Evangelist & Franchise

— You’re unluckier than getting a box of socks that are too small to wear for a Christmas present, Franchise! You know what I mean?

Said Evangelist while she looked at her partner. The woman was slightly above average height and had a naturally fit body. Her long wavy hair went past her shoulders, purple for the first few inches off her scalp and a faded blonde for the rest of it. The pair walked thought a small, enclosed corridor, dragging their feet on the snow.

— I can’t tell if you’re underplaying it or just not paying any attention.

Said Franchise, the unluckiest man in the world. He had orange hair and wore a light blue tiara to push it all backwards. He was about the size of his friend and just as muscular. They were both dressed in tight pants and tight sweaters, all black.

— You think I’m underplaying it? Imagine getting a box of socks you can’t wear! That is every woman’s nightmare… and during the winter too? Oh, no…

She says, having shivers go down her spine. Only the Gods may forgive her for thinking such accursed thoughts. Masha Maleviento, now referred to as, Franchise. Born on Friday the 13th. His parents, somehow, failed to witness his birth and he never knew happiness. He, also, constantly stubs his toe on nearby furniture. Whenever he made friends, they would start suffering from all kinds of troubles and illnesses. Eventually they would all distance themselves from him and Franchise was hated by everyone. He was considerate, the embodiment of bad omens, and led a life of frustrations.

But for some reason, there was someone always next to him, unaffected by his curse.

His lifelong friend, Evangelist, also known as, Evangelist. She was born exactly 1 second after him and has lived an amazing life so far. The fact that everything goes wrong for him, and him alone, made her think that on that very second, the Universe had unleashed a wave of bad luck. But he was the only one born at that very second, so it all went to him. However, as Searchers of the Wetlands, it was their job to hunt down monsters and uncover lost relics, with or without luck.

The two of them finally arrive at the Lapse. A place where they receive their orders and permissions to hunt. Franchise stepped forward. He’d be the one to talk to the attendant, as per custom. His girl friend had a deep seeded hatred for the creature after she lost 709 matches of ping-pong to it and with that, her love of sports.

— Hyuga! — He called out.

In a well-lighted, pitch-black room, a large creature stood behind a small desk, three times smaller than its user. Hyuga was a thin monster made out of a soft and reflective white stone. He had six long arms, all quadruple jointed, coming from his back. In the place where the mouth should be, an iron plate nailed to his face, with the engravings “Out of Spite”. Scattered around the monster’s bald head, seven pink mouths who moved on their own accord.

— Out of Spite today, huh? — He comments.

— Maleviento, Masha. — The thing utters, looking down at him. — Donovan, Ir —

— TO HELL WITH YOU HYUGA!! — She says, tearing up. — HOW DARE YOU SAY MY NAME AFTER WHAT YOU DID TO ME! I LOVED PING-PONG—

— Enough. — Franchise shuts his friend. — Highest rarity, what do you got for us?

— Golden Calling. — Hyuga says with his thunder-powered voice.

Handing them a small golden slab. Their certificate for searching; their specific orders and the description of the item desired. The two of them have their interest skyrocket. Golden callings into action were immensely rare. Only 1 in every trillion searches, do they appear (not true).

It was their lucky day too. A claim on the Highest Rarity Relic had been put out, meaning they had an excuse to search for it. An immensely powerful artifact known as the Shattered Essence. Capable of rewriting the very rules of the universe. Evangelist didn’t care much for it, even though it could mean a world of trouble if it were used with evil intentions. She was simply excited to help Franchise get it so that he could remove his bad luck. They didn’t even need to share a look to know why they wanted to get it. Hyuga continues:

— Rating of 16 in the following categories. Power. Rarity. Influence. Utility. And Fragrance.

— A 16 on Fragrance? Wow, that’s a first. — She said, shocked.

— It has a 16 on everything. — He thinks out loud, all the more intrigued. — All the more reason to get it…

— Now off with you two. — Hyuga picks up a small bell from his tiny desk and rings it.

Franchise and Evangelist slowly fade away. While doing so, Franchise casually checks his smartphone and Evangelist flips off Hyuga. Which the monster answered by flipping her off too, with all his hands. Once they finally disappear, Hyuga places his hands over his iron plate and slowly wipes it. When he finished, he returned to his normal duties. But the words imprinted on the plate changed to: “Wired Fate.”

Franchise and Evangelist reappear at a path between fields of flowers. The flowers were blue and white, and its petals kept being blown away with the wind, coloring the landscape around them. Walking on the fields, were tall, slender creatures. They were bipedal, but had no hands or feet. They were like giant thin branches that fell from an even more giant tree and had a singular bottomless hole for faces.

— Party People? Are we on Depth 5? — Evangelist, comments, looking around.

— Seems like it. An item of that rarity had to show up here. And I already called them up.

— Good. I don’t like being down here without our friends nearby.

The Wetlands were divided into Depths. And even though it wasn’t a height thing, since they all existed at the same plane, the deeper the Depth of a region, the more dangerous they were. On the other hand, regions of higher Depth, were home to greater treasures. It was the duty of the Searchers to transfer these regions and recover these treasures. But Depth 5 was a living hell. Because they were home to the creatures known as the Party People.

These slender sticks of hell were unkillable and the longer they engaged in combat, the stronger they became. They were highly aggressive and could chase their prey until the end times. They feed on the soul of the fallen, and it’s suggested that they do it for fun, since they don’t need anything to live. Only highly skilled Searchers could face them.

The pair doesn’t get a chance to move. As soon as they stopped talking, the 14 creatures that were walking by, turned their attention to them. The creatures start to surround them, and the duo prepares for combat.

— Oh, they noticed us so fast! — Evangelist weeps, genuinely frustrated. — It’s that damn luck of yours again!

— Calling my lack of luck, luck, defeats the purpose of the word unlucky. — Franchise says, licking the tips of the fingers of his right hand.

— It’s that damn unlucky of yours again? — She tried correcting herself, while taking out a pair of red scissors from her waistline.

One of the Party People makes their move, diving towards the duo, ready to suck them into his face-hole. The two dodges, going into separate directions. Franchise uses the speed of his dash to slice the legs off the creature that attacked them. His right hand, or rather the tip of his fingers, cut through their durable bodies like butter.

The creatures scream and cheer, as if they were celebrating something. They turn their attention to Franchise, who kept moving between their legs and cutting them down with his right hand. The Party People fall, but soon get back up after using their arms for legs and regenerating new legs for arms.

Franchise climbs on the back of one and slices off its head. The creature falls and Franchise jumps off of it, unto another, guiding his hand through its body until it crumbled into bits. On the ground, a Party Person comes from behind, ready to absorb into its face. But Franchise turns around and pierces its head with his hand. Cutting through the hole and the magic void it had. Franchise removes his hand from its motionless body and looks around him.

The other 13 creatures were fighting with one another.

— Finally. — Franchise sighs.

— It takes time to find the right strand, you know that, I don’t know why you get so angry when I take my time with it.

— You practice with the whole purpose of finding them faster. That means you’re not trying hard enough.

— Oh, Franchise, you’re assuming I practice. Cute. Come here so I can cut you too.

— Please, let’s get this going.