26

sits in the gallery looking over OR 1, going between reading a new article and watching Meredith's surgery for her rare tumor. Owen was seated beside her, and Eleanora was sure he was on the verge of passing out.

The door to the gallery opens, Derek entering it. Eleanora sends him a smile before looking back at the article in front of her, highlighting a passage.

"Hey." Derek greeted, looking into the OR. He sat beside Eleanora, sighing a bit. "That's a big tumor."

"Yeah, it is." Owen agreed. Eleanora grinned, looking up at her friend with pride in her eyes.

"It's her first big tumor. I'm so proud."

"She didn't even tell me about it." Derek states. Eleanora winces, sending him an apologetic look. He just pats her shoulder reassuringly, and Hunt raises a brow. "I found out through one of my interns."

After a moment, Derek came to a conclusion, shaking his head a bit. "My wife is bubble wrapping me."

"No, I don't think-" Eleanora tries, but her tone shows she doesn't actually believe her own words. Derek shakes his head, a little shocked.

"She is."

"Shepherd," Owen starts, "you have a reputation for needing to be bubble wrapped."

"Excuse me?"

"Excuse you?"

Eleanora and Derek both spoke at the same time, giving Owen a very identical '' look. He gave them a small laugh before continuing.

"You fight for your patients against the worst possible odds, but when things get messy personally, you're gone. Off to the woods to drink and grow a beard."

"And with everything that's happened and this lawsuit keeping it all alive, maybe she just....worried that the slightest little thing was gonna make you run off to that trailer and leave her alone in the house you gave her, not sleeping at night because whichever room she lays down in, she just can't get away from the fact that you're just not there."

Eleanora states off into the OR, listening to Hunts words. They hit a little too close to home and she finds herself fiddling with her rings. She chews at the inside of her cheek, her mind whirling as she thinks about all the nights she had to spend feeling alone just because Mark wasn't able to look her in the eyes.

He was better now, with her at least. They had slowly become normal again, being affectionate and being able to just be . But he just wasn't all the way there, wasn't able to let her look at him for too long if he didn't have his shirt on, couldn't look her in the eyes after a nightmare.

"Sounds like you had that all teed up and ready to go." Derek sasses, making Eleanora give a small snort as she focused back on the two men beside her.

"Did you practice it in the mirror, Chief?"

"You two are unbelievable." Hunt laughed, Eleanora and Derek both grinning. "I had a version of it. It was meant for somebody else, you know, but uh, it kind of works here, too."

"You don't think she's coming back." Derek stated. Eleanora's face fell and she looked down at her article, his eyes falling on her. "You don't think so, either."

"I hope she will." Eleanora said softly, fiddling with the edge of one of the pages. "Hope she'll come back and everything will be a little more....normal. But I don't think she will, because nothing is the same. Not anymore."

_____

walks into the bathroom, towel in hand. She planned on showering and going to bed seeing as she had a spinal tumor removal in the morning.

However, when she walked into the bathroom, she was met with Mark, shirtless and poking at his scar. Her eyes widen a bit and she freezes, not knowing what to do.

Mark eyes her in the mirror and stiffens himself, but he doesn't move to grab his shirt. He slowly tears his eyes off of her and back to his chest, poking at the middle of the big scar that was on his sternum.

"I hate this thing." He spoke out, voice thick and heavy. "It makes me feel ugly, a-and reminds me of the damn woods. Reminds me of Max, a-and Lexie, of holding both of their hands as they..."

Eleanora blinked away a few tears, staring at him quietly. She didn't want to say anything and ruin this moment, afraid he would hear her voice and then crawl back into the shell he had been hiding in.

"I...." Mark gave a dry chuckle, moving his hands to grip the edge of the counter. "I have never felt ugly or less than attractive a day in my life. And now I have to look in the mirror and hate myself."

Eleanora slowly walked over, and she hesitated to move her hand to his arm. After a moment, she did, and he softened a bit at the feeling of her skin against his.

She reached her other hand out to take him by the cheek and turn his face to her. They locked eyes but stayed silent, not having to say anything.

Mark moved his body a bit so he was facing her, and Eleanora finally looked down at the scarred chest in front of her. She slowly and carefully let her fingers dance across it, Mark wincing a bit but not objecting.

After a moment, she leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to the top of his scar and placed her head there, closing her eyes. Mark slowly wrapped his arms around her and stood with her, closing his own and resting his chin on her head.

Eleanora didn't mention the tears she felt drip onto her head, and Mark didn't mention the unrelenting grip she had on him.

______

Christopher Sloan!" Eleanora scolds, sitting in front of the couch that Luca was sat on. He kept taking the shoes and completely chucking them away, his face red from anger. "Momma needs to go to work, which means you and Elijah need to go to daycare, which means you need to put on shoes."