658. Chapter 658

Alex had been right: Maggie did get cold after stripping off her oversized jacket and putting it around Alex’s shoulders.

She did get cold, but that cold isn’t the reason she’s shaking.

“Are you a policeperson?” Kim asks out of nowhere as they walk through the rain, and Maggie looks down at her, startled before she realizes she probably shouldn’t be startled at all.

“And why would you think that?” she asks her as Alex runs a hand through her own wet hair and Maggie tries not to break, tries to keep her attention on the child with Alex’s eyes and apparently, with Alex’s sharp mind.

The child that was just an idea when they broke up, but is very, very real now.

Very, very real now, and holding both Maggie and Alex’s hands, strolling through the rain like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

Maggie’s never been more grateful for the protective covering of raindrops on her face.

“Well,” Kim squints and tilts her head, just like her mother.

Maggie’s heart lurches with an acute kind of pain she hasn’t felt in so many years. Because she hasn’t felt much of anything in so many years.

“You’re not wearing your badge, but your jeans have a little mark where a badge would go. And your eyes keep going everywhere like you’re trying to notice everything on the street all at the same time. So you could be a soldier or you could be an agent like Mommy or you could be a cop. I think cop because you don’t walk all stiff like that soldier Mommy dated last year.”

“Kimmy,” Alex groans softly, and Maggie forces herself to keep all her attention on the child, the child, not… not… anything else.

“And it seems like Mommy’s already training you to be a secret agent, huh?” she tries to keep her voice even, and she hopes Alex doesn’t hear it trembling.

“She says I can be anything! Last week I wanted to make new computer programs like Uncle Winn, but this week I think I might want to take pictures like Uncle Jimmy.” The girl shrugs gamely. “Can you fly me again?”

So they do, counting back from three and swinging their arms out so Kim’s feet leave the ground, both grateful for a five-year-old’s rapid changing of conversational pace, both grateful for her joyful shrieks so they don’t risk hearing each other’s pain.

And again, Maggie almost runs.

Because Alex looks… it suits her.

Being a mom.

Somehow, unexpectedly, it suits her, and Maggie is lost in the last time they made love, lost in the last time they danced, the last time that Alex said she loved her, but it wasn’t enough, she wasn’t enough, she was never enough –

And suddenly Alex’s hands are bracing on her upper arms, and suddenly her face is so close to hers, and Maggie almost forgets everything, almost forgets the interceding years, almost forgets the numbness and the mindless sex and the endless scotch and the constant overtime at work, because Alex Danvers is within kissing distance and Alex Danvers is –

“Maggie, you’re shaking,” she’s saying, and Maggie has to blink several times to process what the sounds passing through her lips mean. “You’re shaking all over, I told you you’d get cold, here – “

“No, Danvers, it’s fine, keep it on, I – “

“Maggie – “

“Alex – “

“Please.”

Their eyes lock in a battle that has absolutely nothing to do with the cold, but everything to do with the actual reason Maggie is shaking.

And then Maggie’s phone vibrates.

Of course it does.

Her stomach sinks as she and Alex jump apart, as they both chuckle humorlessly because sometimes, things never change.

“Captain Sawyer,” she answers crisply, and she chances a glance at Alex’s face.

She’s rewarded with the way Alex’s eyes widen with surprise and with pride and with something that looks – or used to look – like arousal.

Maggie dismisses that as a possibility, because no, because she wasn’t enough then, all the promotions in the world wouldn’t be enough to make her enough now…

But she was only supposed to be in National City for the afternoon, and she’d run into… something about fate.

Something about destiny.

“Yeah. Yeah, he gave me the files, I’ll be bringing them back on the first train out tomorrow. No, plans… something came up, and I’ll be staying the night after all. Yes. Okay. Bye.”

“Captain,” Alex croaks as Maggie slips her phone back into her pocket, and Maggie’s throat is suddenly very, very dry.

“I still have a few CIs here who will only work with me, and I – “

“Captain,” Alex repeats, and Kim’s eyes narrow slightly as she watches her mom’s eyes and the eyes of this woman lock with a particular type of intensity she’s never seen in her mother before.

Maggie shrugs. “A lot’s changed,” she says simply, and neither of them swing their eyes down to Kim. They just keep locked on each other.

“A lot’s changed,” Alex repeats, more to herself than to Maggie, her voice low and cracked and just this side of broken.

“Mommy, I miss Auntie Kara. I can see her tonight, right? We can make our thunderstorm fort together,” Kim chimes, and Maggie resists the impulse to offer the kid a high five and a job as a junior detective.

“Yeah, sweet face. Yeah. Let me call her right now,” Alex smiles as she pokes her daughter’s chin playfully, and Maggie’s heart lurches as Kim giggles and blinks extra hard at her.

Maggie tilts her head thoughtfully. Was the kid… trying to wink?

Was she that obvious?

Was Alex?

Was there anything for Alex to be obvious about?

She didn’t want her. She hadn’t wanted her.

Not enough, anyway, not…

But she’s calling Kara to watch Kim tonight, and her eyes are on Maggie even as she walks away to make the call, and there’s something in those eyes that…

Maggie gulps.

Something like fate. Something like destiny.

Something like second chances.