Chapter Twenty Two: A Clear Mind

Kara sat up the small bed and tried to meditate. She had always heard that meditation was something that help a person achieve inner peace though she had never tried it before. She wasn't sure that it would work but she would do her best.

Kara kept her eyes closed, and began slowing down her breathing, trying to keep herself as calm as possible. All she was seeing at this time was complete darkness which made sense. She wasn't sure if she was even suppose to see anything or not. She kept quiet for a long time, seeing and hearing nothing except her own breathing. Eventually, she fell into a deep sleep.

In the darkness, she fell, knowing not where she would end up or what was beneath her, waiting, to greet her when she lands. But she never landed, she simply continued to fall. However, whilst it had been in silence for the longest time, Kara began to hear her own voice calling out from the darkness. The denials she had made about Gwen. The turning down of Gabriel. The last words she had said to her mother. The last words she had said to her father. The last time she said I love you. The last time she said she was happy and actually meant it.

"SAY MY NAME" Kara heard herself cry out. And for the first time, she heard someone other than herself. " Witch ". It was Gabriel. God that hurt. Of course that is what she was but it didn't change the pain that she felt inside at hearing the word. He had never called her that. At least..not like that. Not with such disdain. With such hatred. With such disgust.

" I'm sorry Gabriel. I know. I will go away forever and you won't have to deal with me anymore" Kara was now hearing her own thoughts.

" I will never bother you again. I'm sorry. I love you so much and I know I'm confused but I still love you. I'd choose you a million times over if I could. I would go back in time just to fix all the pain I've caused you. I don't care about the Underworld. All I care about is you " she heard herself say over and over.

This wasn't helping her. She needed her mind cleared, not continue to be pestered by all these nagging thoughts. But she wasn't sure how she could do that.

" What is wrong with me.." Kara cries.

Kara finds herself standing in front of Gwen now, surrounded by tbe darkness. Kara wasn't surprised to see her. She knew this was coming. And she was ready. " I don't love you. I know everyone thinks that I do but I dont..I fucking used you. I used you to get over Gabriel and even then it wasn't enough. I don't need you. I never freaking needed you. All I ever needed was Gabriel..no...all I need..is Gabriel...what am I saying " Kara stopped herself, realizing something was wrong. She hadn't even noticed Gwen walking up to her, slowly, arriving face to face with her.

" No, I don't need you " Gwen pushes Kara who falls back onto what she thought would be the ground but instead was a bed. She was naked and Gwen was moving her head closer and closer down between Kara's legs. " NO! " Kara cried, raising her foot and kicking Gwen away who dissapeared from in front of Kara and appeared behind her with her arms wrapped tightly around her. " Don't you miss this? " Gwen giggled as Kara struggled to get away from her. " NO!" Kara screamed. She jammed her elbow into Gwen's gut and made her dissapear"

Gwen then appeared in front of Kara again, but this time, her face was smashed in. She looked exactly like how she had found her after her mother and Santara had finished with her.

" Gwen..YOUR DEATH ISNT ON MY HANDS. ITS NOT MY FAULT" Kara's voice made Gwen shatter in front of her. Kara fell to her hands and knees, staring down at the darkness she now found herself surrounded by again.

" I love you " Kara heard Gwen's voice call out from in front of her. " I love you too" Nate responded, as the sounds of the lips colliding made Kara weep onto the floor. " I fucking hate you. I hate you so much. You fucked everything up for me Gwen...YOU DONT DESERVE TO BE HAPPY. YOU DESERVE TO DIE " Kara jumped to her feet, fire exploding out from her body as she launched hundreds of fireballs at Gwen and Nate who simply vanished.

" I don't love you. I just wish I had never met you " Kara growled.