flames, as if the Statue was a marble volcano that was filled with Blue Lava.

And with a Burst of Blue Flame, The Skull of a Snake appeared on top of the Statue, a pair of backward-turning horns protruding from the serpentine Skull, before it was engulfed with blue fire, clearly an Illusion as Luna felt no heat from the flames. A Long Serpentine tail extended from the bottom of the statue, ending with what looked like the stinger of a Scorpion, made out of more Marble.

The flaming skull on the Statue turned to look at Luna as Blueblood continued, "And here it is!"

The statue raised its arms into what Luna assumed was a boxing stance, "A Way to punch my opponent without getting close!"

The statue leaned forward, a sound escaping its nonexistent lips in what seemed to be a hissed chuckle, like a snake trying to laugh. 

"I Call it~" Blueblood paused for dramatic effect, The eye sockets of the flaming skull seeming to light up with a golden glow from within the skull.

"Pluto~"

And the statue blurred forward.

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Cadance leaned closer to the ledge of the balcony, her eyes glued onto the Magical Statue that her cousin created, Staring at the Skull on top of its shoulders, as a small smirk climbed up her lips.

"Aww, You do like her~" She whispered as she watched the Arms of the statue strike at Princess Luna, "I'll tell her tonight," Her leg moved to hold the necklace around her neck, feeling the crystal shards that were held there.

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"Plu~" Was all the warning Princess Luna was given from the Statue before its arms punched forward with unnatural speed, "Totototototototototo~" Each cry was met with a punch, And for once Luna was glad that Earth Pony strength came with an Earth Pony's unnatural resilience.

She ignored the sounds of Blueblood Laughing from all around her, joy filling his voice as his statue fought for him, punching her in his stead.

Luna took a deep breath, ignoring the ache in her chest as a fist managed to pass through her defenses before she punched back.

Shattering the marble that made up Pluto's arm, smirking widely at the scene.

Only to scowl as the shattered marble flew back and repaired the arm, "Crud..."

"Plutoooo~ Plutotototototototo~" The Statue's hail of punches returned, but this time Luna was prepared.

"You're only as tough as Marble!" She yelled as she ducked, rolled onto her back, and pushed herself with her front legs, using her back legs to deliver a devastating kick onto the Marble Torso of the statue, "And you don't fight back while you're repairing yourself!" Luna pushed herself up from the floor, standing on her back left leg as her right leg started to kick at the damaged statue, shattering more of its body.

"It seems I need to work on the design a bit longer before I put it to work in the field..." She heard Blueblood say, but she quickly ignored him in favor of breaking more of the statue, Jumping into the air as the tail of the statue passed below her in an attempt to take out her legs, before she slammed back down onto the ground, shattering the marble stinger of the tail.

"...You know..." Blueblood's voice spoke up once more, now coming from directly behind Pluto, "If this was a fight to the death I would have won..." Luna froze at those words as she watched Pluto crumble down to the floor, revealing Prince Blueblood standing behind him.

"So~" Blueblood moved his neck from side to side, hearing the snapping sound of his bones before he continued, "Let me show you one final trick~" His voice was calm and even, a far cry from his joyful laughter just a minute earlier.

And before Luna could kick into the air again, the Ballroom was flooded in darkness.

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This darkness wasn't like the Illusionary Smokescreen he created at the start of the match, Where she could still somewhat see her surroundings as she searched for the caster, This was deeper.

Pure Black enveloped her surroundings, unable to even see her own hoof over her eyes.

"Clover the Clever wrote that the school of Illusion Magic has three possible spells that would grant someone the title of Master," A Light appeared in the darkness, a spotlight that showed her Blueblood, following him as he walked closer to her, not a worry in his steps.

Almost as if he was assured of his victory.

"One of these spells, Is an Illusion that could not be dispelled, Something that could leave the target in an endless hell for the rest of their lives~" Blueblood kept talking as he continued to approach her, not bothered by the words coming from his mouth.

Luna tried to move, to get closer to him, to end this stupid spar and punch that annoying Stallion in the face.

"The second was an Illusion that could affect every living creature in the world, regardless of proximity to the caster, an Illusion that will affect everybody~" Luna struggled to move, her legs felt like they were knee-deep in the stickiest tar in the world, unable to free her.

"And third, but definitely not least, Was an Illusion that could affect the physical world, An Illusion that shaped Reality itself~" Prince Blueblood paused just in front of her, close enough to reach out his leg and cup her cheek in his hoof.

Because that's exactly what he did.

"What is this Blueblood!" Luna yelled at her opponent, staring into his Ice-Blue eyes as he rubbed her cheek, treating her like a foal, Looking down at her.

Blueblood Frowned at her, as if in disappointment at her inability to get where he's going, "Allow me to show you a glimpse of the third magic," He said calmly.

And then the darkness that surrounded the two disappeared, sinking away into the ground to reveal her standing atop a pillar over the abyss.

