The Monster Within (7)

Dilapidated roads and fallen trees flashed past the window. I don't remember falling asleep with my forehead pressed against the hot glass.

I was having a dream. There I was having experiencing that terrible night. The nightmare was woven from the past. Causing chaos in my mind, where I knew everything in advance, but could not change the slightest action in my favor. I couldn't turn to my sister's room and kept knocking on my parents' door...

I couldn't stop screaming before rushing at the monster holding my sister..

I turned off the flashlight and hobbled to the door, although at that moment my soul was impatient to jump from the second floor.

Not seeing salvation, hiding in a closet, I waited for my death. But, as then, the creatures could not open the doors and did not tear me apart.

I wanted to howl so that these creatures would hear and overcome the obstacle, pull me out and take me to my sister, to my parents.

But they didn't notice me. Again and again, the actions were repeated. I couldn't count how many times I had seen my sister's mutilated body. The parents' empty room. The guttural growl of creatures. I was going crazy in a cocoon of nightmare. It was like I'm in my own personalized hell.

My feelings were not dulled for a moment, on the contrary, each time I felt despair more acutely.

I ran with all my might along the corridor, but I could not catch even a ghostly hope of salvation. In the end, I was consumed by rage.

I was glaring at the silhouette of the monster when my mouth let out a loud scream against my will, and now my sister disappears into the horizon of the night sky and the next moment I'm sitting inside the closet wrapped in a black windbreaker.

I catch a glimpse of the monster's mocking grin through the thin crack of the door, searing the image into my mind.

He stood in the middle of the room and just watched me writhe in the agony of helplessness.

I was unable to cry for help, I felt a hundred times my cowardice and I regretted being alive as much.

This long nightmare finally crushed my selfish escape from reality. It seemed that the mind itself was trying to find a way out of the situation, but there was no way out. Just an endless run along the winding paths of memories.

I couldn't stop or close my eyes. I hated the cruel world more and more, which turned me into a useless coward, unable to save a loved one. I was offended by this world, which involved everyone in a cruel game of survival.

Only one phrase was throbbing in my head.

I'll kill them. I'll kill them. I'll kill them.

All those who took away my last breath of hope, the last light, leaving me to dwell in the darkness and self-blame.

And only when emotions began to overwhelm my exhausted mind, the monster on the other side of the door came up and stretched out an ugly paw.

As the monster reached for me, I could feel a fire burning within me. The anger and hatred that had been building up inside me were now unleashed in a fury that I had never felt before. With a fierce determination, I pushed open the closet door and charged at the monster.

But the mind game is so mean and ruthless. The monster has disappeared, leaving my anger devouring me alive.

And again I lost.