She tried to move, but found that her body refused to listen to her.

"Forcing the Alignment," Blueblood spoke, but his voice didn't sound like he was speaking to her, but instead as if reading out loud.

"An Incantation?!" Luna exclaimed in surprise, This was the first time she'd heard Prince Blueblood chant the words of a spell, her eyes widened at the thought.

What kind of spell would Prince Blueblood Platinum attempt to cast, whatever it could be, if his little speech before this was anything to go by, Luna didn't want to be on the receiving end of it.

But without the use of her magic, she couldn't escape, at least not without forfeiting the match.

She took a deep breath and readied herself as much as she could, whatever Blueblood threw at her, she'd take it head-on.

Suddenly, a source of heat appeared behind Luna, and she grits her teeth as the uncomfortable heat stung at her back.

She turned her head to look behind her, only to gape her mouth at the sight.

The Sun.

Looming over her like an ancient colossal, an unmovable obstacle that burned and destroyed any who dared approach it.

As she stared at the giant celestial object, she could only tremble as another moved in front of it in a vain attempt to block the heat from reaching her.

Mercury.

Another Planet followed, stopping in front of Mercury and blocking the smaller object from gazing upon her.

Venus.

Luna felt her breath hitch as an even smaller Celestial Object moved in front of Venus, one which Luna could recognize like the back of her hoof.

The Moon.

"What are you doing?!" She turned back to Blueblood, her body on edge as her mane started to blow in a nonexistent wind, her eyes widening as the red planet appeared behind the prince, lowering so as to not block the view from the other Planets behind it.

For an entire minute, Luna watched with awe and horror as the entire Solar System seemed to bow to Blueblood, Planets and Moons aligning themselves in a straight line, moving out of the path of the other so they could create a seemingly flat plane, an unobstructed path of the Celestial Giants.

She watched with held breath as Blueblood Stopped his wordless chanting as he lifted his horn high above him, the tip of his horn seeming to touch the farthest celestial object, so far away that even in this illusionary world where they all stood closer to the other, it was barely more than a speck of dust far in the distance.

She watched as the speck in the distance started to glow with bright golden light, as Prince Blueblood stared into her eyes and finished his Spell.

"This is a Spell born of a broken Star," His voice seemed to echo around the pillar standing over the empty void the two found themselves in, the light from the far off speck growing larger and- No, It was growing closer!

"PALE BLUE DOT"

Luna watched in silent awe as a beam of burning light traveled the cosmos, shattering the planets below it as it raced closer and closer to her unmoving body.

She watched Uranus and Neptune burn underneath the heat produced by the light.

She watched the rings of Saturn shatter and break away as the light passed through them.

She watched the light disappear as it got close to Jupiter, only to burst out of the gas giant like a blade through a body.

And as the light broke through the Belt of Asteroids that separated Mars from Jupiter, she heard Blueblood speak.

"I Forfeit,"

And faster than she could blink, the entire world around her changed as she found herself back in the Ballroom, the crumbled form of the marble statue at her hooves, as she watched Blueblood stretch his legs on the other side of Pluto.

"I'm out of magic," He said lightly as an explanation, "That physical Illusion thing is incredibly taxing," He chuckled as he walked over to her and helped her stand, her legs still shaking as the sight of the celestial object remained in her psyche.

"Anyway, I'm hungry, I heard a new Indian place opened up in the Food Street that I wanted to check out, let's go," He walked passed her before standing at the door behind her.

"Are you waiting for a formal letter or something? Let's go!" He called out to her with his usual smirk, and Luna felt herself let out a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"Heh, Haha! We won!" She cheered as she pointed at the Prince, a wide smile on her face, "We told you we'd win!"

Blueblood tilted his head at her and looked at her as if she said something stupid, "Well, Yeah. I forfeited since I ran low on magic and Didn't want to spend the rest of the week aching all the time," He smiled down at her as he clapped.

"Congratulations, Princess Luna, You who lived hundreds of years have successfully managed to beat a Unicorn with no formal combat training of any kind, You must be so proud of yourself," Luna ignored his attempt to poke at her as she continued to laugh at him.

"Ahaha! That means you shall be the one paying for the food!"

"Yes, Obviously, I'm the one who's inviting you, It would be weird if I had you pay," Luna ignored him again as she jogged over on shaky legs and caught up with the prince.

"Onward, Friend Blueblood! To this new restaurant that shall bring us our lunch!" Luna laughed happily as she leaned her body on Blueblood, letting the Stallion carry her like the loser of a gladiatorial arena carried the victor as his mount.

"To Lunch!" Blueblood rolled his eyes but kept moving, carrying the Princess on his back as the duo made their way to the restaurant, followed by a small squad of guards to protect them.

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Princess Celestia stared at the ruined ballroom below her, a small smile on her face as she wiped tears from her eyes.

"They grow up so fast~"